Category: Romance

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My Heart Behind Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul

Dearest reader,

As a woman, I know what it’s like to desire to be wined and dined by a beautiful man. There’s something inside a woman that is made alive when she feels loved. I believe God formed us with tender hearts that blossom by love. He built in us an ethereal need to be savored, valued, and pursued. He created us to be cherished warmly and affectionately, not because we are weak, but because we are meant to gestate and give birth to the most powerful force in existence—heavenly love. However, unconditional love is not the average consistent experience many women have in life, and often many women are left aching or hardened because of it. This is because Jesus was meant to be the lover of our souls. Only he can love us endlessly without fail. And only he can touch the deepest places of our hearts, where no one else can reach, with rejuvenating life.

I pray that as you read this story and devotional questions that your experience would be like going on a date with the Lover of your heart. May the words you read grow in your mind until your imagination is tickled with scenes of beauty; may your spirit be stirred and awakened to the love of God. I pray that as you read you will freely pick of the supple, life-giving fruit of the Holy Spirit who inspires me to write. He is the groomer of the Bride of Christ—the very One who inspired John the Baptist to prepare the way for the Lord by washing the people in repentance so they could receive the King and the kingdom. (Luke 1:76–79) More so, I pray that your relationship with God may be deepened and sweetened by your companionship with our Lord Jesus Christ. May he give you his perfect peace, love, and joy. May you freely receive all that he has for you. Let yourself be deeply loved, healed, seen, delighted in, and lit with the fire of God’s heart by our Savior.

This book is a very intimate look into my personal journey with the courtship ways of Jesus. Many of the word pictures in this story are allegories that describe the ways in which Jesus met my maturing desire to be loved. I wrote the great majority of this book while I traveled through the erratic terrain of singleness. Many times, my emotions were like rocky mountains with edgy rifts. In the deepest fissures, Jesus showed me bright flowers growing through the rock sediments. He unveiled the beauty of my needs and the faithful promises of God to fulfill them (2 Peter 1:4). I started writing this book when I was eighteen. It was born out of my deepest pain, but God took my ashes of longing and unfulfilled desire and gave me an oasis of his love. He bandaged my wound with the ointment of his Spirit. I pray you feel the power of his aching heart in this pungent story. Jesus slowly showed me that my yearning for love was nothing compared to his yearning to love me, and yet my yearning it was everything to him.

May this book bless you as you take the time to enjoy a romantic rendezvous with Jesus. May it be like enjoying a candlelit dinner across the table from your Savior. I pray that you will have the deepest personal relationship with God, and that you will surrender every area of your life to him out of his love growing in you.

I also pray that this book touches the hearts of teenage girls all around the world. If it were not for my experiencing Jesus’ bridegroom love as an adolescent, I would have fallen into the pit traps that I believe are set for many young girls in today’s world. Jesus loved me deeply in the places in my heart that were aching with feminine maturity. I saw that his nature was good and only good. Because I trusted his heart, I waited with expectancy for a husband. At sixteen, I invited him wholehearted into my romantic life. I was led in a dance with my Savior, and he introduced my husband to me at age 24.

Stephen was the first man I had ever dated, and we later married. I could not have picked a better spouse. Stephen’s attentive love has a way of melting me inside. His compliments and affirmation quicken my soul with encouragement, and his kindness draws me close to him. I thank God for a husband who chases after loving me like Christ loves the church. And I prize my husband’s zeal for the truth. (I praise this just as much as I praise his love, because slowly I’ve learned that truth is what makes us free and chases away darkness.) I value so many things about my husband. Before Stephen ever came along, I went on dates with Jesus.

I also pray for women who have gone through years of being married, divorced, or in-between relationships. I pray for the precious souls who have been abused and for those who have lived with interpersonal dysfunction. I lift up to heaven the women who feel guilty or dirty or angry because of things that were done to them in their past, things that they have done, and even for things they are still doing. Jesus wants to meet you at the well today. You are the woman he needs to meet. In the same way, he met with the Samaritan woman who had five failed marriages and was living in adultery (a great cultural shame, especially back in her day). And yet, Father God told Jesus to go meet with her because the Bible says, “He needed to go through Samaria,” (John 4:4) and Jesus only ever did what he saw his Father doing. (John 5:19) Father has set up a healing meeting with his Son for you today. Jesus wants you to let him give you the water that will satisfy all your thirsts as well as cleanse your soul in purity, forgiveness (both being forgiven and forgiving others), hope, joy, rejuvenating peace, and unconditional love.

