A Heavenly Lesson: Take Time for Intimacy

~A vision that I was given when I was a teenager and first filled with the Holy Spirit.

He offered me something to eat as I was reading, studying and writing down the Word of God. The countryside smelled of sugar and dust. Months ago, I had been taken to this cottage of a mountain of honey hay as delicate as a moth’s hair. I would stay here until the next Jubilee with this angel of light. He asked me to call him Offer or Promise.

            I imagined rain from translucent azure waters falling through the roof and creating pools and rivers of glowing water in the house. The hay outside, moved like ripples in the wind and made waves of gold with every sweet, wistful breeze. This mountain was the only amber one. All the others were lush jade green. Often during sunsets, the ones in the distance paled into a lavender purple made rosy with the hue and heat of the setting sun. These mountains seemed as soft as mist.

            I looked up from my work at Promise. His sculpted hand held out a pearly saucer with a tea-size emerald bowl on top. The bowl was filled with a white, pasty looking substance. Promise or Offer was beautiful and tall with long hair that shone like silver in the sun. His hair appeared as gentle as silk. His eyes were as majestic as thousands of mountains that touched the sky. Yet, his eyes were kinder than a mother’s love and deep with mystery. He often wore layers of clothes, all made for the flow of the wind. Today he wore a deep pine green robe with the floral words of heaven etched on the sleeves and hem.

            I took the food with a smile as “thanks” and set it on the polished wooden table. He observed my writings and circled around the table before sitting down. I felt celestial water below my feet. It lapped over my toes and was as soothing as spa water, but when I looked down, all I saw was the white carpet. I didn’t ask Offer what was going on. Things like that always happened here. Taking up a spoon, I dipped it in the pasty white substance.

            “It is food and drink.” Offer said.

I opened my mouth and ate. It was light, like fat-free yogurt and it liquefied in my mouth as if it were whipped cream. It reminded me of a flaky pie crust sugared with cinnamon and ginger. It was dissolvable because of the thinness. It slid down my throat like a light mist and it seemed to dissolve into nothingness in my stomach. Because of this, I took a big spoonful and stuffed it in my mouth before taking another one.

            “Easy.” Offer said.

            I looked at him.

            “Go slow, it is filling you,” he continued.

            I knew his words were true, but it surely didn’t feel like it.

            “You sons and daughters of men take in too much too quickly before you are ready. It fills you, I promise.”

            He folded his hands together and then quietly stood. Again, he circled me. This time slower than the last. I saw his eyes peer at my work again which rested beside the Bible.

            “Think of it as reading the Word of God. You must go slowly. You must digest what you read and wait for full comprehension from Adoni before you continue. Most people read much too much too quickly and then claim they know the Word of God. They form their own opinions about it, or they listen to the incorrect, hasty interpretations of others because they have not studied. They have not relied on the Ruach Hakodesh to open their eyes of understanding. In this too they become worshippers of themselves as they rely more on their mind than the mind of the Spirit. Or they choose to become wedding guests instead of the Bride at the Marriage Supper of the Lamb. Intimacy takes time…a life time.”

            His words were as pure as ice forming from a water cave in the arctic. “What are you saying Promise?” I asked.

            “Read it to draw closer to Him.”

            “I…thought I was.”

            “You wrote three chapters.”

            “I’ve been here for hours. Are you saying three chapters is too much?”

            He nodded.

            “How much longer will I be here? All this must get done before that.”

            “What is that to you? That “longer” you speak of? He is in the past, the present and the future. How then can this thing you know as time exist? Only He exist and He fills all.”

            Promise saw that I failed to comprehend. He sighed slightly and smiled fondly at me. Somehow his visage assured me that all would be well.

            “Our Lord will give you enough time. In the same way as He supplied enough manna for the Israelites, His chosen ones, to eat in the wilderness everyday…He will supply you enough time. No more and no less dear one. Just keep drawing near to Him with all your heart. Remember to soar, enjoy and cherish every moment. Allow yourself to be put in all the way, in every experience.”

            I believe I understood and nodded.

            “Yahweh is not looking for quantity. He is looking for quality. A small diamond is worth more than a hundred tons of fool’s gold.”

…to be continued.

~If you’ve enjoyed this allegory, you may like my book Visions of Celestial Love. It is full of lessons that God has taught me since I first surrendered to Him. These lessons often look like “word pictures” for me. And remember, above all He wants intimacy with you. He wants your heart. He longs to sup with you in the secret place. <3

Top image by Quang Nguyen vinh from Pixabay. I chose this photo because the sun is shinning behind these men and their feet are standing on a mountain of salt. It reminded me of what Jesus said when He called us, “the salt and light of the world.” -Matthew 5:13-16.

Early Dust of Fellowship

~Dear God, thank you for loving me, and for guiding me, for creating time for me to spend with You. For touching my hands and moving my heart

Have you ever sat blissed out from the rich and loving voice of God?

My heart takes flight, my eyes water from His grace.

Oh, to feel His soft touch waking you up to fellowship.

To be broken and then healed after His arms hold you. After Jesus cleans and washes you inside from His glowing light.

Oh, to see the haze of golden love.

Oh, to look out the window and see the white sparkling fog kiss this grassy land.

The ocean carrying peace.

Oh, to hear the beat of His worship-playing drums.

To be His child, found in His heart.

What a blessing to hear The Truth.

To be dearly loved by The Way, and The Life.

I can hear the voices and the music of worship floating and surrounding me on the outside, taking me, then seeping into me and ringing inside of me.

What joy it is to fall on my knees.

This love is unexplainable.

I have no worries.

I feel no fear in His presence.

Two words from Him are more than a thousand from a lover.

What seed has He planted inside of me? It has grown into a fruit-bearing tree that sees a constant gauzy sunrise. The deep colors of plump fruit hang and grow on it; raspberry, orange, peach, and red-colored fruit glisten in His light. Jesus creates fog that collects into drops of water on its green leaves, and then drips to a moist, rich soil, so lush with life.

What waterfall of blessings is this I see in the distance, behind purple mountains warmed by Life?

Its waters pour from Heaven, from the throne of Almighty God. Blue waters of every blessing He has given me fall like fountain water.

Why do my arms lift effortlessly?

They feel His touch and an offering is being given. How can such a love exist?

I’ve been taken away.

I’ve been divinely called and so have you.

Here I rest.

Here I lay.

Here I eat of His Word, of His fruit.

Here I abide in Christ.

Here I stroll through Heaven.

Here I visit the tabernacle, His home.

Here I climb Mount Zion.

Here I hear the angels’ praise. Their celestial voices powerful, beautiful, yet they meet my ears with a calming hum.

Here I twirl with praise like ripples, I move with the current of everlasting love. I touch the golden-colored flowers; I study the blue of the sky.

