Category: Jesus in Disguise

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Jesus Weeps with You Healing Through Loss

.-This snippet is from the revised version of my book, Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul. In this chapter, I lovingly engage the narrative behind the “sovereignty of God” teaching that once crippled my faith by incriminating the goodness of God when it came to healing. I hope this snippet helps build your faith, comforts the hurting places in your heart and helps you trust in your heavenly Father’s heart toward you. Jesus came to heal, and it is God’s will that we have abundant life.

Chapter 8: The Accuser

..Jesus smiled with pleasure at my decision to trust his word. He explained, “My love, the adversary has no grounds to accuse you before our Father, because my blood has purified the heavenly holy of holies. I forever sit as your High Priest in heaven. Your right standing with our Father is as secure as mine as long as you never reject me.

“Wow,” I breathed, feeling as if I were inhaling air fragrant with grace.

“As well, Father is not displeased with you. He is not angry with you in the slightest. He has promised never to be incensed against you. He has promised never to rebuke you.[i] This is the Gospel of Peace Isaiah prophesied about. Our Father delights in you and he rejoices over you. You are his well-beloved child.”

I smiled without knowing, “amen” I whispered, feeling at a loss of anything more to say. All I wanted to do was continue to listen to Jesus and be healed by his words.

“Even though the Accuser cannot slander you before our Father, he can still whisper lies to you about Him. He has falsely accused the Father to you for months now. He’s used almost every hardship that you’ve experienced as an opportunity to blaspheme God in your ears. The incorrect way that you see the Father now has not just been a result of your own conclusions.”

***

Without warning, my emotions were thrust back to eight months prior when one of my dearest childhood friends, Cassie, passed away forty-eight hours after a terrible car accident. I had rushed to the ECU to see her, praying hard the whole way in the car. I remember struggling to see through my tears as I drove and cried out for God to heal her.

I was let into the hospital room with her family and together we prayed, hugged, sobbed, and anxiously waited, hoping she would wake up. When the heart monitor flat lined, I felt like my own heart had stopped. We all watched with held breath as more doctors rushed in after a small emergency alarm rang. They tried and failed to revive her. When the head doctor finally dropped the defibrillator and turned toward us with sad eyes, I broke down. A flood of wails erupted in the room as Cassie’s family cried loudly.

In that moment of hopelessness and heartbreak, I remembered hearing an evil being whispering in my mind. It told me that God wanted my friend to die and that’s why my prayers hadn’t been answered. It told me, God needed another, “flower in his garden in heaven,” so he took her. It told me that perhaps if I was a better Christian, God would have reconsidered and healed Cassie. A chilly sensation had run through my heart that day. The words of the enemy successfully broke a tender place in my soul and formed a bleeding rift in the area of my trust in God’s goodness.

***

The memory opened up my hidden wound afresh and I bowed my head as heavy sorrow weighed on me.

Jesus read my thoughts and asked, “do you think it was God’s will that Cassie died by a drunk driver?”

I shut my eyes tightly as the fresh inner wound of Cassie’s tragic death opened. Fast tears formed before slipping down my cheeks, “I don’t know,” I said brokenly even though I knew I believed it had been God’s will.

“It wasn’t,” Jesus said, his eyes flooding with pained compassion.

“But how can that be? I thought God’s will was always done?” I said with a small frown of confusion.

“Sadly, not always. The Word of God says, God wills that none should perish but that all should come to repentance.[ii] Tragically, people perish every day even though God paid the ultimate price for everyone to be saved. When my disciples asked me to teach them how to pray, I told them to pray for God’s kingdom to come and for his will to be done on earth as it is in heaven.[iii] The fact that I told them to pray for God’s will to be done on earth implies that his will is not always done.”

Jesus continued, “My dear if our Father’s will was always done, earth would look just like Eden, and everyone would have a life-giving relationship with God. My earthly ministry alleviated human suffering by destroying the works of the devil through preaching the truth of the Gospel to the poor, through healing the sick, binding up the broken hearted, casting out devils, raising the dead, and ministering to the needs of people.[iv] God’s will came to earth from heaven in every miracle his Holy Spirit performed through me. For the Spirit of the Lord was upon me to do all those things.[v] With every blind eye opened, with every hungry belly filled, with every crippled man leaping for joy, with every truth spoken, and every disease healed, people saw God and often praised him afterward. I only did what I saw my Father doing.[vi]

“This is beautiful news,” I said as a cleansing flow of cool tears spilled from my eyes and slipped down my cheeks. Jesus smiled tenderly at me and softly held my chin with his thumb and pointer finger. For a moment, he watched my tears fall as if they were precious gemstones. I remembered the scripture that said God collected the tears of his children in a bottle and that he recorded each one in his book.[vii]

After a few seconds of only our eyes speaking, he gently released his hand from my chin and continued sharing the good news. “My ministry on earth is the clearest picture mankind has of the heart of God. His heart is good. He does not delight in human suffering. I always obeyed his command to love and to declare truth. If you’ve seen me, you’ve seen the Father.[viii] I and my Father are one.[ix] And no one who denies me truly knows God for I was with God in the beginning.[x] I am Truth, I am the Word made flesh.[xi] My dear, God is love.[xii] He so loved the world that he sent me.[xiii] All true goodness originates with him.”

His healing words broke through a dam of religious lies and self-protection in my heart releasing a fresh pool of tears. My eyes welled before the assembling tears began dripping down my chin and wetting my sleeves.

Moved by great love, Jesus gently wiped them away even as his eyes misted with deep consoling compassion. He inched his face closer to mine until all I could see was his radiant face. His visage was pouring with beautiful love. “Noelani, God wanted to heal Cassie and comfort you and her family, like I did at Lazarus’s tomb when I came as the resurrection and raised him from the dead.[xiv] God wept with you as I wept with Mary and Martha. He felt your pain, as well as his own.”

