You created all of them by your Spirit, and you give new life to the earth. -Psalm 104:30
I fell in love with a Man who is not a man at all but He comes for every man.
I fell in love with the Father’s Spirit. The breath that entered into the molecular structure of all of creation when the world was young, vibrant, breathtaking, perfect, effervescent, pure, undefiled, majestic, with beautiful landscapes. These terrains are vast like the stars and stunning like gold sunlight on the deep blue wide oceans as colorful as blue rainbows blending with paints: turquoise, azure, lapis, sapphire, and royal blue.
I fell in love with the only One who knows the Father’s heart, for as no one knows the heart of man but his spirit so no one knows the heart of God as the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 2:11). For He takes what is in God’s heart and reveals it to us (1 Corinthians 2:10).
The way He loves is deep and sweet. His connection with my heart is more intimate than the blood that pumps through my body.
As the clouds blanket the amazon rainforest in mist so dense the dewdrops are seen on every blade of grass, every leaf, every animal, every insect, every flower and the rich soil is made wet by these mountainous clouds, so the diffused Presence of the Holy Spirit moistens my soul.
I cannot imagine my life without His Presence. He is called the Life-Giving Spirit (John 6:63). The words Jesus spoke were Spirit and Life during His time on earth as a Man. His words were so rich with grace that the people marveled who heard them (Luke 4:22) And the Holy Spirit brings to us the words of Jesus now (John 16:13).
You are the breath within my lungs. You are the life within me. You are the One who sustains my life and You are the One who has healed my body every time I was sick.
“When I read Visions of Celestial Love, it is as if I am brought down to my knees to worship. What the Holy Spirit has done in and through Ashley, He is doing also in me. What a wonderful experience. It is very rich. Thank you for sharing the treasure.”—Riko Suci Alam, CEO of Ligar Jaya and owner of Clove Garden hotel in Bandung Indonesia.
“Let his left hand be under my head And his right hand embrace me.” -Song of Solomon 2:6 AMP
Father, I’m in one of those moments right now.
You know where I am and you come to find me.
It’s a place I’ve been many times since knowing you.
It’s the moment where my heart longs to sit inside a cozy cottage centered amid a jade glen with emerald climbing vines and flowering wisteria decorating the walls.
I want to enter into this place you’ve created inside of me. (Luke 17:21)
I long to gaze upon a burning, crackling and humming hearth and smell sage and cinnamon blending together. The vibrant flames of gold, orange, and ruby red glimmer and mix together like precious pieces of treasure–each beautifully unique and eye-catching.
I’m longing for your arms to embrace me.
I’m longing for your tangible touch again.
I’m longing to enter that sacred place in my heart where the Word becomes flesh. (John 1:14)
This holy place where heaven meets earth.
This special place where eternity enters time, and this shared space becomes divine.
I’m thirsting for this place where you set a table before me, where you enter my soul with words filling like the last Supper–your words are sweet bread to my tongue. (John 6:51)
Where my heart is poured upon with the fragrant oil of your Holy Spirit and He coats my skin with radiant love.
I long to rest in this place where incense covers the soil of my inner being like dewy mist in a lush garden.
Oh Abba, I desire you.
I wait for you like the watchmen for the morning. (Psalm 130:6)
I am sick with love. (Song of Solomon 2:5)
I seek to gaze upon your heart.
I seek to be hidden in the deepest alcove in your chest.
I desire to be secured inside the core of your being.
I want to walk with you inside of your heart.
In your heart I find the beauty of heaven and earth.
An immense beauty,
A glowing light.
A translucence more captivating than a million rainbows in a hazy sky.
A vast beauty more breathtaking than the expanse of every azure sea.
A mystery more spectacular than the starry constellations.
Your love is the safest place.
There is no fear in your love.
No worry.
No anxiety.
No stress.
No selfishness.
Your love for me is personal.
Your love for me is priceless.
Your love for me is the source of my life.
My security.
My surety.
My eternity.
My peace.
My harmony.
My self-worth is solid in your love.
Oh Father, I’m longing for your embrace.
For your warm arms to wrap around me.
I long to feel your heartbeat on my back.
To nuzzle my face under your chin.
To fall asleep wrapped up in you.
To be with you is to truly be free.
To be with you is to be with pure love.
“Surely I have calmed and quieted my soul; Like a weaned child [resting] with his mother, My soul is like a weaned child within me [composed and freed from discontent].” -Psalm 131:2 AMP
~If you enjoyed this poem, check out my book, Visions of Celestial Love (a modern day book of psalms and prayers):
“Ashley presents us with a true cornucopia of modern psalms, personal testimonies, and short stories. She has set out to reveal and unravel some of the most complex heart issues mankind faces in our quest of understanding what true intimacy with God really looks like. Prepare to have your soul massaged and worked on as you read Visions of Celestial Love.” — Jeremy Minard, Servant King Apparel
Then God said, “Let Us (Father, Son, Holy Spirit) make man in Our image, according to Our likeness… -Genesis 1:26 AMP
And the LORD God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul. –Genesis 2:7
How precious do you believe you are to God?
Every single one of us are so loved by God. He has, does and will love us with everlasting love. In his eternal wisdom and mercy, He planned our salvation and our admission into his heavenly family.
Recently Jesus showed me that when He released his last breath and gave up his spirit on the cross…that it was like God (Triune) breathing breath into Adam’s/my/our body and then Adam becoming a living soul…a son of God.
We have become children of God by putting our trust in what Jesus accomplished on the cross. (1 John 3:1)
There is so much wonder in the what Jesus did on the cross. There is so much love and so much grace.
I felt like Father told me that He has never stopped looking for Adam. He looks for Adam in unbelievers today. He lovingly searches for them so He can breathe his Spirit breath into them like He did for us.
He has never stopped wanting mankind to live in fellowship with Him in a heavenly place (once called Eden), now called the Kingdom of Heaven which is near us and in us by his Holy Spirit. (Romans 14:17)
Like He breathed into Adam…He breathes his Spirit, his love, his very life into us.