I am delivered a pen and paper to surrender, to share this incredible Love with anyone who’ll listen.

He longs to take you here.

To create this land inside of you.

Search deep inside your Spirit.

You can see it.

You can feel it.

You can taste it.

Maybe differently, but you do.

It rocks your heart and opens your senses.

He fulfills you like no one or nothing ever could.

Seconds with Him are worth more than a lifetime of wealth.

Our God reins, forever His kingdom stands! My feet have never caressed such soft coco-colored soil as they have in this land. My eyes have never gazed upon something more beautiful.

Have you ever sat blissed out from the rich and loving voice of God?

My heart has been made into the house of Jesus.

~This devotional was taken from my book Visions of Celestial Love. To find out more about it, visit the Purchasable Goody page. To buy a copy, click here. <3

Never Apart

It’s amazing when you know Someone loves you so much that even death can’t do you part….

…only Jesus

I’ve been realizing and experiencing the reality that I will never be alone another second of my life. This truth has been like a blanket of incense around my heart and wells of living peace bubbling up from the depths of me. xoxo

This Man is becoming the singular desire of my eyes, the One my heart flies freely into. This intimacy is intertwined so intricately and completely that I can’t separate my identity from Him. Where does He start? Where do I end? I look up and I see that I am swallowed by His affectionate heartbeat. I am beginning to taste Heaven even while I’m on earth. Heaven is Him, the Father and the Holy Spirit.

For you died to this life, and your real life is hidden with Christ in God – Colossians 3:3

“I and the Father are one.” -Jesus in John 10:30 

The only true and saving source of love is found on calvary…where Jesus died to His life so we can be reborn and have His life in us. Such love that the Father GAVE the closest thing to His heart! For you and me! He never withholds His affection, He never withholds His goodness! He never withdraws His grace. 

I pray He leads you relationally to that sweet place of abiding. May you see and recognize His faithful presence with you always. His love surrounds you. He paid everything He could, so you could be with Him forever. Such love!

~If you enjoyed this devotional, you might want to check out my book Visions of Celestial Love. It’s filled with poems, devotionals and short stories meant to draw your heart closer to Jesus. <3

Mercy’s Intimate Touch

And if you had only known what this statement means, ‘I desire compassion [for those in distress], and not [animal] sacrifice,’ you would not have condemned the innocent.
-Jesus in Matthew 12:7 AMP

When your child is sick, it’s easy to feel like your faith is crumbling around you. I faced one of the biggest scares of my life one early dark morning when my daughter seized up in her crib. She had been physically struggling after receiving a vaccination and she’d become extremely feverish. My heart melted like butter when I saw the cloudiness in her grey eyes and heard the sharp cry of pain that came only seconds before her body began twitching uncontrollably. Her harrowing cry was like a knife to my heart. She was just barely one. I lifted her light body out of the crib and sat her on the bed next to my husband, “wake up!” I sobbed. Eden crumpled up and jerked involuntarily. She didn’t recognize my face or my voice for almost half an hour. Panic came in like a thief in the night and after her rushed trip to the ER (filled with shots and medical scans) she was sent home. My family and I spent days around the clock watching her.

And for days none of the treatment that she had received at the ER seemed to be holding up. Her state was alarmingly erratic. During those tiresome days of attending to her meticulously, I felt the stony weight of condemnation in my soul. Like a rock attempting to divide the roots of my faith…or a hungered weed, attempting to steal the scared places in my heart that only belonged to God. This “feeling” of condemnation came to uproot a little bit of my security in the love of God (Song of Solomon 1:15).

You see, I know it’s hard when the pains of life come unexpectedly. Whenever we go through slicing pain, it can be tempting to harden our hearts in disbelief concerning God’s Word or His nature. The devil doesn’t come donned in an obvious cloak of black and red with a pitchfork. No, he comes with the subtlety of religious philosophy that longs to poison our confidence in Christ and our identity in Him (it only takes a little yeast to leaven the whole loaf Matthew 16:6). He comes to incriminate us and God in our ears. Our “un-graced” mindsets, flare up like crimson algae creating a red tide in the ocean of our conscious. Accusations pop up like smokey fumes. This flare reveals the hidden places of self-blame and shame in us. It unearths the places of self-righteousness that naturally reject grace and denounce the true nature of God. What was in the dark, comes to light when we give in to fear.



For several hours I cried out to God with self-loathing because when I prayed for my daughter, nothing seemed to happen. I had lost touch with the purity of the gospel in those moments of panic (Romans 1:16). When I had prayed for Eden, I was secretly doing it out of self-effort instead of trusting in God’s all consuming grace (Galatians 3:1-2). I was really trusting in my own strength. more than that, I was trusting in my animal sacrifices (holy lifestyle) to earn the healing of God. I was cheapening the gift of faith-righteousness for my own brand of works-righteousness. I was defaming the sacrifice of Jesus for my own sacrifice. (Condemnation is a very slippery and clandestine slope…but I promise you it only comes when we take our eyes off of Jesus for our right-standing with God and put ourselves in His place Romans 5:1).

One morning I woke up to the misty scents of God’s mercy. He came quickly to rescue and reconcile my heart to His love. I realize that throughout all the trails in my life… that it is vitally important to always connect to the Father’s undying love in the midst of the storm. God woke me up to mercy. He showed me His beauty and deep care. In doing so, He effortlessly removed the stone of doubt and guilt that was seeking to grip land in my soul. I felt His love in those moments like fragrant ointment being poured on my skin and shortly after, because of His grace, Eden was divinely healed. She made a full recovery in less than 24 hours. Once I was empowered by His love to receive the truth of His mercy, I was able to breathe in confidence and faith came out like a sighing exhale.

I want to encourage you, that if you can’t get your faith to “work” during a crisis or difficult situation, to not allow condemnation to sneak its way into your soul. Resist all notions of guilt. God’s miracle is not based on your ability to be good enough but on Jesus being your substitute (He is your goodness before the Father). I pray that you will be strengthened by the incredible love of God for you and His immense and glorious grace that is freely given in Christ Jesus. Healing is never earned, deliverance is never earned, salvation is never earned. It’s only by the love of God through Jesus and our faith in that, that we receive His goodness. May you find the simplicity of the Gospel to be sweet salvation in all of your circumstances.

The miracle of that mercy-filled morning for me was not my daughter’s healing. It was that my soul became so captivated with the mercy of God even when the symptoms were still present, that I worshiped despite the circumstances. I adored Him and the fear so disappeared that I forgot all concern for my daughter. His love for me and my daughter surpassed my love for her, my love for myself and my love for Him.

This poem was birthed through intimacy with God during that tender morning:

Relationship with Him looks like mercy–like deep sweet waters perfumed with grace. This grace is heady, like the whiff of strong aged wine. It is as intoxicating as fragrant floral hills bathed in rainbow colored flowers.