Dear one, your heart is not only worth being pursued but cherished for all your days. Let Jesus show you how to be a wife, before you are married and also while you are in marriage. He cannot fail and his plans for you are only good. Above all, let him show you how to live in relationship with him. Once you’ve rested by trusting his hand after you’ve gotten to know his heart, you will experience such peace.

Warmest thoughts,

Ashley

“I dare you, I dare you to read this book in a longer time frame then one month. To those mommy’s out there who can’t seem to finish reading a simple Facebook post because their family’s crawling everywhere. I can almost guarantee you’ll find time for this Artwork and then Jesus following…I devoured it in three days, tears flowing and heart throbbing, my first love, whom I’d hardened my heart towards unknowing knocked and knocked as I read inviting me to passion & freedom. The passion to read my bible because I can’t get enough of this man and the freedom because falling in love is first a decision and then is oh so effortless and honestly, I’d forgotten about my first love even while going to church and everything.

My marriage was rough this last year and I mean some light weight cheating on his part (if that’s a thing) & scratching and biting on my part (pretty much). Last week all those pieces fell into the magnificent puzzle that wedlock is with Christ as the center & today and knowing the future holds the same, love seems to have caught on fire literally blazing a trail so fluently and easily. This reconciliation between spouses and one week later THIS book. Not a coincidence because the hardships of marriage had left me feeling a bit hopeless (my heart was flawed before I ever entered it, my own fault being) and really our marital mishaps only shed light on those deep untouched and dirty caves of the heart I’d hidden long ago.

But this book, being alive in words and so articulate, Holy Spirit did breath life into Ashley and you’ll find out that He wants to do the same for yours…Our Jesus is our first love, first husband and first encounter even with God the father himself. He’s the only way and rest assured he’ll pursue you until you are convinced of the same.” -Amazon Reviewer

~To purchase a copy of Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul, click here.

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Trisha and Noble: A Story of Purity in Romance

~This is a snippet of part 3 to my short story series on Trisha and Noble. To read part one, Salvation at Snow Café, click here or to purchase part one and two, in my book, Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul, click here.

…For miles and miles, we traveled on a mostly open highway. I was relieved for the lack of traffic. The mountainous, glinting-snow terrain melted away into lush soft earth. Velvety lakes sparkled opal blue on either side of us, shimmering the heavens. Shamrock green grass sheeted rolling hills that expanded as far as the eye could see. Rainbow flowers grew up like gems and their broad petals stretched open like a delightful yawn to soak in the rays of the sun. Delightful daises speckled the hills like the bubbling laughter of babies.

Trisha kept looking around her in admiration. She commented more than once on how beautiful everything was.

A heavily aromatic vineyard was spotted up ahead. A large white stoned chateau with a red roof sat prominently in the center. Brambling, floral vines climbed up the stone fanning deep violet flowers. Blossoming trees fanned out their polychromous fruit and leaves like peacock feathers.

Trisha gasped and took out her phone for a picture.

She turned the window down and stuck her hand out before snagging a few shots. Afterward, she hung her elbow lazily out the window enjoying the warm fragrant breeze.

“I hope the vineyard we’re going to smells like this,” she said dreamily.

“I hope so too. If only to see you smile like this all day.”

She chortled and then took a picture of me, “for memories,” she said before taking a selfie.

A feeling of peace expanded like a cloud in my heart.

She would like California. She would like the church.

I smiled broadly and reached into the glove compartment box for my dark amber shades. Putting them on, I managed to work my sweater off. Revealing my lean honey-tanned torso in a white v-neck.

Trisha glanced my way and then sharply turned her head away.

“Hey dear?” I asked.

“Yes?”

“Could you grab me a Gatorade from behind?”

“Sure,” she said and unbuckled her seat belt. She pressed her knees on her seat and leaned her torso over searching my snack bag, “which flavor?” she asked.

“Wild berry,” I said, and she took out one.

After handing it to me she refastened her seat belt and admitted, “I have to use the restroom.”

“How about we stop by this nice vineyard up ahead?” I asked with anticipation.

“To use the bathroom?”

“To bless you with a fine lunch and some winetasting,” I said and then added, “and yes, also to use the powder room.”

Trisha lifted her shoulders to her ears, “that would be lovely.”