There’s more glory and love from God that He wants you to experience and receive…there’s so much more .
The Father’s love is boundless.
His plan is eternal.
His wisdom is magnificent.
I hope you continually increase in the experiential knowledge of his amazing love for you. He had you in his mind before time began. (Romans 8:29)
Father God has your face imprinted on the palm of his hand (Isaiah 49:16 AMP). I know it’s tradition for some people to tattoo the names or faces of loved ones on their bodies. God has shown his love in yet another way, by putting your face on his palm. And while I’m not sure if this looks exactly like our human example of a “tattoo” it does mean that you are “ever before” Him. He is mindful of you.
Jesus displayed the greatest love, in giving his life on the cross for you. (John 15:13) . And He bears the marks of his love for you on his wrists.
When Jesus had cried out again in a loud voice, He yielded up His spirit. At that moment the veil of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom. The earth quaked and the rocks were split.… -Matthew 27:50-51
If you would like a compilation of words on the Father’s eternal love for you, check out my book, Visions of Celestial Love, by clicking here. It is filled with the things Father has shown me. His love for you is deep. He woos you with transformative grace, steadfast compassion and cleansing truth
“Ashley Thompson’s book, Visions of Celestial Love is just that; a visionary work of epic proportions. It is glimpses into a loving and remarkable relationship with the creator of the universe.
You are invited to Dive into stories of love and compassion, healing and provision, loss and recovery, profound grace and faith. Ashley draws us in with her descriptive prose and unique style of writing.
There are so many stories to relate to in this book and I’m sure you will find your own story among the many that are told here. So, find your favorite spot, your favorite beverage, and curl up with “Visions of Celestial Love”!” –Amazon Reviewer.
So you have not received a spirit that makes you fearful slaves. Instead, you received God’s Spirit when he adopted you as his own children. Now we call him, “Abba, Father.” -Romans 8:15 NLT
It took me a while to call God my Abba Father. Like most Christians that I’ve meet, I mentally acknowledged that He was my Father and I would even attribute that title to Him in my prayers…but I did not know Him in the sweet, warm and assuring way a child knows a loving father. I would not have run into his arms like a little girl would do if her father came home and bent a knee so he could scoop her up.
Thankfully, over the years God has slowly, patiently, tenderly and steadily ushered me into the safety of his arms. Years ago I was sitting on my sister’s couch in her room and I was looking up at the ceiling as I talked to God. I began thanking him for adopting me into His Family. I thought I was doing pretty good with my thanksgiving…I thought I understood his love and the whole adoption thing, but I didn’t discern the depths of his affection…so He stopped me. “Ashley,” He said, “you were always my child.” After He said that, I realized, He always meant to adopt me. In His heart, I was always His. This is true of you. He always loved you as a child.
Years after that I was reading the book of Hosea and God began writing poetry to me. I heard Him whisper inside my heart, “you are a reflection of all my affections.” The instances where his love has caught me off guard and wooed were so numerous that I finally began to allow my soul to marinate in the anointed, fragrant waters of his heart.
I’ve learned that it’s okay to call Him “Daddy” even when I’ve messed up. I’ve learned to lean into his warm chest and relax at his touch. I’ve learned that He just wants me…no strings attached. There’s no need to fear that his love will ever let go.
Like Hosea, He chases me even when I’ve been unfaithful and I finally stop trembling for fear of Him but I tremble at his goodness: But afterward the people will return and devote themselves to the LORD their God and to David’s descendant, their king. In the last days, they will tremble in awe of the LORD and of his goodness. -Hosea 3:5
I melt from the fire of devotion that blazes in His eyes.
One night as I lay in bed…my pillow wet with tears as familiar condemning thoughts sought to uproot what He had planted in my heart (the seeds of His faithful devotion to me), I thought I saw a glimpse of Him at the foot of my bed. His eyes wet like rivers and verse after verse flowed over me like warm spiced waves:
“How can I ever give you up? My heart recoils within me. My compassion’s are kindled together!” -Hosea 11:8.
I realized it hurt Him deeply that I doubted his devotion. I realized it pained Him that I was in pain (Hebrews 4:15). This realization of his steadfast and faithful love toward me produced such trust and personal love for him in my heart. This personal love for him became the sweetest source of peace for me as I drew close to him with my heart. I finally rested in his arms and I soon began to worship him with my soul.
And so He became the Lover of my soul, my God, my Father, my Friend…everything that I trust. My resting place. My secure Rock. My King and the only One that I bow down to in reverence. So for love of him, I’ve learned to love his truth, his righteous ways, his eternal Word. Love has captivated my heart forever.
I pray that no matter what season of life you’re in right now, that you would allow yourself to be deeply loved. I pray all your days will be swept up in the arms of your heavenly Daddy. His arms are the safest place you will ever be. His devotion and affection for you is undying, pure, powerful, healing and faithful. May your world be lite with his love more than the sun’s rays lights this planet.
~For a book on discovering the divine love of God, check out devotional book, Visions of Celestial Love. May your heart be blessed with eternal words of beauty, grace and peace:
“Ashley presents us with a true cornucopia of modern psalms, personal testimonies, and short stories. She has set out to reveal and unravel some of the most complex heart issues mankind faces in our quest of understanding what true intimacy with God really looks like. Prepare to have your soul massaged and worked on as you read Visions of Celestial Love.” — Jeremy Minard, Servant King Apparel
My son, pay attention to what I say; turn your ear to my words. Do not let them out of your sight, keep them within your heart; for they are life to those who find them and health to one’s whole body.