I shut my eyes to flush them of the tears that began blinding my vision. When I began to turn to look away, Jesus softly cupped my face still and I allowed my face to rest in his hands. As I did, I felt peace behind the surface of his fingertips. Jesus tenderly stroked my eyelids with his thumbs and to my surprise, I didn’t flinch away. Normally, I had a natural reaction to protect my eyes from anything that would touch them because of how sensitive and crucial they were to body and well-being. But when Jesus touched my eyelids, I felt no need to self-protect. This soothing motion of his thumbs melted me. It was like he was blessing me with clearer spiritual vision. He spoke again and I felt his balmy breath on my nose. His words washed over me like a warm mineral pool.

“Healing is my Father’s will for his kids, it is part of the atonement. Healing is the children’s bread.”[xv]

I felt a stony weight lift from my chest and my breathing became more relaxed as the truth came in. A place in my mind felt disencumbered.

Jesus released his hands from my face, and I looked upon him like someone who woke up to see sunshine for the first time after hibernating through the winter.

For the first time in a year, I felt a sense of peace come into the pained place that ached for Cassie’s presence. I smiled without effort at Jesus.

-To delve more deeply, check out the unrevised version of Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul, by clicking here.

“Ashley depicts such a level of intimacy with Jesus so poignantly that I believe it will arouse others’ hearts with passion to pursue a new depth and commitment in their relationship with Him. I pray with all my heart that through her insights seamlessly woven into the stories, the church (men and women) would recognize their one true identity as brides and not servants. The author helps us learn to allow ourselves be loved and healed and no longer driven to meet unrealistic expectations of ourselves and others. I believe that Ashley’s book will facilitate cultivating a fulfilling relationship with Jesus and abandoning religion once and for all! Ashley gives hope to those of us who feel or have felt they have sunk too low in their depravity. She demonstrates and enables us to believe that, no matter how vile our pasts, we can be washed white as snow by the blood of the Lamb and made beautiful new creations. She conveys with a refreshing rawness that nothing is beyond His power and (most reassuringly) His desire to redeem and restore. She illustrates the amazing grace of God with its power to enable us to live holy lives by His spirit and not the letter of the law and religion.
Possibly the most pertinent lesson that Ashley wisely shares in some of her stories is the most painful yet wonderful journey we go through if we choose to face the surrender of our lives and desires to God. Through her writing she gently urges us to come to this place of trust with the Father who loves us beyond our comprehension. The stories are heartwarmingly honest. Ashley has a beautiful gift of using descriptive language which instantly creates pictures in your minds as she relates her stories and makes them so real and alive.
May it lead you into your own passionate journey deeper into the heart of Jesus and to experience wonderful encounters with Him, our eternally faithful and true love.” ~Celina Haywood, Licensed Minister, Former Missionary to Thailand, Beautiful Encourager 💗

Scripture references from this snippet:

[i] Isaiah 54:9

[ii] 2 Peter 3:9

[iii] Matthew 6:10

[iv] Acts 10:38

[v] Luke 4:18

[vi] John 5:19

[vii] Psalm 56:8

[viii] John 14:9

[ix] John 10:30

[x] 1 John 2:23, John 1:2

[xi] John 1:14, John 14:6

[xii] 1 John 4:8

[xiii] John 3:16

[xiv] John 11:25

[xv] Matthew 15:22-28, John 6:32-35

-For an amazing Biblical teaching on the Sovereignty of God by Andrew Wommack, click here.

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Falling in Love with Jesus

Have you ever thought about this, the Bible begins with a marriage relationship in a beautiful garden between Adam and Eve, and it ends with a divine marriage feast in Heaven between Christ and the church?

This is a glimmering preview into a new book idea I’ve had in my heart for several years now. This book is about preparing the hearts of God’s people for the Marriage Supper of the Lamb (Revelation 19:7). It is a prayerful and worshipful journey of mine to create words that make others thirsty for Jesus and to fall in love with Him. I often pray that the Holy Spirit would use me to woo the Bride of Christ back to Jesus. Just as the Spirit of God helped John the Baptist turn the hearts of the children back to their fathers, may He rise up within my heart to help the Bride of Christ return to her First Love. May you be blessed by this sneak peek:

-This book is artistically based off the Biblical writings of: Songs of Songs, Isaiah 54, Esther, Eden, Ezekiel 16, and finally the Marriage between Jesus and the Church in Revelation.

Eden scene:

“How come the King makes it so I am always attended?” I asked my attending angel.

“Because you are his royal wife.”

“We are not married yet.”

“In your carnal mind time still exists.” He said without condemnation or rudeness, “You forget that the Word says the Lamb was slain before the foundation of the world.  Before Adam sinned in this Paradise, Christ had already become the sin offering.” (Revelation 13:8)

I (Ariel, name meaning, Jerusalem) remembered that God symbolically showed Adam and Eve the promise of his eternal redemption through Christ when He slaid an animal to cover them with its skin. He covered their shame. He paid for their sin. He kept them warm…all with that one act to show them divine grace, mercy and sacrificial love. But it came at an ugly cost…the cost of innocent blood. (Genesis 3:21)

“It doesn’t seem like death could have ever happened in such a beautiful place as this…” I whispered thoughtfully.

The garden was vibrant with flowers and fruit and vegetables bright like polychromatic gems. Sparkling mist rose from the foundations of Eden like clouds of cream. The etherealness of it reminded me of the slow dancing clouds that descend like steaming, gauzy sheets of vapor over the amazon rainforests.

The rivers of Eden could be heard everywhere. The sound of moving water pleasantly rushed around my ears as if I were canoeing on streams with the clearest crystal waters fresher than artic rivers. One river had flecks of gold chaffing so plentiful that the gold clustered smoothly on river stones and when aureate sunlight graced the waters it gleamed so brilliantly it was like light on mirrors, refracting the brightest yellow.