You are as beautiful as Tizrah my God, lovely as Jerusalem my Father, more awesome than an army with bright banners my Husband.

You melt my soul with your eyes of deep love and care. Your compassionate heart soothes my inner worries.

Your very Presence is a vaporous mist vaster than the mountainous clouds that sheet the amazon rainforests.

You are light and beauty.

Water and wine.

You are Living Bread…the substance that makes me whole.

I am enraptured by You.

Romanced by Who You are.

Captivated by your tresses.

I am smitten to my inner core.

I find I am threaded into You by your divine hand. A three fold cord is not easily broken.

You share your heartbeat with me and my eyes are fascinated by You.

I feast at the table in your soul and your banner over me is undying love.

A recent picture of Eden 11/05/2019

Angel Encounters

Therefore, angels are only servants–spirits sent to care for people who will inherit salvation – Hebrews 1:14 <3

This picture means so much to me. It’s been dear to my heart since the early years when I was filled with the Holy Spirit. I always saw myself as a child in God’s eyes and I prayed for angelic protection. Now, I’ve been pretty apprehensive in the past to share about my supernatural experiences with angels because I fear some people will take their eyes off Jesus who is the only One worthy of adoration (well, Jesus, God and Holy Spirit). Sometimes supernatural experiences can be sensationalized….and really, God wants the simplicity of a pure, deep, intimate, faithful and thriving relationship with us…. like a Father to His children, or a Husband to His wife. He’s done things for me (and for you) that are extravagant, but really, He is the extravagance, the true treasure.

I can swing pretty hard one way and become extreme quickly if I’m not too careful. There was one point where I belittled Father’s supernatural gifts to me and didn’t really thank Him or appreciate them like I should. A grateful heart is precious to the Giver. I have since repented of my flippant attitude toward angelic encounters and I wanted to share some of them with you. I say some because when I share too much as a writer…sometimes I feel like I am stripping my heart of treasures and not everyone appreciates or gives the treasures of their hearts in return. I only pray these testimonies encourage you to know that you serve a supernatural God who loves you and will employ heavens armies to help you, protect you, warn you and yes, even speak to you (although direct heart messages from the Holy Spirit and Jesus trump anything external):

1) Two days ago, in worship I was experiencing God’s loving gentleness, like a soothing spa bath. In worship, I was reminded of the three angels who came to me in a dream. This was during a season where I had just been delivered from demonic oppression and I was deciding on whether or not I would attend Bible college. In my dream, I had just come home from working at my church’s preschool (so this felt very real). When I walked into my room I saw 3 handsome men inside. They were all relaxed, like they had been waiting on me for a while. I wanted to ask them who they were and to get out! Then inside of me I sensed they weren’t human…but actually angels. I felt peace and a sense of calm. One of them was laying on my bed with his legs folded, the other was sitting on the carpeted floor and the other one was gazing out my bedroom window. The one who gazed out my window came toward me. He looked like he was 28.

“Where are your bags?” he asked me calmly.

“My bags?” I questioned.

His eyes became incredulous, like I should have known this information (but in a sweet way…it’s kind of hard to explain).

“Yes,” he said, “for Bible college. Why aren’t you packed?”

My eyes widened, “oh! Yes, I’m so sorry! I’ll get them packed right away!”

I brushed past him…not even glancing at the others.

“We will be in the car waiting,” the angel said and I saw a small red car at the front of Alice’s house in a vision.

They all left me to my packing.

I scurried around the room gathering my things and suddenly I remembered my brother Alex. He had to come with me! I called him up.

(Now, if you know me very well, you know that I had a habit of dragging my brother around with me on my God-adventures. At the drop of a hat I could say, “Alex, I’m going south tomorrow and I want you to come.” And he would come lol).

This time, God was letting me know in my dream that he wouldn’t be my tag-along anymore. He showed me these 3 angels would escort me to Bible college.

However, like many Biblical characters, I was stubborn. And Alex ended up coming with me anyway. Later I was a bit stressed about it, thus I reaped the reward of my stubbornness.

A few weeks into Bible college my, then friend, and now husband would tell me frequently, “I see a man standing outside your door a lot.”

“A classmate?”

“No, an angel. Sometimes I’ll just look up and there he is, arms on the railing, standing there.”

2) This encounter goes back to my teen years. I had just been filled with the Holy Spirit and I was doubting my salvation. The fruit of salvation was evident in my life. God talked to me often and I talked to Him. I felt His nearness and peace and yet religious thinking was causing me to doubt. So, I asked Him one day when I was alone at home, “am I saved?”

He answered right away, “yes.”

I felt peace but was still unconvinced. I went into my room and knelt by my dresser with my Bible in my lap. Suddenly my eyes lifted and I saw a huge angel in my room. He was hovering and I sensed him spiritually. He said, “Ashley, you are saved.” And then he left. I just stared blankly.

I began to doubt again and within about 30 seconds of my angelic encounter my cell buzzed.

I picked it up and my friend (who is also a brother in the Lord) said excitingly, “Ashley! I was just talking to the Lord and He told me you and I are saved!”

Now, you would think I would leap for joy, right? My security of living with Jesus for all eternity and the treasures of Heaven were secured for me. But did I leap? No. I said with less enthusiasm than should be possible, “that’s wonderful. Thank you for sharing that with me.”

Don’t be like me lol. Scripture and the Holy Spirit should be enough confirmation for you about your salvation. Jesus paid it in full.

3) I was taking a shower and was just finishing up. When I drew the curtains back I saw that I had left my towel on the sink which was past the commode. My eyes drifted to the towel railing and I thought to lean on it and stretch my body toward my towel so I wouldn’t drip on the floor. The Lord told me, “don’t do that. The railing isn’t stable.”

I heard His voice, but ignored Him, “it’ll just be for a second,” I reasoned.

I put my hand on the railing and went to reach for my towel.

Of course, the railing gave way and I started to fall.

My fall should have been painful. I should have bucked my knees on the tub wall and slammed down. Instead, midway down I felt wind rush underneath me and someone caught my body in midair! I was then softly put down until my hands and arms held me up!

I knew an angel had caught me.

“Thank you,” I said as I stood up and went for my towel to dry off.

~I hope God encouraged you somehow through these stories. I would love to hear some of your stories as well! How has Father used angels or people or His Spirit to care for you? May we be mutually encouraged in the faith through our testimonies of His goodness and grace.