She sighed with hearty pleasure, and it was like soul stirring music to my ears.

The dirt pathway to the vineyard was lined with tall iridescent flowers that swayed in the gentle breeze. They flowed in the breeze like a colorful sea, and I wondered if the rainbow above the throne in Heaven reflected on the sea of glass by Jesus’ feet like this. The smell of sugared wine and dust intoxicated the air with the ushering of a welcoming embrace. Ripe, bright vines hung juicy red and purple grapes.

A clearing opened between a lime green bush cut in the shape of an arch. I parked the car near several others and took off my shades. The sunlight filtered through the car and hit my back. When I turned toward Tish she just stared.

“Yes dear?” I paused, looking into her almond-shaped eyes.

She voiced, “your eyes are like sky,” she blushed, “I mean…they’re glowing blue.”

I laughed lightly, “they’ve always been that color,” I stated matter-of-factly.

“I suppose it’s the light,” she stated, “it makes them more beautiful.” She unconsciously reached and tousled my summer brown bangs.

My heart caught in my throat as I stopped myself from kissing her wrist.

I leaned back in retreat and that motion seemed to “wake” her up. She took her hand away.

“Maybe,” I said, attempting to speak coolly.

She started fussing with her boots until they came off, “it’s much too warm for these anymore,” she stated, and I checked the temperature on my phone.

“A perfect 70 degrees,” I grinned.

Her dark blue skinny jeans and striped light blue and white long-sleeved shirt complimented the rich pecan brown texture of her smooth skin.

She tied her hair in a back bun and walked outside to the trunk. After she knocked on it I pressed the open button and it unlatched. She unzipped her suitcase while I rolled up the windows. When I got out, she had slipped on a pair of copper tinted flip flops.

“Free feet,” she grinned widely and wiggled her French-tip pedicured toes, “I hadn’t expected to wear these for at least two more months.”

“Welcome to California.”

We found the entrance. A polished cherry wooden door arched between hanging pots of flowing plants.

When I opened it the mosaic windows filtered colorful light inside a quaint gift shop. To our right was a fancy restaurant and to our left was an ornamental mini market of local farm products, and fine jewelry. Unfortunately, it had a mystical influence, and I noted several eastern religious baubles.

We went straight toward the diner, passing a few richly clad folks.

The restaurant was brightly lit with tall windows…the height of an average grown male lining an entire wall.

Behind a rustic deck bar was a hanging list of expensive wine, among more reasonably priced drinks.

Trisha turned to me, “Are you sure Noble? It’s a little pricey.”

“Nothings too pricey for your enjoyment.”

A well-dressed man in an azure button-down shirt with ironed black slacks assisted us, “where would you folks like to eat?” he asked in a warm tone.

His visage was welcoming and his skin was like running caramel. His peppered black and white hair was slicked back neatly.

“Outside,” Trisha said seeing the white cobbled stoned quad with a running swan fountain.

“Excellent choice,” the man said and lead us to a wooden table with a glass-blue center.

We sat in cushioned chairs. Flowers surrounded us on all sides and monarch butterflies fluttered by shaped bushes.

Trisha kept looking around and was silent.

When I asked her what was up, she responded, “I’m taking it all in.”

I scanned the menu and deciding on the roasted quail in mushroom parmesan sauce with wild rice and steamed vegetables. Trisha choose the seared ahi tuna salad with berry vinaigrette dressing and buttered rye bread.

Our waiter, whose name we discovered was Rameriez asked us, “how about drinks?”

Trisha chose flavored sparkling water and I settled on the house red wine, “We’ll have the whole bottle please…and two glasses.”

Ramierez pressed his pointer finger to his thumb to amplify his words, “superb choice sir.”

I winked at Trisha when the waiter walked away.

“Noble, how do you expect to drive if you drink?”

“I figured we could walk around a bit after lunch until the alcohol passes…maybe give it an hour or so? I’m no light weight dear. When I wasn’t saved it took a lot to get me wasted. Besides, I saw a pathway around the vineyard on our way in.”

“I could also drive my four hours in,” she offered kindly before questioning, “how many more hours have we to go before we reach Kris’s house?”

I checked my wrist watch, “let’s see…. we left home at a little before 4am and its 2:20. That’s a little over ten hours behind us. We have about 8 more to go.”

“You’ve really been a trooper,” she complimented.