I knelt by this heavenly river, feeling the soft, moist turf cushioning my knees. As I cupped this water in my hand, fine gold settled to the bottom of my palms like light glitter floating in water and it covered my skin completely like a layer of metallic lotion after the water had dripped from my hands. (Genesis 2:10-14)

All of the animals glowed like moonlight. They seemed to be infused with an otherworldly presence…as if divinity had been sewed into the delicate weaving ladder of their DNA. They were full of life. Holy life. They were full of peace. They never harmed one another. They lived in harmony with the earth and all of creation around them. Even through them, I saw Him. (Romans 8:20-23, Isaiah 11:6-9)

He was inescapable…

Even when He went off to judge, to reign, to deliver, to conquer and to rule as the mighty King of kings, and Lord of lords …He was always still with me. (Matthew 28:20, 1 Corinthians 6: 19-20)

In my own heart, I tasted the fragrance of his pure presence. His loving faithfulness was transcendent. Not even death could overpower or diminish it. (2 Corinthians 2:15)

It was like I was in a dream. Or a dream of a dream. But at the same time, no fantasy or dream, could come close to matching the beauty of Paradise. Undefiled, unadulterated…Eden. The highest hopes of man paled in comparison to the dreams of God.

In some ways, I felt like Esther, living within the gilded fortress and walls of the king’s magnificent palace, and his subsequent beautiful mansions speckling around his main palace. Within this main gate was his royal court made of pearl floors almost as clear as glass with thick curvy pillars crested and belted with rose gold that flamed into an amber color when torchlight came near.

All of this was encircled with water and delightful gardens rich with life, fruit, exotic animals, jewels, and every good delight known to man. Between two of these gardens was the king’s lush vineyard where grapes more aromatic than flowers grew in iridescent rows of emerald leafy vines….

The [Holy] Spirit and the bride (the church, believers) say, “Come.” And let the one who hears say, “Come.” And let the one who is thirsty come; let the one who wishes take and drink the water of life without cost. -Revelation 22:17 AMP

For previous books on the amazing love of Jesus, check out, Visions of Celestial Love and Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul. 

"Ashley Thompson’s book, Visions of Celestial Love is just that, a visionary work of epic proportions. It is glimpses into a loving and remarkable relationship with the creator of the universe. You are invited to Dive into stories of love and compassion, healing and provision, loss and recovery, profound grace and faith. Ashley draws us in with her descriptive prose and unique style of writing. There are so many stories to relate to in this book and I’m sure you will find your own story among the many that are told here. So, find your favorite spot, your favorite beverage, and curl up with “Visions of Celestial Love”!" -Amazon Reviewer
"Romantic Rendezvous is a beautiful invitation into intimacy with Jesus! Ashley has done a masterful job of creating stories that depict the heart of the Father. I have truly been blessed by this book! As I read each story, I felt the closeness of Jesus and had continual reminders of how deep the Fathers love is for me. From the very first chapter, I felt the flame of my heart be rekindled with God's goodness and love. This book is a must read!" -Amazon Reviewer

Worship Him

He’s so beautiful, isn’t He? Look at Him, the desire of the nations. The world trembles for his presence again. (I don’t own any rights to this beautiful music or video):

Beauty – Bethel Music – YouTube

xoxo

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Royal Righteousness to Replace Shame

This testimony is shared in the revised version of my book, Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul. To read the original version, click here.

But YOU will be called the priests of the LORD; they will speak of you as ministers of our God; you will feed on the wealth of nations, and you will boast in their riches. In place of your shame, you will have a double portion; in place of disgrace, they will rejoice over their share. So they will possess double in their land, and eternal joy will be theirs. -Isaiah 61:6-7 (emphasis mine)

I have found that shame was the number one tool the devil used to keep me in bondage throughout my early Christian walk. During one of my first visits to Charis Bible College, the Father gave me a vision of myself. One of the worship leaders began keying what sounded like a spontaneous worship song on the stage piano. She created melodic and beautiful music on the keys.

Within seconds I saw a vision of myself kneeling on a still, watery floor. The water was so calm it appeared like glass. I was robed in a dark shirt and pants. Jesus began walking toward me to embrace me. Instead of receiving his love, I turned my face away and held out my hands as if pushing the air to discourage him from seeing me.

“No, no!” I cried. “Stay away from me.”

 I closed my eyes tightly until he “left.” I didn’t think of myself as worthy enough to look at him. Being a gentleman, he walked away (although he never truly left). When I opened my eyes again and didn’t see him. I began to feel lonely and I regretted pushing him away.

Before I could cry because of my poor decision, my black clothes began to transform into a beautiful pink dress with twinkling lights that moved. After I saw that I was more prettily donned, I felt worthier and my heart began to desire to see Jesus.

As if the water below me heard the silent language of my heart, it began to rise in large drops. It was like reverse rain. Large drops of water solidified and formed a spiral staircase that had the appearance of precious stone. The stairway led up to the heavens, beyond the starry dome ceiling. As I gazed up, I saw billions upon billions of stars. They twinkled and shimmered like silver, blue, green, gold and purple glitter refracting light. Star dust painted the sky like aurora lights and cosmic clouds.

Unconsciously, I knew the stairway would lead me to God. It was like Jacob’s ladder in a way. I began to ascend the stairs but before I could reach the top, Jesus reappeared. This time, I didn’t turn him away, because he had dealt with my shame by clothing me in a gown of royal righteousness.

I also believe he appeared before I could reach the top because he wanted to show me that I didn’t have to labor for intimacy. He didn’t want me to. He wanted to show me that he was always wanting connection with me.