—Proverbs 4:20–21 NIV
Dearest Reader,
I’ve prayed just now. I prayed in this warm kitchen with chai tea steaming out of “my” coffee cup on this cold and dewy day. I’ve prayed for you, as a twenty-one-year-old girl, with the rain pelting on the kitchen roof and windows, that God’s Word in this book will be life, health, and medicine to all your flesh. Because that is what His word is. And I pray you feel the depth of beauty in that. May it cause you to wonder. It’s so amazing to me. His Word is so good, so glorious, so gentle, so life transforming, so refreshing, so rejuvenating, so vital...
Sometimes in life we can feel like a limp, fallen branch, caked with mud, on the side of the road, with cars bustling by, wondering why life seems so bleak. We sometimes get charred by the fire of disappointments in this fallen life. Other times, we are swung about in the stormy winds of busyness, which produce only bareness.
I’m glad to tell you that there is life, and there is light beyond your wildest imaginations. By opening what some call “just a book,” you, through graced faith, unleash hope more glorious than the warm feeling of the sunlight streaming through heavy, unrelenting rain clouds.
I pray that as you read this, our Vinedresser God would unite you—for the first time, if you’re not saved, or unite you even tighter if you are—to our Vine Jesus Christ. I pray He will take you in His strong but gentle hands and carefully ingraft you to the tree of life.
May you feel the inner cleansing of His word as He washes you off. May your soul explode with joy as He shines the light of His face on you, which is brighter and warmer than the sun.
Imagine yourself as a branch in a beautiful winery. Because that is where He wants to take you, to the vineyard of Heaven, inside His holy palace, in the midst of His heart. He wants to rock you in His arms. He wants you to let Him love you. So let Him love you.
You’ll find yourself becoming full of life, like a bare winter branch during early spring, sprouting with buds of the brightest green. You’ll find yourself in the midst of the promised life. Let yourself blossom in the presence of the Great King. He has extended His invitation and His arms for you.
He calls you by name and says, “Come away, to be where you’ve always belonged.”
Walk with Him through His field and smell the sweet berries of life. Taste from the running streams of Living Water and be awakened and completely healed. Be full of life. Let real life, the abundant life that is promised to you by Jesus overtake you on the inside, and spring forth into your heart. Let it run through your blood, heal and wash your mind with the Word that brings peace, and envelope your skin like the trickling of a cool refreshing breeze. Let yourself be run over with the water of the Word, through the breath of the Spirit who brings life.
Remember, as you read, that God’s Word is life, healing, and medicine to all your flesh.
“Come, all you are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost. Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy? Listen, listen to me and eat wha tis good, and you will delight in the richest of fare.” – Isaiah 55:1-2 NIV
Are you ready to taste of the sweet delicacies of God in a deeply reviving and personal way? For those who want to drink, for those who want to eat and be refreshed and renewed, Visions of Celestial Love is a feast between you and the King of Heaven, who loves you more than anyone else. He invites you to dine on wholesome, good, savory food and delicious, zesty, fruitful drink. He awaits you with a sparkle in His eye. He is ready for your company. He delights to have you as a guest.
“Eat, friends, and drink; drink your fill of love.” – Song of Songs 5:1 NIV
For more information visit: www.nourishmentthroughwords.com
“Ashley presents us with a true cornucopia of modern psalms, personal testimonies, and short stories. She has set out to reveal and unravel some of the most complex heart issues mankind faces in our quest of understanding what true intimacy with God really looks like. Prepare to have your soul massaged and worked on as you read Visions of Celestial Love.” — Jeremy Minard, Servant King Apparel
Thus by two unchangeable things in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have fled to take hold of the hope set before us may be strongly encouraged. This hope is a strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls. It leads us through the curtain into God’s inner sanctuary. -Hebrews 6:18-19
A few days ago, I sat across from my grandmother while coddling Elena. I had an agenda for that afternoon, but my newborn was in the mood to cluster feed and so I was trapped on the couch. The forced stillness opened up a beautiful space in time for my grandmother to share some of the visions she’s had of Heaven.
“Tell me about heaven.” I asked, having nothing to do. As quiet worship music played in the background my grandmother told me of one of the times God showed her Heaven. Some of the things that really moved my heart was when she said:
“There are children in heaven. Every child that dies on earth goes there.
”“There is a wall of pure gold set with precious stones in an arch at the top…twelve gates. It’s so beautiful. Like nothing you’ve ever seen.”
“The flowers, trees and fruit there are so vibrant and the fruit is sweet, sweet and succulent.”
“God showed me how I would look in Heaven. I had on this white flowy dress and I had long hair and He told me “you will be young and beautiful forever.” My House was two story and it had a spiral staircase like pearls”
“There is no sadness, only joy. Just happiness. The streets are made of gold. It’s exactly as the Bible says it will be.”
As grandma talked, I saw her lips slowly curve upward into a blissful smile and remain that way. She was so happy. Her eyes seemed to twinkle. I laughed softly & said, “you look so happy.
”She told me she was very happy and that she was ready for heaven. I laughed and told her to wait a while longer before she goes. She replied, “my child, earth is a trash heap compared to heaven. I’m not afraid of dying. The angels will be waiting for me.”
I too shared a vision I had of Heaven and seeing God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. It’s amazing how similar our accounts were.
I’m so grateful for that moment in time where my one month old slowed down my fast pacing so that I could sit and talk with my grandmother. Since then, grandma and I have talked much more…only because I’ve relearned the value of sitting still and listening to (on a deeper level) the wonderful, anointed, caring and amazing woman, I call my grandmother.
As believers, we have an eternally beautiful life promise that will come to full brilliance like the break of sunshine after a long night. We have a hope more secure than the heaviest anchor. We have a treasure more rich than all the gold in the world. We will have, in every sense, His kingdom come, “on earth as it is in heaven.”