P.S: Contrary to popular imagery angels are never presented in the Bible as women or feminine. I just had to say that. So, if you have an encounter with a female looking angel I would question that. Everything must be tested by scripture! No supernatural experience that breaks scripture is good. The Bible is our guidebook for behavior, for finances and yes, for supernatural encounters. There’s a real devil out there who loves to disguise himself as an angel of light. Jesus Christ is the authority for all truth, the Redeemer, higher than all the angels and our Savior. He is also healing for every heart and the only One who can truly satisfy the longing of our souls. Go to Him to be made whole. He loves you with all His heart <3

~To read more testimonies like this, check out my book, Visions of Celestial Love.

Ashley McClelland presents us with a true cornucopia of modern psalms, personal testimonies, and short stories. She has set out to reveal and unravel some of the most complex heart issues mankind faces in our quest of understanding what true intimacy with God really looks like. Prepare to have your soul massaged and worked on as you read Visions of Celestial Love.” — Jeremy Minard, Servant King Apparel

Sharon’s Love

~A short story about forgiveness, written from the perspective of an unfaithful, ambitious husband

“Sharon,” I mumbled as I slipped in and out of consciousness.

“Rose,” I heard a sweet voice reply. My eyes slurred beneath my eyelids. Rose of Sharon, I thought wistfully, remembering Song of Solomon. It was her intimate name…the name I had called her when we consummated our marriage. The smell of vaporous pear butter soothed my senses. My body was sweaty and achy. Pain licked up my back as I tried to shift.

“Shhh, rest now,” the soft voice said. My eyes were crusted close.

“I want to see,” I groaned, pleading inside for sight. I heard shuffling in the room and a shaft of light moved—curtains were being drawn back.

“I know,” Sharon replied, tears coating her voice, “I’ve prayed for you to see for years now.” Her uttered words were like a palpable force leaving me wondering how deeply I had hurt her.

 A tea kettle whistled and for a moment I could sense her peaceful presence no more. Water was being poured. Moaning weakly, I felt for her with my hands, craving the comfort of her touch. She drew by my side and took hold of my hand. Her supple fingers were smooth like running cream. She lightly caressed my fingertips before she intertwined her hand in mine. She sat beside me and plush lips moist with tears met my perspiring forehead.

“You’ve been in the dark too long,” she whispered.

She released my hand, dipped hers in a bowl of oiled water and gently rubbed her thumbs across my eyes. I breathed deeply as the scent of frankincense and myrrh created an aromatic fog around my face.

“It’s anointing oil,” Sharon soothed.

My eyes fluttered open and the golden sunlight pouring in from the window almost blinded me. Translucent curtains waved as a fresh breeze seeped in from the cracked windowsill.

My eyes squinted as Sharon dipped a floral towel in the steaming water. It was the same towel she had worked on for weeks. I had called it a “rag” in the past—considering it drab and ugly. Only now could I see the delicate detail she had put in it. Bright red apples danced like rubies across the cloth.

Sharon smiled tenderly at me as she carefully wiped the sweat from my brow and dabbed my neck and chest with the towel. I relaxed as she worked, feeling a healing presence gently warm my body through her fingertips. For a moment, the sunlight formed a halo behind her silhouette.



Why was she doing this?

I had walked out on her and fully intended to take all of our marital assets, given time. If it hadn’t been for that potentially fatal car accident last week, that temporarily had me bedridden, I would have done so by now. I knew how to swindle the system well—banking, no greed, had taught me that. Greed for wealth had made me a cunning swindler…a breaker of her heart.

The words she had oft spoken to me came back, “Love is patient…it keeps no record of wrongs…God’s love in us does not fail.”

I peered at her. Her eyes were like the richest cinnamon glinting with flecks of amber. Her glossy raspberry lips and cheeks were awash with tears. I could see the trail of them on her chin and neck. She moved to massage my scalp when I caught her wrist. A small gasp escaped her lips and she stared at me.

I’m sorry. The words burned to escape my throat.

I only looked back at her. My jaw clenched and my eyes twitched.

Why couldn’t I say it?

What held me back?

Her beatific eyes rained rivers of love on me and something in my heart broke free like water crashing against a dam.

“Why?!” I wept brokenly, surprised to find myself crying.

“Because God’s love never fails.”

My eyes widened as the empyrean light behind her became a Man. Like a balmy song, a cherubic voice spoke in the air, “I’ve prayed for you to see for years now.”


~This short story was taken from my book Visions of Celestial Love

“Ashley presents us with a true cornucopia of modern psalms, personal testimonies, and short stories. She has set out to reveal and unravel some of the most complex heart issues mankind faces in our quest of understanding what true intimacy with God really looks like. Prepare to have your soul massaged and worked on as you read Visions of Celestial Love.” — Jeremy Minard, Founder of Servant King Apparel, Active U.S Navy

Grace House

~A short allegoric story charting my journey back to grace. Like Jesus told parables to make heaven’s kingdom more relatable to his culture, I like to use short “fictional” stories to roadmap inner realities of my relationship with Jesus. I pray the Holy Spirit uses this story to minister healing grace to a deep place in your soul. Taken from my book Visions of Celestial Love


Shianne was having a hard time falling asleep. Gentle snow sprinkled down outside like the dust of white gold. She shivered underneath her fuzzy blue covers not from lack of physical warmth, but because of the cold memories that enveloped her dreams…her thoughts, her every moment.

She listened to the symphony of snores that came from the other children. All lay peacefully in pools of silky sheets and puffy quilts. She cuddled her knees and her subconscious pushed through, revisiting scenes of the abuses she’d suffered.

Suddenly she wasn’t in the safety of Jesus’s home; she was in the sweat shop scrabbling to mix mud together for bricks. Her tormenting taskmasters wore the guise of foster parents. There was the mistress, the headmistress and her fake father. Each exemplified cruelty in their own unique way. The head mistress was never pleased with what she did. She’d yell at her, look disdainfully upon her and reminded her that she wasn’t good enough. She acted as condemnation.

Her fake father would approve of her, but only when she served him without fault. He loved her performance, not her heart—and that perhaps was the most damaging. He acted as law without mercy.

The other mistress would execute judgment on her whenever the head mistress and her fake father were displeased. She acted as the tormentor.

Shianne could remember cold beatings in the night of winter. She remembered the small rations of food they gave her. She remembered the bruises she bore, still unhealed. Her life was a cycle of hopeless misery and endless work until a kind Man with deeply warm eyes came upon her and paid for her. He’d caught sight of her on the street, knee deep in snow and shivering. He’d brought her a warm bowl of soup and warm water.

“Here,” He said softly, His breath was the tenderness of a thousand hearths. He placed the bowl in her hands and untied His long scarf before draping it over her shivering shoulders. “Would you like to come home with Me, My child?”

Slipping into a state of unconsciousness, Shianne nodded her head before the gentle Man cupped her in His arms and tugged His arms around her. Her head lay peacefully on His shoulder and He whispered, “I’ll take care of you from now on. You’re Mine now. You’re home.”