And that he was the only way to the Father, who lived up the stairs…

In the same way, I pray Jesus shows you a picture of yourself clothed with royal righteousness. You are a child of God. Thus, you are royalty. You don’t ever have to earn your way to God because Jesus paid the ultimate price for the veil to be torn that separated you from God. The work is already finished. You are perfectly loved by God. Your body has been made into the temple of the Holy Spirit. Christ, the Lord lives in your heart by faith. All your sins have been washed away. You have no stains. You are a new creation in Christ and you have been given a righteous nature.

“Yet now he has reconciled you to himself through the death of Christ in his physical body. As a result, he has brought you into his own presence, and you are holy and blameless as you stand before him without a single fault.” -Colossians 1:22

Reflection Questions:

  1. Are you dealing with any level of shame in your life? If yes, why?
  2. Are you currently struggling with faith righteousness? In what ways have you personally allowed Jesus to show you that you are the righteousness of God through him (not by your works but his finished work)? “For it is by graceyou have been saved,through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—not by works,so that no one can boast.” (Ephesians 2:8–9 NIV) “This righteousness is given through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference between Jew and Gentile.” (Romans 3:22 NIV) Look up 2 Corinthians 5:21.
  3. Would you describe yourself as more God-reliant or self-reliant?

“This book is simply wonderful. Deliciously descriptive, it nourishes the soul with fresh revelation of God’s love for humanity. This collection of short stories may challenge your thinking about what true intimacy looks like, while making your heart yearn to daily experience the Perfect Love described within its pages. It invites you into a world created by Love Himself, where there’s no mistaking that His love is not only unconditional and never-failing, but also deeply personal and precious to Him. Get ready to experience the purpose, pleasure, and power of real love!” -Amazon Reviewer

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Love is the Greatest

~I wrote this scene in the revised version of my book, Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul, to honor the woman who has loved me like a spiritual mother. She is a living display of God’s unconditional love and grace in the lives of others. And I truly believe the words that I wrote in this scene were inspired and reflect a small sample of God’s love and delight in her. Enjoy!

Chapter 12

“For who is greater? He who is reclining (at meat), or he who is ministering? Is it not he who is reclining (at meat)? And I — I am in your midst as he who is ministering.” —Luke 22:27 YLT

Angel began saying grace. “Heavenly Father, thank you for this meal that we are about to receive. We pray that it will bring nourishment to our bodies. God, we ask that as we eat and converse that our speech will be pleasing to you. Let it be like Christ is in the midst of us, edifying us all with his presence, truth, and love. We love you Father, and we thank you for all of our blessings. I ask that you especially bless this young man who came so quickly to our aid this morning and offered to fix our pipes for free. Multiply the goodness that he has shown us back to him a hundred-fold. In Jesus’ name. Amen.”

“Amen,” Jesus said, and I echoed the same.

Angel lifted a spoonful of fish to her mouth.

I broke off a piece of bread and nibbled on it.

“You remember Daniel?” Jesus asked Angel.

“Daniel…the prophet?” Angel asked slowly between bites.

“Yes, him.”

“I remember certain things about him, yes,” she chuckled nervously. “This isn’t a Bible quiz or anything like that is it?”

“Oh no. No quiz.”

Angel swallowed. “Okay, good. What about Daniel?”

“He was called greatly beloved of God by the angel who was carrying a message for him.”[i]

Angel nodded and took up another bite of fish. Her facial expression lifted with pleasure as the taste of fish touched her palate.

“You were right,” she said and sucked wet fish sauce off her fingers. “The sumac adds something special to the boiled fish. It’s perfect.”

“I’m glad you like it,” Jesus said, and then cleared his throat before continuing on. “The angel told him that God heard him the first time he asked for the message, even though it was delayed in coming.”

Once again, Angel nodded.

“Angel,” Jesus said, turning toward her intently, “your prayers are so valued by our Father that even before you ask, he answers them. He anticipates the desires of your heart and he moves to act on your behalf.”

Angel stopped chewing and her eyes locked on Jesus’ face.

Jesus didn’t delay but continued unabashed, “Your heart is the home of his Son. You are his temple, his daughter. When you ask for something, you have the power to persuade his heart, simply because of his great love for you and because your desires are pure. You have served him well by washing the feet of his children. As I said earlier, you are pretty famous in the Father’s house.”

Angel stiffened and I couldn’t read her face because her back was turned to me. Before long, I noticed the quivering of her shoulders, and soon I heard a soft cry. Her glasses fogged up and she removed them from the bridge of her nose, which was lightly speckled with cinnamon brown freckles. She shakily wiped at her lenses with the edge of her robe.

“I would ask you how you know these things. Are you a prophet?”

“No,” Jesus said with an endearing smile on his face. “You know that’s not true. You knew who I was when you let me in your house. Don’t give in to the doubts that block out your child-like faith.”

Angel’s hands stilled. She let her glasses lay in her lap before wiping away the tears gathering in her chestnut brown eyes.

“You know me really well,” Jesus said, and took hold of one of her hands. Their bronze complexions almost matched, except her skin was more darkly hued. He folded his hand over hers and stroked the surface of her hand with his thumb. Angel covered her mouth with her free hand to stifle her cries.

I was beginning to think Jesus had this effect on everyone.

After several minutes of trying to compose herself, Angel managed a low mutter. “Lord?” She looked him up and down before her eyes shifted over his face. “Is it really you?”

“Yes,” Jesus said, his smile bright. “Earlier, you prayed that I would be in your midst…I Am.”[ii]

Angel took his hand up and kissed his fingers reverently before pushing her chair back. It made a scraping noise. She moved to bow at his feet. Surprisingly he let her and with one hand he made a smooth stroke of her hair. She pressed her forehead to the cold sand-tan tile and her hot tears fell.