About a year after I wrote this, my grandma went home to be with Jesus. During her funeral a bright blue star streaked across the night sky. My sisters says it was the brightest star she ever saw. A few days later I came across a scripture verse where God says that his children shall be numerous like the stars of the heavens…
~A vivid snippet from the revised version of my book, Romantic Rendezvous for The Soul. May you come to understand and experience the rich and faithful love of Jesus as He dwells in His new glorious temple…your recreated heart. He will never leave you, He will never forsake you. He lives in you. (Colossians 1:27)
My beloved one, both handsome and winsome, you are pleasing beyond words. Our resting place is anointed and flourishing, like a green forest meadow bathed in light. Rafters of cedar branches are over our heads and balconies of pleasant-smelling pines. —Song of Solomon 1:16–17 TPT
He stood and extended his hand for me to take.
I felt like the woman caught in the act of adultery. Mercy washed over me in silky light, like the waves from his robe. He didn’t condemn me. There were no accusations. There was no stone in his hand. (John 8:11)
In fact, his hand seemed like an extension of his heart—promising to heal me even before I vowed to commit myself to him in the way he desired.
There was no cost for his healing. He freely offered to make me whole, with no hidden stipulations. Such grace empowered me and I felt my bones were stronger somehow. I felt like spring grass soaking in solar light from the sunshine of his presence within me. (Hebrews 13:9, 2 Corinthians 5:19)
The seeds within me pulsated with life. (Galatians 3:16, Luke 8:11)
I took his hand and he pulled me up to my feet. All the other guests in the room rose as well. Their presence was tangibly felt. They carried a weighty air about them that was holy and priestly. When they saw he meant to escort me away, they returned to their dancing.
Many things crossed my mind as Jesus and I crossed the dance floor into a more private corridor with a balcony view, namely I wondered why none of the saints pursued Jesus?
A banner hung from the room’s entryway. In Aramaic it read:
Strengthen me with raisin cakes, refresh me with apples, for I am weak with love. (Song of Songs 2:5)
The small elegant room featured a three-dimensional mural floor of a blooming vineyard blushing under a hazy sunset. The painting was so lifelike, even the dust kicked up in the air was illuminated like grated gold by the imaginary sunrays. The emerald leaves were silhouetted in basking glory and turned into a yellowish jade. Rows and rows of vines lacing around each other made me catch my breath.
Rosy marbled walls formed an arch in the center of the room before giving way to a chandelier that resembled a flourishing desert rose. Diamond-shaped light bulbs hung from the chandelier and sent shafts of prism light pirouetting across the walls. In the corner of the room was a large bed, hidden behind transparent curtains.
“It is lovely in here,” I breathed, admiring the splendor.
A lamp stand table made of polished gold held woven baskets with embroider cloths set beside them. Inside the baskets were marble bowls heaped with fresh fruit. The fragrance of ripe strawberries, dates, pomegranates, figs, and honey-painted cakes teased my nose. I saw blocks of cheese and nuts beside the fruit.
“Eat some,” Jesus offered, finally releasing my hand, “You haven’t eaten anything all night.”
…
I took a plump strawberry and popped it in my mouth. A refreshing, tart flavor with just the right amount of sugar burst in my mouth. I hummed in delight, imaging that only Eden carried such delectable fruits.
I took up another, and then another before trying a fig and a date. They were equally good but distinguishingly unique. I plopped several blocks of different colored cheese in my mouth until my cheeks swelled like a chipmunk’s. I had difficulty chewing but managed more easily after the first few bites. The rich flavors blended together like cream and salt. Afterward, I went for the nuts in handfuls. When I finished with those I took up a half slice of a pomegranate and plucked some seeds coated in red wine gel. I cupped my hand to my lips and let the seeds fall in before chewing. The tart taste reminded me of the best sherbet punch.
We ate for several more minutes before my appetite was satiated. Afterward, I felt the stickiness of dried fruit juices and honey on my hands. I rubbed my fingers together wondering how I would wash them.
“Is there a bathroom?” I asked.
“I have a jar of water and hyssop out here,” Jesus said, extending his hand toward the balcony.
We walked on the elevated porch, the sky canopied over us. I noticed a hard, blue clay pitcher in the corner. Beside it was a pink potted hyssop bush aflame with brilliant flowers, the color of nectarine skin.
I cupped my hands and Jesus poured some water between them before taking some flowers from the bush. He set them in my hands and I rubbed them together feverishly. He rinsed my hands again and I lightly dried my wet hands with an embroidered cloth beside the baskets. When I finished, I brought my hands to my nose and inhaled deeply the fragrant scent of hyssop plant. I took up the jar and poured water over Jesus’ hands. Afterward, I plucked up a few flowers before putting them in his hands. He repeated what I had done, and I fell silent.
I leaned my torso across the balcony and rested my head in one of my hands. Despite the snow that crested the mountains, I was warm. I looked out and admired the scenery before me. Everything seemed so expansive that I felt a little bit swallowed up in the grandeur of it all. I let my eyes linger over the glowing city, savoring the physical beauty of it like I savored the food I had eaten. Beauty fed my soul like nutritious food nourished my body. Jesus leaned his elbows on the railing of the balcony and also looked upon the terrain before us.
“How come nobody has come in here yet to seek you out?” I asked, finally voicing the question I had tucked away inside when he had whisked me away to the private room.
“What do you mean?” Jesus asked, unassuming.
I shrugged and then my eyebrows fell until they hovered over my eyes.
“Well, I’m just confused as to why we haven’t been crowded yet? I mean, didn’t you deal with that constantly after you began your ministry on earth?”
“I did.”
“So why, if these people know who you are, do they not love you?”
“They do.”
“But they aren’t trying to be near you?” I countered, slightly nonplussed.
“Because they know that I’m near them.”
“Even though you’re in here with me?”
“Yes. They understand that I live within them. That my promise is true. I will never leave them nor forsake them. They don’t need me to appear to them in this way in order for them to be content with me or with themselves. They converse with me all the time.” (ex: John 20:27)
My eyes fell to my cinnamon brown hands. An almost undetectable sense of failure came over me.
“They understand what I don’t fully comprehend,” I said lowly.