When she awoke, Shianne was in a big four-story house filled with kids. They were all taken off the streets. Was this an orphanage?

Jesus greeted her and kissed her on the forehead. “Good morning, princess. Welcome to the House of Grace. This is your home from now on.”

Grace? She wondered. Every day the kids played freely in grace, they took piano lessons by the grand fireplace, read books in the library hall, went to class, were fed delicious meals, and had their cuddles with Jesus in the morning and before bed. Angels would attend the children; they worked for Jesus. Everything in the grace house was perfect. It seemed too good to be true.

One night when Shianne was trembling in bed from another nightmare, Jesus scooted behind her in bed and wrapped His arms around her chest. In the safety of His arms Shianne began to cry audibly. He formed His body around her little one and the warmth from His heart entered into her soul.

“I love you, I love you, I love you,” He kept repeating.

Whenever she was behaved badly at the school, had troubles, didn’t understand a question, or had an issue, Jesus always said the same thing, “I love you…I love you…I love you.”

She wondered at Him all the time. He was always so gracious, so kind, so sweet, so loving, so beautiful. He never gave her what she deserved. Everything was a gift.

And the house she lived in—this Grace House—seemed to accommodate everything she desired. It was almost as if the house was alive. The carpet was softer than fur, the walls were perfectly painted, and sometimes, when Shianne squinted, it almost looked like it was made out of moving lights, so still yet so fast that it appeared solid. Jesus told her that the Holy Spirit was the life force of the house. He was in the air, the walls, the floor—everywhere.

The food was perfect, and her body that had once been limp and sickly was now full and warm. Her apple cheeks flushed with color and her hair, once thin, was now as thick as straw. She hardly recognized herself.

Outside the drifting snow had stilled, leaving the city glowing with a blanket of snow. Shianne’s eyes blinked as she tried to organize her thoughts. Finally she slipped out of bed. The carpet glowed blue wherever she stepped. It was like star dust, a perfect opal.

Not wanting to wake up the other kids, who slept peacefully, she softly rebuked, “No, not now!” The carpet instinctively stopped. “Thank you,” she whispered and felt the soft furs of the carpet tickle her bare feet as a way of saying “you’re welcome.”

Whereas once she would have been afraid, Shianne smiled and headed out the door. Nimbly closing the door behind her Shianne, wandered the halls. Everything in the house was still, yet living. It was almost surreal. Each room held a different fragrance of love for her young heart.

She could always tell when she was getting closer to Jesus. Her heart would begin glowing with warmth and then burning like she was in a hot spring of the soul. The scents of love in the house would increase…the walls would light up in polychromatic show and angelic voices would sing in jubilant and melodious tune, like an invisible choir. As if…all creation sang whenever He was around. A tangible peace would coat her like a mist; it was a feeling sweeter than honey.



Her heart wanted Jesus as she thought about Him, and she breathed into the air, “I want You.” “I want You more.” Shianne gasped and stopped. She felt her chest, patted different areas. It was almost like an audible voice spoke from her heart. It wasn’t her voice, but the voice that was gentler than a thousand hearths. “Jesus?” She wondered out loud. “I’m always with you loved one. Yet I wait for you to come to Me.” Still a little bit stunned Shianne voiced,“I want to see You tonight.” “I’m waiting in the library.” The voice sounded happy, pleased that she was opening up her heart, learning to trust in His love.

Quickening her step Shianne headed to the library, but as she got closer she slowed down. Old memories of her days of living in the House of Law tried to surface, fear knocked to be welcomed in again. It tried to separate her from trusting Jesus, from drawing near to Him in a heart relaxed with love.

It growled and sneered, “He’s just like me…just like the law without the spirit of mercy. Do you really think you can trust Him? That He’s safe? That He’ll protect you…love you unconditionally? He’s disappointed in you. You have to work to please Him. Go back.”

Just when her heart began to give into panic, the scent of pumpkin bread spiced with nutmeg almost overwhelmed her. The walls began to glow a translucent desert pink, honey-bee yellow, sparkling lavender, and emerald green. The songs of angels filled the halls like the wafts of air licked with the wine of an endless floral field. She felt warm gentle waters inside her chest. Her eyes lit up as she saw the door to the library. A joy unspeakable welled inside her soul as she thought about seeing Jesus. Her steps quickened again.

Shianne arrived at the door and peeked inside. The fireplace was burning inside; gentle crackling and popping noises sounded. The pearl carpet glowed with hues of yellow from the flames. Wooden book shelves tall as the ceiling were filled with books. Little desks circled a big desk, where the Teacher taught. Paintings lined the walls, pictures of heaven made with vibrant oil paint. Teddy bears, along with other stuffed animals, decorated the circle carpet. Palm branches stood on the sides of the hearth and vines climbed the walls with pink flowers. Shianne’s heart began to burn when she saw Jesus. He was sitting and reading a book. He looked so peaceful, so restful. He was the very image of love to her.

He leaned His head on an arm and had one leg folded over the other in a chair. His elbow rested on his leg. He wore a white-collar shirt with a maple brown sweater vest. He also had black dress pants. His shoes were kicked off but He kept His socks on. He was nothing grand to look at…but there was a river, a presence on the inside of Him that flowed out, encompassing Him in beauty that was alive. He was Man, but also Spirit. The Spirit inside of Him, His true self, flowed through the pores of the skin He wore in unstoppable kindness, compassion, love, mercy, healing and wisdom. Jesus seemed to sense her and smiled with His eyes as He looked up.

He put down the book on the floor by His chair. His eyes were like cinnamon gleaming with flecks of amber. The firelight illuminated His frame. Love poured from His frame.

“Hello, my little love,” He said, all the joy of heaven flowing from His lips and visage.

He smiled brightly and opened up His arms. Shianne found herself running into those arms and being swept up into His lap. He ducked His head down and nuzzled her shoulder with His chin. Cheek brushed against cheek and Shianne felt the Holy Spirit in wave after wave of peace and tender love wash over her.

The air became colorful and the sound of music from angelic voices erupted.

“They’re singing over You,” Shianne said.

“No, my little darling, I’m singing over you,” Jesus whispered.

Shianne’s eyes widened. Jesus explained still holding her close, “This is My love song to you. You make My heart sing. I made creation and you are made in my image. I love you, and creation responds to My love for you. Our bond makes the earth and heavens sing.”

The words sunk in the bedrock of Shianne’s heart. She felt them go deep into the soil of her being. Seeds of life that Jesus’s love would nurture. He held unto her for a long time, and kissed her forehead a few times.

“You’re a good little girl,” He said before leaning back. His arms relaxed their hold on her, without letting go. His hands were tied and laid on her legs.

“You’re perfect and holy in My eyes. You are a reflection of all My affections; nothing can separate you from My love.”