Jesus’ visage shone down upon her and then he looked upon me, “She is one of those who wears an invisible crown on her head. For when I was hungry she fed me, when I was thirsty she gave me something to drink, when I was a stranger she invited me in, when I needed clothes she clothed me, when I was sick she looked after me, and when I was in prison she visited me.[iii] She did all of this by loving on others in my name and trusting me to be her strength.”  

Angel’s clothing altered and I saw that she was in a pure white dress fit for a queenly bride. The multiple skirts of her gown had whimsical layers. Each layer had a unique glory of its own—almost as if they represented different seasons in her walk with Jesus. I tried to count the airy folds, but they were too many. Tiny flakes of melted white gold glimmered in her gown. A sash, the gossamer color of golden beryl, was draped across her right shoulder and curved left to her waist. It was beatific.

An equal colorful crown rested on her nutmeg brown hair. She had a single gold chain tied around her neck, which hung like a huge tear drop. Inside the tear drop was a sapphire blue gem, the reflective color of the heavens.

From within her belly, I saw what appeared like rivers of water coursing in circles. It was living water with life in itself. It was building in speed and mass. Prompted and inspired by the Holy Spirit within her, Angel began to sing in tongues—it was the most beautiful song. I felt goosebumps break out on my legs and arms as I realized that she was worshipping in Spirit and in truth. As her heavenly language poured forth from her lips, the blue gemstone necklace began to radiate and I saw the rivers of Spirit water begin to flow from her body.

After clasping Jesus’ ankles and kissing his feet, she bent her head back to look up at him.

He cupped her face and kissed her forehead, “Arise, my beloved, my dove, my fair one.”[iv] He released her face, took hold of her by the elbows, and helped her to her feet. She retrieved her specks from the chair and sat down.

When she moved to brush off an airy piece of chair fabric lint from her glasses, I noticed she was blind to the spiritual frock she was clothed in. I wondered why it was masked from her vision, but seen by me?

I wanted her to know how spotlessly adorned she really was, but when I caught sight of Jesus I knew that my questions could wait.

“I’ve sat at this kitchen table with you many times, Angel, and I’ve enjoyed every second that you’ve sought my face. Not one minute has ever gone to waste or been unnoticed.”

“I always knew you were with me, even if I couldn’t sense it.”

Or see it, I thought.

“Truly, you have given my heart much pleasure and you’ve ministered to me many times through your surrender and purity.”

The chai began to boil and then foam in the pot on the stove. Tiny milky bronze bubbles started to rise, permeating the air with sweet and spicy aroma. I stood and hastily made my way to the stove to turn off the burner before the tea boiled over.

I retrieved two café au lait mugs made of smooth green ceramic before pouring Angel and Jesus a cup.

My hands began trembling as I made my way back to the table. I set their tea down beside them, grateful that I hadn’t spilled it.

There was a holy weight in the air. My knees felt a little heavy as I went back in the heart of the kitchen to get myself a cup.

Angel was beaming and she couldn’t even see it.

I managed to pour myself some of the fragrant tea without spilling. When I neared my chair, I almost buckled into it. I let my head rest in my hand and chose to enjoy the presence of the Holy Spirit, who was filling the room.

It felt like a river was lapping at my feet, but when I glanced down, all I saw was the tile flooring.

My thoughts drifted like autumn leaves to the scriptures in First Kings that spoke of the dedication of the temple. I remembered that the cloud of God’s presence filled the chambers, so the priests couldn’t even stand to minister, for the glory of the Lord diffused the very air.[v]

Indeed, Angel was truly a priest unto God, living out a seemingly plain life that was drenched with charitable deeds. She was known by her goodness and generosity to many.

“Do you smell that? The smoke?” Jesus asked her.

Angel glanced up, as did I, to find that we were all inside a cloud. She took a long inhale and slowly released air.

She nodded, clearly liking the aroma.

“It’s all your good deeds. These have risen to the Father as a holy, sweet incense. It is more pleasing to him than you understand.” Jesus’ warm eyes glimmered. “Angel, you have tapped into a tender part of our Father’s heart. You have discovered that love is the most excellent way.[vi]

“Indeed, while some have sought the miraculous and searched for signs, you have sought the most valuable thing—the love of God. And in doing so, you have really sought God, for he is love.[vii] Truly, where miracles and wonders cannot change the hearts of men, take Israel in the desert for example, consistent godly love can.

“Love never fails. It has the power to do what miracles cannot. It transforms the heart. It opens up the hearts of men to see me and my Father as we are. Therefore, it softens and enriches the soils of people’s hearts to receive grace and truth by faith…and thus live. Your love has opened the hearts of many to receive the seed of my Word.

“Love is the purest catalyst for miracles and the reason behind every miracle I ever performed. Your lifestyle of good deeds points back to the Father’s heart and many cannot deny he exists, because of your example.

“And while miracles are important, and many of my brothers have disregarded the precious gift of healing that I died for, you have found the way that fulfills all the law and the prophets.

“What you have done in Noelani’s life and the life of many of my people will never go unrewarded. You have surely been a priest by serving my people and reflecting me to them.”

Overcome now, Angel buried her face in her hands. She sobbed and laughed simultaneously.

[i] Daniel 10:11

[ii] John 18:6

[iii] Matthew 25:35-36

[iv] Song of Solomon 2:10

[v] 1 Kings 8:10–12

[vi] 1 Corinthians 12:27-13:1-13

[vii] 1 John 4:7

To check out the original version of, Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul, click here.

“This book is filled with amazing love stories. These stories bring hope to the deepest part of your heart and soul. The writer keeps you engaged so much that it’s as if you are there experiencing the emotions and feelings of the characters. Your heart will race. Your heart will flutter. You’ll feel the presence of the king. You’ll find yourself falling more and more in love with Jesus as you realize and experience the unending love he has for you.

If you’re struggling with your relationship with Jesus, this book is for you.