Just as quickly as the sense of failure had come, an inner quickening rose within me like a heater being turned on in the dead of winter. It came like a skilled soldier, swiftly combating the negativity that wanted to seize territory. I felt as if a seed had sprouted under the soil of my consciousness. Suddenly an assurance came up, and with it a loving caress that chased away all notions of shame.
I didn’t feel the need to compare myself to the couples on the dancefloor anymore. The precipitous change in my emotions puzzled and pleased me at the same time. I touched my stomach and easily discerned the presence of my Holy Friend (John 14:17).
I heard a soft chuckle from Jesus and refocused my attention on him.
“He’s amazing, isn’t he?” I asked, knowing the answer.
“He’s the Father’s gift to you and to all those sealed for me. You need not fear anything, beloved, not even death. Because of my Father’s Spirit, you will always be with us. He has sealed you forever and he isn’t going anywhere.” (Ephesians 1:!3)
“I think I know that now,” I said. Emotion caught in my throat. My mind traveled to precious instances in my past where the Holy Spirit had comforted and rescued me. There were many nights when I had cried myself to sleep on my bed and felt a warm arm around my heart.
“I love his faithfulness,” I whispered, and again touched my stomach, this time as if I were trying to embrace a friend.
“He will help you comprehend what the others understand. It’s his joy and delight to do so. He has much patience with you. There is peace in his mind toward you. You need never be frustrated with yourself, because it’s the opposite of how he feels about you.” (John 14:26, Hebrews 8:2)
I nodded and the breeze kicked up. The wind carried the fresh fragrance of spikenard, which diffused the air like a perfume bath. The dust of powdery snow lifted and swirled around in the breeze. A few frozen droplets touched my cheeks and I shivered. Some flakes of snow rested and then melted in my hair once the air stilled. I felt as if I had been touched by starlight.
“He would like to take you someplace as well,” Jesus said.
I reflected for a few seconds and then uttered, “Yes. I’m happy to go anywhere he wants me to.”
“Okay.”
Jesus turned toward me. I stood still as he placed his fingers on my temples. Instinctively, I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply, anticipation building in me…
~I hope you enjoyed this preview of my revised version of Romantic Rendezvous for The Soul (Tasting the Bridegroom Love of Jesus). To purchase a copy of the 1st version, click here. As an author, the sincerest way anyone can thank me is through writing a review of my book(s) on amazon. If you’ve been blessed by my work, I would love to hear from you! Your review reaches out to other women and invites them into this ministry of words…and more importantly, into the tender love of Jesus inside the pages.
“Ashley Thompson’s Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul is simply wonderful. Deliciously descriptive, it nourishes the soul with fresh revelation of God’s love for humanity. This collection of short stories may challenge your thinking about what true intimacy looks like, while making your heart yearn to daily experience the Perfect Love described within its pages. Romantic Rendezvous invites you into a world created by Love Himself, where there’s no mistaking that His love for every individual is not only unconditional and never-failing, but also deeply personal and precious to Him. Get ready to experience the purpose, pleasure, and power of real love!” -Danielle Sanders, Worshiper, Songwriter, Licensed Minister, Former Highschool teacher
~For my book on returning to the liberating and strengthening grace of our heavenly Father, Visions of Celestial Love, click here.
“Ashley McClelland presents us with a true cornucopia of modern psalms, personal testimonies, and short stories. She has set out to reveal and unravel some of the most complex heart issues mankind faces in our quest of understanding what true intimacy with God really looks like. Prepare to have your soul massaged and worked on as you read Visions of Celestial Love.” — Jeremy Minard, Servant King Apparel
Blessings to you as you learn how to journey through this life walking closely with the truest Lover of your heart!
“So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” -Jesus in John 13:34-35
How do you view the church? Do you view it as an organization? Do you view it as a religious institution? Do you view it as a charity?
What comes to your mind when you think of the church? What do you feel in your heart?
For years I had a rocky (love-hate) relationship with the church. My first real experience of the church came after I fully gave my heart to Jesus, alone, living in college campus housing, at 16 years old. I saw what looked like white translucent rain falling through the ceiling and I felt a cloud expand in my chest as Jesus came to truly live and abide in my heart. I quickly became enthralled with Jesus as I learned how to be sensitive to the Holy Spirit and keep a tender heart toward the Bible (I read the Bible cover to cover).
After I was born-again, I had a newfound, sweetly pure but dangerously naïve view of the church and myself. I saw the church as a place of “Jesus-filled” people. I thought everyone would basically be “perfect” and always show unfailing love to one another even in the midst of disagreements (my expectations were obviously not based in reality. For although we have been made perfect in Christ -Hebrews 10:13, we have to actively choose to walk in the fruit of the Holy Spirit/perfection -Galatians 5:22-23).
Because I loved Jesus, I proactively started to become involved with my local church. I spent years volunteering at church in different areas. I met and made the first real friendships in my life. I met the most precious people on earth to my heart. I was richly showered with love, care, generosity and wisdom from a lot of the people around me (particularly a group of older women who I called my “best friends.”). I was so plugged in and had built such meaningful relationships that I practically lived at church. I was there 5-7 days a week, literally. I worked at the church preschool (that accounted for at least 3 days), I served as a youth leader on Wednesday nights, I served as a Missionette teacher on family nights, I was there Sunday to attend and sometimes I would serve as a prayer minister or nursery worker etc. It was beautiful for a long time.
However, after four years I spiraled into disillusionment and disappointment with the church (as a whole) when I faced a faith-shaking crisis “alone.” I felt left alone in the midst of the greatest storm of sadness and hopelessness in my life. The people I thought would come to my aid and offer love, were oblivious to my deeply internal pain (for details on what my crisis entailed, click here). I let the perceived abandonment of misunderstandings sink me into a whirling pool of bitterness.
In my emotional pit, I began to think back over the years and focus on the little offenses and hurts that I had experienced in church. As I played these episodes in my mind, I began to nitpick the issues I saw within the church (some of them were imagined). Slowly I began to criticize others and sometimes side with the Accuser in my head concerning my divine family.