“It’s easy to do when you have good company.”

“Thank you for saying that even though I’ve been asleep for at least six of those hours. You’re always good company, but I think you should sleep the whole time I drive.”

“I think I will,” I said feeling a yawn coming along. I let is escape and lifted the back of my hand to it.

Trisha excused herself and sat by the swan fountain. Tiny droplets of water splashed on her skin and she seemed to be enjoying the coolness of it.

The scene around us was breathtaking but I couldn’t seem to take my eyes off the loveliest article around us…the woman that I truly loved.

I leaned my chin on my folded hands and stared freely, admiring the deep and elated feeling in my chest. She was a painting in motion. I let my eyes silhouette her curvy frame.

I had never known love.

I thought I did, when I was in the world. But of all the girls I had dated and slept around with, it hadn’t been out of love. Not even close. It was a selfish flesh feast on both ends. They were all prestigious tall sexy blondes or light brunettes with long legs and short skirts or leather tights. We had all hung around the same scene of popularity, wealth and rat-race ambition. Every relationship was built on self-absorption—using the other person to advance career by making a scene and exciting the tabloids. Each new level of success left me more hallow.

Then this saint leads me to God through Jesus Christ. For the first time, I knew what it was like to be loved into wholeness. I had such freedom in forgiveness and it led to captivating devotion…a personal choice to crown Jesus not only Savior, but Lord of my life. I didn’t know He was so good that He would give me such a life-giving and pure relationship with a beautiful woman.

Purity had always seemed dull to me before, like an intrusive wall that blocked pleasure. But now I discovered it was, in fact, the deepest pleasure. Pleasure of the soul that led to effortless self-sacrifice. Eternal pleasure, because it was done God’s way.

I wouldn’t exploit her sensitive heart, knowing I was her first relationship. I would guard her chaste, unsullied innocence. I would pursue her for a covenant relationship.

I thought of the rose gold diamond-studded ring hidden in my suitcase and released a tightly held breath.

We had only been dating for a few months. I didn’t want to scare her off, but in the same breath, I knew I wanted her for a lifetime. I wanted to love her right. I wanted to love her forever. So why wait?

Oh Father, please soften the soil of her heart to it. I feel your blessing on our relationship. But she’s still fearful in some ways.

Trisha leaned over the fountain and glided her hand along the clear water in cursory circles.

I heard Ramierez behind me before I saw him. He bent over and laid a scrumptious looking quail before me, set atop steaming wild rice and colorful vegetables. The parmesan sauce dripped over the cooked bird and soaked into the other food.

Just the way I like it.

The smell of the food sent a stab of pain in my gut and all of a sudden, I was famished! Trisha noticed and returned to the table as he set her plate.

“Enjoying the view ma’am?”

“It’s lovely.”

Rameriez smiled, “enjoy your food,” he said after setting her sparkling water beside her and then pouring two iridescent glasses half full of red wine.

“We will, thanks,” I said and offered to bless the food.

After prayer, we both ate quietly. Only the sound of our savoring hums and yums conversed between us.

Before long our plates were empty and our bellies full.

“That was probably the best meal I’ve tasted in a long time.” I said wiping my hands on an embroider pearl cloth napkin.

Trisha patted her belly and sighed, “I agree.”

She took gulps of her sparkling water and a breeze picked up, bouncing loose tendrils of her coiled, nutmeg dark hair.

I sniffed my wine glass and stirred it by moving my hands in small controlled motions.

After taking a sip I smacked my lips, “rich.”

“Strong?” Trisha questioned.

I was honest, “probably strong for you. You shouldn’t have much.”

She reached for her glass and smelled the robust flavor precariously. 

She took a tiny sip and then another. Her face screwed, “is red wine always so bitter?”

I chortled at her naivety and inexperience, “it’s not grape juice dear.”

She smiled, “no, I guess not.”

She took some more sips before putting down the glass a quarter full.

“I’m done,” she said.

I finished mines off and poured myself another glass. She let me enjoy the flavor of the richest wine I had tasted before leaving my life of sin behind.

“He saves the best for last,” I mused remembering the wedding feast in Canaan. Jesus’ first miracle. Such exuberance and opulent generosity was seen as sacrilege to some. But to me, it spoke of the copious wealth of the creativity of God and the bounty of His goodness. I decided to stop after the second glass and left the bottle on the table after paying the check and tip.