If you are grounded and solid in your relation with Jesus, this book is for you.

If you want to know him … it’s for you. If you are seeking love ….start here.” –Pastor Irene Torres, Marriage and Family pastor at Our Father’s House church. Irene carries a powerful testimony of family restoration and transformation. Her passion is to help families build strong and healthy relationships that prosper in unity. Irene carries a gifting to help others see God’s glory inside themselves so they too can rise up and live to bring God glory. Irene has a Bachelors in Christian Leadership and a Masters in Governmental Development.

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Coffee House Ministry

~This snippet is taken from my book, Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul:

“What makes your beloved better than any other?
What is it about him…?” – Jerusalem Maiden, Brides-to-Be

—Song of Songs 5:9b TPT

Vaporous spicy aromas licked the air with heat. Warm ginger mingled with clove. Pine kissed ground coffee scents. Chai danced with vanilla. And nutmeg blended with buttery pear creating a bath of incense. A group of teenagers sat on a plush, ruby red sofa drinking piquant drinks from decorative mugs. They shared headphones and watched videos on their laptops, which were resting on their legs. An old couple sharing a booth, sat across from one another talking. The wife reached a pale, trembling hand over her husband’s tan, leathery one. His opaque eyes misted as he looked upon her, and I felt his ripe love for her like hot honey in my chest. Some young adults were seated around a wooden oval table doing homework. I guessed they were all a part of a study group. Still there were others scattered about. I passed by a small girl with pigtails happily eating a lemon tart dessert.

When Jesus walked in, I expected him to stand on a table and evangelize. Instead, he walked right up to the counter to greet a comely barista. Her thick, brown hair was weaved in the back and hung like glossy rope with tawny blonde highlights. She had clear green eyes like olive oil and lips the color of crushed raspberries.

“Good evening, sir. How may I help you?” she asked perfunctorily.

She looked frazzled and her day must have been long, for although she looked at Jesus, she didn’t see him. He was just another customer. It was almost as if her pretty eyes were shuttered by the repetitive routine of work. She glanced at me and asked the same question before her eyes fell to the cash register, ready to proceed with her normal protocol.

I ordered an apple spice tea with sweet buttercream drizzle. “Good choice,” she said without feeling.

Jesus remained silent for a few seconds. His eyes scanned her as she stared at the cash register waiting for him to order next. She glanced up at him when he said nothing.

“What would you recommend, Diane?” he asked, with deeply compassionate eyes and a warm smile. I knew he asked that question only to rouse her.

Her eyes quickened slightly, and her shoulders perked up. “That depends. How are you feeling?”

Jesus answered with a bright smile, “I’m feeling like I could use something with a kick of zest in it.”

The corners of Diane’s lips slightly lifted at his charming and welcoming visage. “We have pineapple tea with ginger root. That usually provides a nice kick.”

“That sounds good, but I’d like to hear other options.”

Diane began to read off to Jesus a list of other teas and coffees that were energy boosters. She went through the entire list before he asked, “Which ones are your favorites? For those nights where you need a booster?”

Diane chortled softly. “It would be the spiked cider or the whiskey Irish creamed coffee,” she said with a mischievous sparkle in her eyes. “But if you’re looking for a nonalcoholic solution, I’d recommend the hot chocolate supreme. It has a few shots of caffeine.”

By this time my tea was finished, and I picked up my order before finding a nearby table. I knew Jesus was ministering to Diane.

“What if I didn’t want anything with alcohol or caffeine in it?” Jesus asked, his demeanor still warm.

“Then the pineapple ginger is your best bet, but you can choose from these other teas,” she said fingering a few, her eyes fixed on the list. “Like I said it really just depends on how you feel.”

“How do you feel?” Jesus asked her.

His question surprised her, and I noted a flicker of shock cross her face before she masked it with her customary employee visage.

“I feel like I could use a booster myself,” she said politely.

“I know a booster that you can’t get in a tea or a coffee or anything material but it always works. And I’d like to give it to you if you’re willing.”

Her eyebrows lifted. “It always works?”

Jesus gave a gentle laugh. “It hasn’t failed yet. Millions of people who’ve had this would tell you so, from centuries ago to modern day, from all around the world to right in this city.”

“How much is it?”

“It’s completely free.”

Diane’s eyebrows creased slightly, and she tilted her head trying to discern Jesus. Nothing but waves of love came off him. She glimpsed around. Everyone had been served, and her fellow co-worker had gone into the kitchen.

“What is it?” she asked, partly suspicious.

“Not what, but who.”

Misunderstanding his intent, Diane stated, “I have a boyfriend.”

Jesus nodded. “I know you do, and I’m not coming onto you if that’s what you’re thinking…at least not in that way.”

Diane pressed her lips together. “Then…?”

“It’s Jesus.”

Diane rolled her eyes. “Please, sir, I’ve had enough of religious jargon. And I’m too old to believe or be humored by fairy tales.”

“I would disagree,” Jesus said kindly.

“What would you like to drink?” Diane asked, cutting him off.

“Humor me for a moment, Diane.”

Diane gave an audible sigh and then shrugged. She stared him up and down again before her demeanor softened. “Okay,” she said cautiously.

“I don’t doubt that you’ve had enough of religious jargon. I’ve had enough of it myself. But I do question whether or not you’re being truthful about fairy tales.”

Diane arched an eyebrow at him and crossed her arms.

Jesus continued, “Think of it. Most movies are composed of fairy tales, even the action ones. There’s some level of magic in them—of superhuman strength, of beauty, of endurance, of ideal romance, of triumph and adventure beyond common life. Most songs consist of a yearning for superhuman love. Many best-selling books are littered with these noble ideas that are often fleeting in human experience, yet they are an ever-constant source of ache and desire in the human heart.”

Diane’s lips untightened and her arms slowly uncrossed.