If someone says, “I love God,” but hates a fellow believer, that person is a liar; for if we don’t love people we can see, how can we love God, whom we cannot see? And he has given us this command; Those who love God must also love their fellow believers. -1 John 4:20-21
Later, I tentatively adopted my own version of the infamous mantra, “I love Jesus but I hate the church.” I never truly “hated” the church but I certainly allowed my heart to harden toward it. The paradoxical philosophy of “Lord save me from your people” was rippling across culture at the time and for all its luminous and intellectually lucid appeal, its foundation was a murky cesspool of: bitterness, hurt, unforgiveness, misunderstanding, judgement, rebellion, faithlessness, and a vast assortment of carnality.
For a brief season, I was swept away in its viciously charming tide.
Thankfully, Father came after my heart through his unconditional love. He appealed to my heart as a loving Father who longs for his children to harmoniously live together as family:
I appeal to you, dear brothers and sisters, by the authority of our Lord Jesus Christ, to live in harmony with each other. Let there be no divisions in the church. Rather, be of one mind, united in thought and purpose. –1 Corinthians 1:10 NLT
I slowly began to re-receive his grace. During this healing process, He slowly lifted the dark veil of bitterness from my eyes and washed my heart with cleansing mercy. I began to see how wrong I had been in my view of the church. I began to look at that time in my life objectively instead of narrowly from a place of emotional despair. With clearer vision, I noticed the ways I had sunken myself into the crisis. I saw how I had been partly responsible for the ignorance in others. After all, I kept my crisis hidden from many of them (I guess I wanted them to know intuitively that I needed help instead of being vulnerable and honest about my own personal weaknesses, mistakes, doubts and feelings of being “used and discarded.”).
The few precious people who did know how severe the trauma was, did come along side of me in prayer, visits, text messages, patience, gifts and love. They didn’t all love me in the way I wanted to be loved, some of them were wrong in their speech and actions… but they did show love to the best of their ability (at that time, my mind was so stormy with tumultuous thoughts, someone could easily have offended me).
God used those people to help save me (literally save me) and help me see, how much I needed the church. I began to see and feel the love of God for the church and offer them the same mercy God was showing me. I began to overlook their faults and forgive them and myself.
We love each other because he first loved us. -1 John 4:19
My view of the church has gradually become more mature and more based in reality and scriptural soundness. The church is my family. The church is my first taste of heaven. The church is a part of my eternal spirit because the church is the Body of Christ. And we are all parts of Jesus. If one part of the body is broken off…the whole body is now crippled. If one part of the body is bruised, the whole body is damaged as a result (I did a short video on this, you can view it by clicking here):
There is one body, but it has many parts. But all its many parts make up one body. It is the same with Christ. We were all baptized by one Holy Spirit. And so we are formed into one body. It didn’t matter whether we were Jews or Gentiles, slaves or free people. We were all given the same Spirit to drink. So the body is not made up of just one part. It has many parts. -1 Corinthians 12:12-14
More recently my view of the church has changed since becoming a mother to more than one child.
Shortly after giving birth to my second child, I began to taste the love of God for the church in a whole new way. I wrote a prayer for my daughters and the church during a heated season of rampant division and discord in our nation:
In this world that likes to divide us because of political differences, racial sensitivities, religious traditions, sub-cultural perspectives, and an endless list of other things…my prayer for our girls is that the love of Jesus will guard their relationship . I pray they will never let the world drift them apart. I pray they will be unoffendable because of the radiance and truth of God abiding in their hearts.
I pray they will support each other through thick and thin. I pray they will learn to easily forgive and to reconcile differences in a peaceful manner (learn mature conflict resolution). I pray they will walk in God’s wisdom which is humble and full of understanding. I pray they will flourish in life and have a rich relationship with each other (even after I’m gone from this earth. I pray they will be spiritually, emotionally, mentally and physically strong for their entire lives and that their inner source will be the life of Jesus inside of them.
I pray they will give to one another when the other is in financial stress. I pray their children and husbands will get along and learn family value. I pray they will be examples of Heaven’s ways on earth..
Because as Christians we cannot allow our love to grow cold. Jesus told us to love each other deeply from the heart. And to love one another the way He has shown us love. That kind of love is sacrificial and selfless in nature…divine. It’s the cure for this planet. It’s the medicine for the diseased soul. It’s the peace that surpasses understanding. And it’s the joy that brings strength to those who are feeble and faint with the trails and worries of life:
-“Knowledge puffs up, but love edifies.”
–“Blessed are the peacemakers. For they will be called children of God.” -Jesus in Matthew 5:9
–“Six things God hates…he who sows discord among brethren.” -Proverbs 6:19
One of the worst things I can imagine as a parent is the thought of my children growing up and then hating one another. I couldn’t imagine anything much more heartbreaking than seeing my children…whom I raised together and at one point thought I was giving my life for (childbirth)…full of resentment toward each other. Now, I can only imagine God’s heart breaking up in heaven as He watches his children quarreling, slandering and accusing each other. So many broken relationships over political and social drama…even after His Son died so that we might be united and joined together as a redeemed family. I pray we, the church, learn to walk in love toward each other and not let the temporal issues of the world keep us from our heavenly mission and the bond of peace, unity and faith
~My husband took these photos of myself and the girls a few weeks after Elena was born <3
I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I wouldn’t be alive today or have most of the good things in my life had it not been for brothers and sisters in Christ. No matter who has hurt you, God’s love can make you whole again. Although the church is not everything it should be now…it will be just like Jesus in eternity. We will all live in such celestial bliss and divine love and harmony with each other that no tears will be left to cry. We are forever family. I pray God leads you to brothers and sisters in Christ who will be this in your life. I pray you will be this to other members of Christ’s body as well, knowing that what heals them ultimately heals you. And what heals you, ultimately heals them.