Shianne’s young eyes welled with tears at His tender words. She wanted to believe Him…but she couldn’t reconcile the voices of law she sometimes heard and His abundant healing grace. She bit and chewed on her bottom lip, licking it a few times. Jesus felt her small body begin to squirm in His arms, He assured her by gently rubbing her back. After twittling with her fingers for a few seconds Shianne mustered up her strength, “But what about the voices?”

Jesus leaned in closely until her back pressed into His chest. He spoke softly, “Those are nightmares beloved, dreams, shadows, only memories. They aren’t real. I have defeated them outwardly. Now only the echoes of their memory remain in your head. Let My loving truth drown them out.”

“They feel real,” she murmured tears welling up.

“He will never hurt you or have you again as long as you remain in this Grace House. The only real reason why it feels real is because he’s affected your emotions. But it’s not real. The longer you stay here the more your mind will be refreshed by the knowledge of My grace and truth. As this happens your emotions will continually be healed until the river of life that’s in you floods you and touches the world around you. Once you’ve grown fully in grace, you’ll be an adult. It is good for the heart to be established by grace.”

Shianne relaxed in Jesus’s arms and smiled, “All I have to do is stay here?”

He nodded with an equally tender smiled, “Yes, and continue to eat and drink of My goodness and loving-kindness. That’s all you have to do. Enjoy Me, enjoy your brothers and sisters. Be filled with love and love will fill your character. Your soul will be transformed by My grace and truth. Shianne, everything is provided for you here. In Me, in My grace you have everything. Stay here and abide in Me and you will not only be free physically, but you will experience my salvation in your soul and walk in the fullness of the freedom that I have already given you. My Shianne, I love you more than you understand right now and I will never stop loving you, dear one.”

Feeling the assurance of His love Shianne leaned her lips into His cheek and gave Jesus a short kiss. Jesus’s eyes welled with tears of happiness and He cupped her face and kissed her on the forehead. As she studied His face Shianne realized that her one little kiss filled Him with such joy; she could see the gleam of it in His eyes. His love was so pure and gentle and true and protective. She’d never known what it was like to have a Big Brother, but He was the perfect One.

“Now, little lass, are you ready for bed again?” Jesus asked her.

She nodded her head and wrapped her arms around His neck as He rose. He began to walk down the hall and Shianne could still hear the angels’ music. She couldn’t see them, but their whimsical lullaby spoke to her of love everlasting and grace never ending. Jesus’s arms spoke to her of safety and trust. Soon her open eyes began to flutter, until she closed them and began to drift to sleep. She felt Jesus place her in bed and then tuck her in.

He put His hands on her chest and prayed, “Father, thank You that You have given me this little one. And what You give me will never be lost. I pray for her heart. That it would continue to grow in grace and be enlightened by Your love for her and who she truly is—a princess destined to be a queen, the one that You love, the apple of Your eye and Your precious creation. I speak peace to her.”

For a moment Shianne felt like she was floating on a cloud somewhere where the sun never set, in a land where the streets shone like gold. She glimpsed Heaven and felt the pleasure of her heavenly Father for her. It was like nothing she had ever experienced before.


“Come, all you are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost. Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy? Listen, listen to me and eat wha tis good, and you will delight in the richest of fare.” – Isaiah 55:1-2 NIV

Are you ready to taste of the sweet delicacies of God in a deeply reviving and personal way? For those who want to drink, for those who want to eat and be refreshed and renewed, Visions of Celestial Love is a feast between you and the King of Heaven, who loves you more than anyone else. He invites you to dine on wholesome, good, savory food and delicious, zesty, fruitful drink. He awaits you with a sparkle in His eye. He is ready for your company. He delights to have you as a guest.

“Eat, friends, and drink; drink your fill of love.” – Song of Songs 5:1 NIV

“Ashley presents us with a true cornucopia of modern psalms, personal testimonies, and short stories. She has set out to reveal and unravel some of the most complex heart issues mankind faces in our quest of understanding what true intimacy with God really looks like. Prepare to have your soul massaged and worked on as you read Visions of Celestial Love.” — Jeremy Minard, Servant King Apparel

~To purchase a copy of my book, click here. May you be greatly blessed and encouraged!

Do not be carried away by all kinds of strange teachings, for it is good for the heart to be strengthened by grace and not by foods of no value to those devoted to them. -Hebrews 13:9 BSB

Sweet Cup of Your Words

~This devotion was taken from my book Visions of Celestial Love

A bright sunny grassland stretches forth, with a merry sky and vibrant flowers. Jesus, You are sitting on a turf covered rock and I am sitting by Your feet, looking up with wonder at Your words. As You speak, Your words show up as changing colorful lights in the spiritual realm. They move like clouds thick with water. Like formless sparkling clouds radiating glimmering golden dust, they flow to me, forming a marble cup as beautiful as amber alabaster stone, yet softer than rose petals in April’s light rain.

Continue speaking dear Jesus, my heart begs. I reach for the cup and it drifts into my hands. Tell me of true love, I ask inside. Your words are never-endingly beautiful. As You continue, Your words become life-giving liquid in my cup: words that are spiritually healing and heart-strengthening. I gladly lift my cup to my lips and drink in the truth. Just one cup full of Your love lasts a lifetime.

Jesus’s words become sweet fruit and warm bread that I eat until I am filled, cleansed, and healed spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and physically.

Satisfied, content, and unashamed, I freely lay my hands on His leg like a daughter would her father. I rest my chin on my hands and smile at Him, looking up with peaceful hazel eyes. Jesus rubs my back in circular motions. His hand feels like hot spa water on my back. Like spa rocks, His touch relaxes my muscles and removes all pain.

“Beloved and child,” He calls me. “Darling and beautiful.”

My heart melts with His endearing words. The wind picks up and blows on the fabric of His long lengthy robe. I am lost in His clothing as it blows over my face, like a child through her mother’s clothesline on a breezy day. Covered in the dust of my Rabbi, I am found in His pure love.

“A delightful book that reflects the praises from a heart that desires to abide closely with our Heavenly Father. Written in a style that summons us to experience a journey of deeper intimacy with a loving God. Ashley covers the foundation of the Christian faith that brings encouragement and assurance of God’s promises when faced with life’s challenges. Embracing our uniqueness and the safety of transparency before our Maker who cares about the most intricate details of our life. Yes, an invitation indeed from the One and only who can fill what are heart’s ache for.” — Jocelyn Reyna, Entrepreneur

Growing Through and in Rest

~Taken from my book Visions of Celestial Love

For we who have believed (adhered to and trusted in and relied on God) do enter that rest in accordance with His declaration that those [who did not believe] should not enter when He said, As I swore in My wrath, They shall not enter My rest; and this He said although [His] works had been completed and prepared [and waiting for all who would believe] from the foundation of the world. —Hebrews 4:3 AMPC

Pause, and think calmly about those words.