Jesus expounded, “If those aren’t fairy tales, then I don’t know what is. Every human heart longs to experience something more than the dreariness of life. That’s why people stuff themselves with fancies, be it food, relationships, temporary thrills like theme parks, drugs, movies, vacations, promotions, possessions, whatever it be. The soul of man knows there’s something more that it was created for, and so most people numb this yearning by stuffing it with entertainment. The only problem is,” he paused, and his eyes deepened; “Is that they’re trying to fill an eternal ache with temporary things. Worldly things can never mask heavenly desire. Many have tried, and all of them have failed. Do you not find yourself entertained by these things, Diane?”

When Diane didn’t answer, Jesus replied, “I know you do.” His tone was thick with bowls of compassion that rose like sweet fragrance.

“Well, religious people entertain themselves with rules and criticizing others. At least ‘secular’ people seek happiness over hate,” Diane retorted. Although her facial expression was defiant, her voice was strained, and I caught a glimpse of sorrow in her eyes before she drew it back.

Jesus reached out to Diane with such compassion that I felt a lump rise to my throat.

“Religious people do. You’re right. And I’m sorry for everyone that has hurt you. Truly, I am. Many people are so busy making religion their god that they don’t allow God in their religion. Turns out religion is much more easily manageable than God. Those people you speak of are afraid. They may not even know it, but they are. Pride is a form of fear. They seek control, perfection, a way to escape chaos. They are desperate to measure up for fear of rejection, failure, exposure, whatever the fear is. They have so many layers of behavior modifications and thought processes piled on top of their fear that they can’t even detect it. They look to somehow redeem themselves. But there is only one Redeemer. There is only one love that casts out all fear and those who have that are not religious. That’s what I want to offer you tonight.”

Jesus paused and stared deeply into her eyes. “Diane, the happiness that people seek is Jesus. Eternal happiness can be found in nothing else.”

Diane’s eyes watered and she closed them. Her breath shook a little as she tried to compose herself, “You speak as if you know him. No Christian has ever spoken to me like that.”

Jesus reached out and gently touched her arm. She collapsed into tears at his warm touch, and I knew she was feeling his love for the first time. It was as if the pores of her skin opened up to his liquid love. Diane covered her face with her hands and tried hard not to weep so loudly.

Customers noticed and passed curious glances. Some seemed concerned that whoever was touching her had somehow hurt her, but their thoughts quickly turned when he lifted his hand and caressed the side of her face. Diane grabbed and then pressed his hand against her cheek with hers. Her teeth clenched as she sobbed.

“Do you feel that?” Jesus asked, his voice rough with emotion.

“It’s like fire in my heart,” she sobbed, choking on tears. Her skin became damp with sweat from crying so hard and from the heat of his love. Her smooth skin reddened until her nose was like plumb sauce. Her tears, snot, and saliva got on Jesus’ hand, but it didn’t bother him. He was smiling. He was happy and content…

~To read the full story, click here.

For centuries, the female heart has burned with desire for the lasting pleasure of unchanging love. In the course of time, civilizations have risen and fallen, yet the longing for tangible intimacy has never faded. Millions of lyrics have been written to the passionate tune of this fluid yearning.

Unfortunately, few people find the lasting love they’ve longed for, even as children. Life, education, and societal pressures transform what was once a tangible hope into a mythical fairy tale. Industries have reaped unlimited monetary gain from the erosion of this hope. Billions of girls grow up to become women who have long since tossed their dreams of true love in the trash bin of cynicism. Countless others have buried their ache of unmet desire under the disappointment of failed relationships and hopelessness.

Despite most women’s best attempts, this starved craving remains alive, like a stimulating aroma. This ethereal hope goes back to the first relationship, in a place of being so “seen” and “lovingly known” that “she” was naked and unashamed.

This novella was not written to add salt to the gaping wound of unsatisfied need. It was written to satisfy the need completely. Let Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul introduce you to a lasting relationship with Transcendent Love, where reality becomes sweeter than your dreams.

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Jesus in Disguise (Rosemary)

Right now I’ve been typing up a story called: Mr. Field’s Rosemary (one of my Jesus in disguise books). It takes place in an orchard field with a recently widowed woman on her way to Mr. Joshua Field’s cottage to cook breakfast for him and his six children. What Rosemary discovers is that Mr. Field’s is too going through pain. His beloved wife has run away from home again. This story has two big twists that leads to wholeness for Rosemary and the six adorable children she easily begins to love. I always ask the Lord to help me write and my prayer is that everything I publish leaves a deep, healing impression of Jesus’s love in the heart of every reader. I pray each reader comes to “see” the sweetly inconspicuous ways Jesus is hidden in plain sight in their lives and that they come begin to fellowship with Him daily. Enjoy:

While Joshua was gone Rosemary took some more sips of tea before admiring his kitchen again. She drank in the lovely decor and imagined his wife must have helped him furnish this room. Warmth from the pillar heat lamp rubbed her back like an expert massage therapist.

Rosemary spotted a bright gold chested hummingbird with shimmering emerald wings. It sucked sugared water from a feeder dangling from the paneled patio. The gold-flamed honeysuckle flowers glowed from the peeking rays of the sun. Their vines hung like a soft caress on the patio’s design. The edge of winter was waning and the waking yawns of spring echoed in the scenery.

Joshua announced his presence by softly clearing his throat. He headed for the cabinets, “coffee too?”

“No thank you Mr. Fields. Your tea is quite…perfect.”

Joshua grinned in delight, “I think you’ll enjoy the coffee more.”

Rosemary only stared…missing the taste of freshly brewed coffee on her palate.

“I feel like you’re a coffee drinker.” Mr. Fields stated before turning on the grinder. The inviting scents of the beans wafted underneath Rosemary’s nose.