“When I read Visions of Celestial Love, it is as if I am brought down to my knees to worship. What the Holy Spirit has done in and through Ashley, He is doing also in me. What a wonderful experience. It is very rich. Thank you for sharing the treasure.”—Riko Suci Alam, CEO of Ligar Jaya and owner of Clove Garden hotel in Bandung Indonesia.
But the Helper (Comforter, Advocate, Intercessor—Counselor, Strengthener, Standby), the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name [in My place, to represent Me and act on My behalf], He will teach you all things. And He will help you remember everything that I have told you. -John 14:26 AMP
Have you ever struggled to sleep because you lacked peace inside your heart?
I understand.
Because I’m there right now…
It’s late at night and I’m awake when I should be asleep.
I’m up because my day has had a draining undertow of anxiety strung like spinning thread inside the veins that flow blood throughout my body. I’ve felt so rushed in daily choirs, and I haven’t stopped to tend to the real needs of my heart.
I’m up late because my two young daughters are finally asleep and I find it hard to focus on my soul and healing subjects when they are awake.
I’m up late because there are no demands in this moment and the neglected pain, inward desire and questions that I have for God are surfacing to the top of my conscious mind like the swelling of a wave.
I’m up.
I’m awake.
And unmet desire raps at the door of my soul again.
I now clearly hear the steady beating that has been happening all day, but now instead of deafening my ears to it, I choose to listen.
“What do you want?” I ask my soul, already knowing the answer.
When the great longing of my soul is seen, like an emaciated person reeling with hunger, I freeze. Feelings of powerlessness overwhelm me because I know I cannot fill the aching, (seemingly abysmal) void.
The cold reality of my human incapability and poverty makes me want to swing the door shut again on my hungry desire and pretend I never saw it. But I know such carelessness wouldn’t be innocuous. My mind battles what to do.
I would just as soon ignore it, except I know it will persist.
I would just squish it, except I know it to be immortal and incapable of death.
I think to squelch it again, under the dulling drug of busyness, but I know it will only make my heart sick and heart ailment is a disease I find I can’t bear. Besides this, the chronic state of an ailing heart usually leads to an addiction of some form (in my case…the chocolate pantry).
The need of The Comforter rises from within me like a child’s whimpering cry to the peak of my throat. I can almost taste the unshed tears at the back of my tongue.
“Holy Spirit,” I whisper, “Help me. I cannot help myself. Father God, I’m so hungry. I’m hungry for your promises. I’m thirsty for things I know are coming but they have not manifested in my life yet. I’m hungry to see my dreams become reality and trusting You in the waiting is hard. I know your Word says that by faith and patience we inherit the promises…but the waiting is such a battle of faith somedays. I’m hungry to see your goodness and your kingdom come in the lives of several friends and family members. I know You have a much more wonderful reality for them than what they are living in. I know You have so much more for me…”
As I talk to God and give Him myself and all the loved ones who are weighing on my heart, I feel calmer. My tight chest finally begins to relax as I “expose” my natural weakness to the most loving, capable Father.
My daughter Elena is asleep beside me in a small netted rocker with metal polls for legs. She breathes softly under a knitted blanket made with cool blue and green tones with white in between.
I think of her own soul and her need for comfort when she is tired and ready to sleep.
When Elena (her name means radiant light) is weary, she doesn’t whisper, she cries with a fury and fever that won’t be denied. She doesn’t hide her pain or her need, like I so often do. She doesn’t fear her desires won’t be met or that she’ll be scorned because of them.
No, she finds me with her eyes and her whole face screws up, her nose crinkles like discarded Christmas wrapping paper, her face flushes with rogue hues and she wails for attention until she is comforted. She trusts me to soothe her when she is exhausted or hungry or emotionally hurt. Because she trusts me, she makes her emotions known with candid, innocent clarity.
I can still see her, trying to crawl over a plush pillow and brush past an arresting assortment of colorful plastic toys around her. I laugh because I know the couch pillow, which is fairly small, might as well have been a hill to her small ten month frame and limited mobil agility. She crawled with frustrating effort around the toy obstacles that were bought for her pleasure and enjoyment.
I saw her and took pity on her. The moment she recognized I would pick her up, her wails quieted and she looked up at me with anticipated calm.
Once inside my arms, she nuzzled her nose into my right breast and covered the tender skin with a curled, chubby hand.
She mumbled and cooed softly as I cradled her while she nursed and within a few short minutes, she fell asleep.
Her soul had cried for help, and I came.
Not only had I comforted her by holding her, but I nourished her through the milk my body created…just for her.
Now, I find myself, crying as well. Only my Helper is Someone I cannot see and sometimes cannot feel, yet He has assured me He is always there.
I confess, it’s not always easy to rest in His arms. It’s not always been easy for me to receive the heavenly and healing comfort that is always available to me. Because sometimes, it’s hard for me to trust a spiritual Father when my body wants my five senses appeased with tangible proof.
Even when I intellectually know He is Truth, even when I acknowledge with my mind that He cannot lie and his word is more sure than the sun’s rising every morning…sometimes faith still seems like an obstacle. Sometimes faith seems like an obstruction (like the toys that surrounded Elena), rather than what it actually is, a great gift from my loving heavenly Father.
And I’m tempting to feel condemned for that. But I won’t allow myself to be. He has told me far too many times that He doesn’t condemn me (John 3:16-17).
How I sometimes wish I were like Elena, and when I cry, Jesus would appear in the flesh and scoop me up in his warm, safe, loving and powerful arms.
I confess this to Him, probably for the thousandth time, and like a good Friend, He listens patiently and compassionately as if it were the first time.
As I pour out the internal floodgates of turmoil that had been mercilessly churning and pricking inside me all day, I relax even more, My breaths deepen and become longer and steadier in the atmosphere of his celestial and curative grace.
I find my desires being pacified, like a baby suckling on their mother’s milk until their belly is full, in the presence of his comforting love.