Something about this scripture jumped out at me, and I have not myself to thank, nor my own intelligence, but the Holy Spirit. He’s the Life in the Word. The One who makes it living and active. Without Him, reading God’s Word is like reading another book—and there is hardly anything sadder than that. Do you see the word “works” in here?

Whose work, is it? It’s God’s.

Our only job, the one that we’ve always had, even in the old covenant, is to believe.

The same is true today, underneath the righteousness, blood, grace, and work of Christ.

Believing secures our rest. The rest God ordained for us to have before the foundations of the world. The rest of relationship.

Let’s continue reading about rest in Hebrews:

Again He sets a definite day, [a new] Today, [and gives another opportunity of securing that rest] saying through David after so long a time in the words already quoted, Today if you would hear His voice and when you hear it, do not harden your hearts. [This mention of a rest was not a reference to their entering into Canaan.] For if Joshua had given them rest, He [God] would not speak afterward about another day.

—Hebrews 4:7–8 AMPC

Think again for a moment. Before you read on, ask the Holy Spirit to help you grasp what this means.

I believe that entering God’s rest was more important than receiving the promised land. I believe it was more important than the Israelites entering into Canaan or even crossing over the Jordan to obtain the promise of land.

God was more interested in His people having relationship with Him. God’s always been more about the internal soul and the spiritual than He is about physical possessions.

Once again, ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to you the meaning of these scriptures; He might give you more information, more insight than He’s given me here.

Perhaps the purpose of them entering the land was for them to enter into rest. The only way to that was belief. Trusting faith. A heart that knows God, knows He’s good, and knows His nature. A heart that knows His thoughts toward us, and more specifically you.

He’s a giver. Always has been, always will be. His nature does not change. He’s the same yesterday, today, and forevermore.

So then, there is still awaiting a full and complete Sabbath-rest reserved for the [true] people of God; For he who has once entered [God’s] rest also has eased from [the weariness and pain] of human labors, just as God rested from those labors peculiarly His own.

—Hebrews 4:9–10 AMPC

There is such beautiful promise in here.

Aren’t you tired of working? Of striving?

There is a sanctified striving that should exist in every believer of Jesus Christ, but it is often perverted.

We’re not striving to be accepted by God, or acceptable to Him. Our works, our striving will never get us that. Our striving should be out of rest, in a place of absolute peace. Done from joy, and with joy. Done out of love, in love, and through love. This cannot be done without belief. Our works shouldn’t even really feel like work.

Wanting to know our Jesus, wanting to be like Him, should be a part of our nature, as getting food or water to drink is when we’re hungry or thirsty. It should be a daily activity. It should be a mental domain, an internal setting.

When I asked if you were tired of working, I was talking about the working you see being done every day.

I mean look around you. Look at your loved ones. Look at the strangers on the street. The college students. The moms, the dads of our society just trying to pay the bills, fix ourselves and squeeze whatever joy we can out of life as if we’ve got a dried lemon in our hands that we keep trying to wring out.

I bet you hear the words “busy,” or/and, “tired,” come out their mouths when you ask them how they’re doing.

If they don’t say it, you can see it, or at least detect it. Can you detect it in yourself? It doesn’t belong there if you can.

Once again, our only work is to believe. Believe God can change us, believe God loves us as we are, and believe we don’t even have to perfect our faith. That is Jesus’s job. He is after all called “the pioneer and perfecter of faith” (Hebrews 12:2 NIV, italics added).

The Amplified Bible even goes as far as to describe Jesus’s perfecting of us—calling Him our faith’s finisher. The word says He brings it to “maturity and perfection” (Hebrews 6:1 AMP, italics added).

There is no room for guilt, shame, or condemnation in rest. Let me tell you something about guilt, shame, and condemnation (I’ve just struggled with it this morning, and the Holy Spirit lifted it off of me), it only comes out of an attitude, a heart, of works. It only comes when our own efforts fail, or are frustrated. It all comes out of our works.

God called us to work, not to works.

There is a natural work in the human life. There’s cooking, cleaning, etc., that needs to be done. If you’re on the prayer team at church, or have a God-ordained “job,” then yes, physically you are working. But there should never be a lack of peace inside. When there is, you have started works within.

God’s “jobs” for us are always a delight, and always for our good, and the good of the body. And God is always about balance, not burning yourself out, and not being sluggish or slothful either. Furthermore, I want to point out that “feeling” guilt or shame or condemnation is evil. I’m not calling you evil. I imagine that you’re in Jesus Christ, especially if you’re reading this, thus you are imputed with His righteousness.

I’m calling the act of holding onto (not letting go of) guilt, shame, and condemnation evil. The act is evil—a sin. And the Word of God declares it so. It is either done in an act of unbelief, or pride disguised as holiness. Listen to this,

Let us all come forward and draw near with true (honest and sincere) hearts in unqualified assurance and absolute conviction engendered by faith (by that leaning of the entire human personality on God in absolute trust and confidence in His power, wisdom, and goodness), having our hearts sprinkled and purified from a guilty (evil) conscience and our bodies cleansed with pure water.

— Hebrews 10:22 AMPC

Do you know why guilt is evil? Because it doubts the power of the blood of Jesus to free us from sin. It doubts the overwhelming strength of the mercies and grace of God. It disbelieves His very love.

This is so powerful. This is a reverential truth that will set you free if you believe. The Holy Spirit convicts us, He never condemns us. And God doesn’t condemn man. God condemns man’s sin.

Those who choose to attach themselves to sin, instead of God, through Christ Jesus, have chosen to attach themselves to the thing that God condemns.

God’s heart is good. Jesus has paid the price of sin, and the weight and power of it.

I like what Joyce Meyer says. She says that she believes the power and the weight of sin is guilt, shame, and condemnation.

Hear the words of the Lord through His faithful apostle,

Whereas this One [Christ], after He had offered a single sacrifice for our sins [that shall avail] for all time, sat down at the right hand of God. For by a single offering He has forever completely cleansed and perfected those who are consecrated and made holy.

— Hebrews 10:12 AMPC

Jesus has done it.

I also want to point out to you the word “made.” The Holy Spirit just pointed this out to me (how I love His company and Presence). We can try to make ourselves holy, or we can be made holy.

We are made holy by grace through faith. We are saved by grace through faith. The key word here is grace. Not even faith is the key word. I’ll tell you why: Faith is graced to us.

Isn’t it God who appoints to us the measure of faith (Romans 12:3)? And remember that everything God gives us is a gift (James 1:17 AMPC). Gifts come free.

Isn’t it God who called us through His Holy Spirit to come to Him to receive His grace that we may be saved (see John 6:44)?

If we truly know that we are forgiven completely, accepted fully, and made perfect by Jesus, then we will have peace. And we’ll have something to get excited and stirred up for.