“I do love coffee,” Rosemary confessed and then shrugged one shoulder, “but usually with a ton of whipped milk and sugar…among other things.” She blushed as she looked down at her belly and slightly patted it, “but I’m trying to lay low on some things right now.”

Mr. Fields gave a sympathetic look.

Tears threatened and Rosemary let out a cough to clear her throat, “I…I overate quite a bit after…” her voice broke. After my husband died, she thought. She shook her head before glancing up at him. His gaze was attentive but not forceful.

A long moment of silence filtered between them, with it, an awkward pressure to break it. Mr. Fields turned off the grinder and carefully made his way toward her.

All of the pain she was feeling was like an angry volcano in her chest. It threatened to squeeze through her throat. Rosemary gulped loudly and her bottom lip twitched. Mr. Fields stopped an arm length away.

She feared he would touch her…but more than that she feared the wrath inside of herself. She had never experienced anger when Richard died…only overwhelming sadness. The worst part was…she felt her anger was directed toward God.

What kind of Christian am I?

Shame flamed Rosemary’s already reddened face. Her jade eyes widened and she took a step back.

“Do you need to talk about it?” Mr. Fields asked gently.

Rosemary shook her head more violently than she intended, “it’s nothing I think would be beneficial to our working relationship.”

“But, would it be beneficial to you? That’s important too.” His voice was so soft it came out like a whisper.

She looked up and saw his beautifully warm eyes. There was genuine care sketched across his bronzy visage.

A thousand thoughts battled in her mind. But the longer she looked at him, the more her mind cleared. It was as if the soft peace she felt around him was being offered to her.
“After…my husband died,” the words came out like the bite of an undying winter. Her shoulders shook and her trembling lips parted before a flood of audible cries came out. Joshua closed the remaining gap between them and wrapped her in his arms. She forgot herself and buried her face against his chest. He rested his chin on her head and embraced her firmly. She stood there in his shelter until she collected herself.

After becoming calm, Rosemary allowed herself to linger in Mr. Field’s supportive arms. She could hear his heartbeat against her ears and the faint scent of spikenard, saffron and calamus were blended like a colon bath on his clothes. Clearing her throat, she put a pushing hand against him and he released her immediately. Clear tears trailed her cheeks, dripped down her chin and splashed against her arms and shirt.

“I…”

He cut her off, “Don’t apologize. I’m glad you got that off your chest.”

She glanced away until he spoke again, “You don’t ever have to pretend you feel anyway other than what you do around me. I’m not unfamiliar with pain…or comfort.”

“Thank you, Mr. Fields.”

He held a hand up, “please call me Joshua. It’s more personable.”

She tilted her head slightly.

“It’s okay if you forget…but it’s another if you do it on purpose. I’m asking you to call me by my first name.”

Deciding not to make waves Rosemary nodded. “Okay,” she verbalized.

“Good,” He said and then only stared. The look on his face spoke volumes more. He desired to say things that she wasn’t ready to hear. Pain flickered in his eyes and then something else. A knowing she couldn’t discern yet it pulled on her soul like a magnet leading straight to his heart.

She sniffled and squinted her eyes in thought.

“I want you to feel like family with myself and the kids.” Joshua said and in her heart, she believed him.

“That is super kind of you to say that. I confess I think my time volunteering with you might unravel some of my emotions. I never meant to involve you in my grieving process, especially since your family is going through a difficult family time as well.”

“I believe this is a good thing,” he said confidently but not arrogantly. Rosemary waited for an explanation and when he offered none she shrugged, “maybe.”

Joshua turned away and went back to fixing his coffee. After pouring fresh water into a silver and black cappuccino machine he offered, “I can help you with breakfast if you like?”

There was something about him that made Rosemary suspect she would not be able to hide behind her self-imposed mask of calm. She trembled inwardly as she feared his peaceful presence would unravel the ugly things within her she had so desperately closed her conscious to. Vulnerability had never been her forte. Her history was marked with painful memories of rejection and scorn whenever she exposed the soft, throbbing, naked places of her soul. She couldn’t imagine Joshua would respond any different.

“No, thank you.” she said, wanting to put distance between herself and him.

Fear not, for you shall not be ashamed; neither be confounded and depressed, for you shall not be put to shame. For you shall forget the shame of your youth, and you shall not [seriously] remember the reproach of your widowhood any more.

For your Maker is your Husband—the Lord of hosts is His name—and the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; the God of the whole earth He is called.

 For the Lord has called you like a woman forsaken, grieved in spirit, and heartsore—even a wife [wooed and won] in youth, when she is [later] refused and scorned, says your God. -Isaiah 54:4-6 AMP

As always, may you enjoy the warmth of Jesus’s love today in  familiar and unexpected places! For a romantic fictional book on the bridegroom love of Jesus, check out my book, Romantic Rendezvous for The Soul!

“As I read, I quickly became enthralled with this book, so beautifully written in the language of love. Each of these short stories so accurately reflects the romantic and wooing heart of the Bridegroom which draws you to Himself into a deeper place of love and intimacy. If you have not yet experienced romantic intimacy with God, I’m confident that this book will set you on course. It’s bound to warm your soul and whet your desire for your own heart-to-heart conversations and experiences with God. The author creatively ministers to the soul, bringing truth to light in the most tangible ways; you will feel that God is speaking directly to you, and He most certainly is!

Some stories caused me to be drawn away into remembrance of my own experiences and conversations with God that have freed my soul; others caused me to reevaluate my heart’s commitment to my first Husband and cry out for forgiveness; and yet others simply took me on a delightful and exciting adventure of what the beginning of a holy, unadulterated love looks like – so refreshing to the soul! I commend the author for using her creative gifting to share personal reflections and heart intimacies which I know could only come from the deep well of Father’s heart. I highly recommend this book as a must read!” -Marina Garcia

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