It takes me a moment to realize, my hear rate has dramatically slowed down.
All the tormenting doubt is silent now.
I’ve been in his arms and I didn’t even realize it!
And he said, “My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”-Exodus 33: 14
“The result of comfort is rest.” I felt the Holy Spirit say inside me.
I gazed at my daughter again, sound asleep, with no sign of distress on her placid, caramel colored visage.
Her rhymnthetic breathing is as sound and smooth as still crystal lake water. I watch the slow rise and fall of her small chest.
She is at peace.
She is resting because she had fallen asleep in the most secure place on earth to her, my arms.
She had drifted into subconsciousness under the shadow of my wings. The last thing she saw was the light of my face. My smile flamed like a life-giving image past her pupils and dove into her heart giving deep comforting, assurance to her soul. Her eyes fluttered closed, remembering my maternal smile and the love that inevitably poured through my eyes. Just like the sun stains my eyes when I stare at it too long so much so that even under my eyelids I can see embellishments of its sparkling orange and gold light invading the darkness, so my image branded Elena’s mind as she slept.
And through studying her, I realize, this is what the Holy Spirit has done for us. We can always have this sort of blessed assurance in our hearts. The light of God’s face is always shinning down on us in love. He is our Father, we are his beloved, precious children. Let Him hold you today and still your every fear. There is nothing He wants more, than to comfort you when you’re hurting :
Blessed are those who have learned to acclaim you, who walk in the light of your presence, LORD. -Psalm 89: 15
Whoever rests in the shadow of the Most High God will be kept safe by the Mighty One. -Psalm 91:1 NIRV
Many ask, “Who can show us the good?” Shine the light of Your face upon us, O LORD. -Psalm 4:6
For it was not by their sword that they took the land; their arm did not bring them victory. It was by Your right hand, Your arm, and the light of Your face, because You favored them. -Psalm 44:3
May God be gracious to us and bless us, and cause His face to shine upon us, Selah. -Psalm 67:1
Restore us, O God, and cause Your face to shine upon us, that we may be saved. -Psalm 80:3
I pray the “intangible” arms of God are palpably felt by you today. I pray you experience the sort of divine comfort that always gives rest. May his loving countenance shine through and still every raging storm in your soul, giving you the answers you need. There is no safer, securer or more peaceful place on earth than in communion with God the Father.
~If you would like to experience emotionally life-giving and mind clearing sessions with God about your future goals in the safe presence of another, I do prayerful life-coaching with my clients. I would love to walk alongside Jesus in providing you with the Comfort, inspiration, wisdom and guidance you desire. Click here to fill out a questionnaire and receive a FREE life-coaching consultation call! The first few clients will receive a limited discounted price!
“Healing is impossible in loneliness; it is the opposite of loneliness. Conviviality is healing. To be healed we must come with all the other creatures to the feast of Creation.” (pg.99, “The Body and the Earth”) ― Wendell Berry, The Art of the Commonplace: The Agrarian Essays
“People use drugs, legal and illegal, because their lives are intolerably painful or dull. They hate their work and find no rest in their leisure. They are estranged from their families and their neighbors. It should tell us something that in healthy societies drug use is celebrative, convivial, and occasional, whereas among us it is lonely, shameful, and addictive. We need drugs, apparently, because we have lost each other.” ― Wendell Berry, The Art of the Commonplace: The Agrarian Essays
~For a beautiful song on the light of God’s face by Misty Edwards, click here. I do not own any rights to this music. This was one of the 1st worship songs I listened to as a new believer.
~For more devotions like this, check out my book, Visions of Celestial Love (a journey back to healing grace) on amazon!
God bless you. He loves you with all of his heart!
“Visions of Celestial Love is a book of inspiring quotes and beautiful prose about God’s unconditional love for mankind. The insights of this book help us to understand that it was the Father’s great love for us that made a way for us to have life together with His Son, Jesus Christ. Through it we get a glimpse into the true meaning of Christ’s sacrifice of love expressed through His death, burial and resurrection as God’s magnificent gift of grace to us. His blood made it possible for all those who put their faith in Him to have fellowship with His Father again.
I am confident that at the completion of this book, you will also seek after God with your whole heart and want to be in His presence forever.” —Alice Paige
~The head photo of my daughter Elena was taken by Ruthy Esquivel Photography.
One thing I have asked from the LORD, that I shall seek: That I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, To behold the beauty of the LORD And to meditate in His temple. -Psalm 27:4
Father, I love your gentleness. The sweetness of your Presence is the healing balm to my heart. You are the perfect embrace and shelter for my heart. Your kindness is better than life. I taste You like the softest of fruits that melts into whip cream in my mouth. You are sugar within my soul. You are waves like air lapping at my feet, traveling like fragrant whimsical ripples from incense smoke around my ankles. You are softness. You are gentle love. You are romance in the best way. You are honey in the sun. You are like a cool, refreshing tropical breeze to the sweating, weary brow. You are my Romancer. My Bridegroom. My Daddy. My best Friend. My Master, and my Maker. My deepest conversations have been with You. You sing me to sleep with the music of your breaths and your stilling whispers. Your tangible arms are more pristine than peach and cream alabaster pillars. Your heart is like a fire that blazes and burns; like a warm campfire I long to linger near. I sit by your beating, consuming heart in a rocking chair and you sing over me—swaying me softly back and forth in your pleasure. I am most at home in You. You are my home. And I love the way You love me. Your love changes me. Your love transforms me…and I’m not the same. I’ll never be the same…so long as your love is before my eyes.
“Ashley McClelland presents us with a true cornucopia of modern psalms, personal testimonies, and short stories. She has set out to reveal and unravel some of the most complex heart issues mankind faces in our quest of understanding what true intimacy with God really looks like. Prepare to have your soul massaged and worked on as you read Visions of Celestial Love.” — Jeremy Minard, U.S Navy, Minister, Founder of Servant King Apparel
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