Entering God’s rest is not without the exertion, or perhaps better stated, the exercising of belief. The growing of belief only comes by grace.

To purchase a copy, click here. <3

Let us therefore be zealous and exert ourselves and strive diligently to enter that rest [of God, to know and experience it for ourselves], that no one may fall or perish by the same kind of unbelief and disobedience [into which those in the wilderness fell].

— Hebrews 4:11 AMPC

Once again, the Holy Spirit opened my eyes to something here. If we are trying to do God’s job in us or outside of us by working, our faith will wither away and, as this verse implies, it will “perish by…unbelief.”

Ultimately, working to “help God out” is an act of unbelief and it shows a lack of confidence in Him. The more we practice working, the more we feed unbelief. The more we stray from God. The more hopeless we become that He will ever come through for us.

God works through faith. Indeed, if we are working, thus acting out of unbelief and disobedience to His command to believe, then the power and glory of God that we so desperately want to see in our lives will never manifest. Or it is highly unlikely that it will manifest.

I say that because Saul didn’t believe on Christ Jesus, but Jesus still met him on His way to Damascus. After that encounter, I say, He fully believed on Jesus, or strived after it ardently.

Many Christians who strive, seem to strive not to believe. Or at least they feed their unbelief by rehearsing their doubts, either verbally to others or mentally to themselves. Instead of striving to not believe, strive and fight to believe. Fight the good fight of faith (1 Timothy 6:12 NASB). Lastly, I want to quote a wonderful passage from a book that I’ve found very helpful on my faith journey. In The Book of Healing, John Reynolds writes:

They came to Jesus and said, “What must we do that we might work the works of God?” Jesus said to them, “This is the work of God that you might believe on Him Who He has sent.” They didn’t ask Him what to do to get saved, they asked about doing the works of God. Jesus said, “Believe on Me.”

Jesus has done all that is necessary for us to receive from God. “Father, I have finished the works you gavest me to do.” How many of us are trying to “work the works of God?” Jesus overcame every temptation. “He was tempted in every way as we are, yet without sin, let us therefore come boldly before the throne of grace that we [may] receive mercy and find grace to help.” The throne of what? The throne of GRACE. Stop trying to “work the works.” Stop trying to “work” for your healing, your present. Stop confessing the Scriptures with the attitude of trying to “make” something happen. “For it is the Fathers GOOD pleasure” to give it to you! The price has been paid by Jesus. Go and freely receive from Him based upon His grace.

Yes, it is important to know and quote the scriptures but don’t do it from the “I’m going to make this happen” attitude but rather from a heart attitude of “Father, I thank you for what Jesus did for me at Calvary when he bore my sickness and carried my pain. Father, I ask you to heal my body based on your grace and I thank you for it now in Jesus’s name.” Then just give thanks that your prayers have been heard and answered and act your faith.[

Our fight in life is simply this: to believe on the One God has sent. And belief, faith itself, grows best in rest.



[i] John Reynolds, The Book of Healing: How to Receive Healing from the Lord Jesus Christ (John Reynold Ministries, 2012), 44. Scripture references from John 6:28–29; Luke 12:32, version unknown. PDF available at http://www.thehealingministry.com/.

And Then He Kissed Me and Told Me That He Loved Me

It had been a full week, packed with blessings, and I needed a break. The blessings of Daddy God were overtaking me and following me everywhere I went, yet in the midst of the bustling of everyday life I longed for a restful therapeutic evening alone with Him.


“I know what you want.” The still whisper in my spirit sounded like a kiss to my heart.

“I want a date night with You,” I breathed, and made some warm black tea with vanilla cream and honey.

My feet felt every thread of carpet that blanketed the wooden floors. Making my way to my room I closed the sandy drapes for an intimate dimming effect. Snuggling the pillows I sat down on my bed and started up a movie.

“Jesus,” I called longingly, “I’m here waiting.”

“So am I.”

There You were before me, eyes rich with oceans of love, yet gently warm like the crackling of a small fire. You sat next to me on the bed and rubbed my back before cradling me in Your arms. I laid my legs across Your legs and rested my head on Your chest.

“My beautiful sister, friend, and beloved bride,” You spoke, feeding my heart with words of life and encouragement.

Your rich tone changed, and I knewYou were talking to my soul, going deeper into the depths of me. “Sshhh, shh,shh. Peace…be still. I lead you beside the still, quiet, restful waters. I restore you, I’ve lead you in the paths of righteousness. Peace I leave with you. Receive it, I’ve given it and want you to have it. It delights my heart to do you good, to see you happy, whole, restful…peaceful. Let my Spirit flow to you…”

I shifted and You squeezed me tenderly, “Open up beloved, allow Me to flow my life into you…sozo you…and make you well.”

I melted into your arms and my body conformed in yours, spilling over You like water over river rocks. I breathed deeply of the scents in the fabric of your shirt and allowed the Holy Spirit to flow into me. A loving mist overshadowed me, and then rivers of life began to flow in every unhealed part of my emotions, memory, and understanding.

I sighed, my breath a tremble. My lips quivered and You secured me more tightly.

“You know…some of my brethren think it’s harder to fight…but I say it is harder to rest. To trust yourself entirely to another. To allow Me to protect you. To allow Me to love you unconditionally from start to finish. It takes more strength to relax…and this cannot be done by will power. It’s something you have to allow my Spirit to do in you and for you. It’s another area of surrender.”

I shifted again and mentally decided to go limp in your arms but You read through it.

“Your body is relaxed…but how is your heart?”

I didn’t answer. Feeling within myself, I sensed some walls remained up in fear.

“I love you perfectly. I will always love you perfectly…perfectly and completely. Please…let my love in, and all walls of fear will come down, for my perfect love casts out all fear. Let Me protect you. Let Me make your soul feel safe and sound. I want so badly for you to receive my blessings, beloved…even more than you are. Rest with Me. Stay with Me,” You pressed Your cheek against mine.

“Let Me love you to life, give you my hope that does not disappoint, fulfill your dreams. I want to do these things beloved. I want to bless you immeasurably. Your only job is to trust Me by resting in my love, my promises, my finished work on the cross, and even that is done by the Spirit. I love to be good to you. I only want to be good to you.”


P.S: I wrote this devotional from a date experience with Jesus, weeks after my faith trek to Colorado for Charis Bible College. It would be the longest time that I had ever been away from my family and California. Little did I know how deeply Jesus would enrich my life with wonderful friendships, marriage, a baby and miracles. My first year at Bible college was like living in a blissful dream…where all my needs were met by my Heavenly Father and where the beauty of my surroundings captivated my heart. 

This devotional was taken from my recently published book Visions of Celestial Love. You can purchase a copy by clicking here.