We strolled through a dappled path and savored the scenery. Tree leaves rustled and cast dancing shapes of light and shadow on the trail.

Trisha bent down frequently to sniff flowers. We stayed almost 5 minutes by some lavender bushes while she admired the smell. Bees buzzed unbothered by her face.

I tucked my hands in my pockets and praised God silently.

Father thank you for an easy, beautiful trip. Thank you for Trish. Thank you for your love, you display it every day to me in faithful and new ways. I’m so at peace because of knowing you. I love you Father. Thank you for Eve, for Trish getting to minister to her. Draw her to you Lord. Show her how good you are…that your forgiveness is free to us because Jesus paid for it. Give her hope and joy. Convict her heart to believe Holy Spirit. Nobody comes to Jesus unless you draw them. Show me how to love Trisha right. Give me grace to honor her, uphold her, be good to her. I so appreciate you Lord. I know you hear and that you withhold nothing good. So, I rest and rejoice in you.

I closed my eyes and felt the warm presence of the Holy Spirit inside of me. Kisses from my Father.

I sighed slowly and sucked in the air around me through my mouth.

How good it is to know you. To be held by you, faithful friend.

When I opened my eyes, Trisha was standing beside me, her eyes closed. She opened them and said with a reflective smile, “I was thanking God too.”

I chortled, “how did you know I was?”

“I just did.” She responded and we continued.

Joined by the Spirit. I remembered Ephesians 4:  There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called; 5 one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.

We walked on for about thirty minutes before circling around to the car. It was so nice to be able to stretch my legs after being cramped up in the car.

Trisha asked for the keys, and I handed them to her. As she adjusted her seat and the car mirrors I leaned back and kicked off my shoes.

I was sleepier than I realized and hardly mumbled two sentences before drifting off…

~I hope you enjoyed this brief sneak peek!

“This was the most captivating, read I had in a while. It warmed my heart, made me feel loved, and gave me a desire to want a more intimate relationship.” -Staryln

“Ashley has a very talented gift of weaving words together that display tenderness, compassion and purity. Each story reveals the heart of Jesus towards His children. As you read each one you can see past the characters and feel the depth of Jesus’ heart, as well as the longing for a deeper relationship with Jesus inside yours.” -Everesta

“This book is simply wonderful. Deliciously descriptive, it nourishes the soul with fresh revelation of God’s love for humanity. This collection of short stories may challenge your thinking about what true intimacy looks like, while making your heart yearn to daily experience the Perfect Love described within its pages. It invites you into a world created by Love Himself, where there’s no mistaking that His love is not only unconditional and never-failing, but also deeply personal and precious to Him. Get ready to experience the purpose, pleasure, and power of real love!” -Amazon Reviewer

~To purchase a copy of, Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul, click here.

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Exciting News!

My literary agent’s husband recently finished my whole book and wrote this brilliant summary for it ❤ . I feel so blessed! This has been a two year journey and the manuscript is almost ready to present to publishers.

Synopsis:

This allegorical fantasy romance begins with Noelani on a date with Jesus Christ (in the flesh). Based loosely on Revelation 22:17: The [Holy] Spirit and the bride (the church, believers) say, “Come.” And let the one who hears say, “Come.” And let the one who is thirsty come; let the one who wishes take and drink the water of life without cost. -Revelation 22:17 AMP

Jesus takes her through a series of settings and circumstances as she begins to realize his deep love for her. Beginning at the local coffee shop, she witnesses as Jesus talks to the barista and changes her whole life right there.

Then they visit a nearby lake and watch the stars and water and trees transform into phantasmagoric visions while she is transported into heaven at a castle like the one in the Cinderella ball. She dances with Jesus and later falls asleep in her private bedroom in the castle. Jesus talks with her and introduces her to The Father and continues to woo her, asking her to marry him. Finally, she says yes.

Part two begins in Noelani’s kitchen with her friend and Jesus as a visiting plumber who has tea and asks and answers questions of them both. As the discussion progresses, Noelani gains more insight and philosophical/theological understanding that Jesus expresses and verifies in the Bible.

Then a short walk to the local elementary school where Jesus shows Noelani how to minister to a small immigrant child from Africa. They part and she is no longer able to meet Jesus in the flesh.

Emphasizing the love of God and the continued effort of Jesus and the Father to restore sinners to a state of grace. The main emphasis of this story is to clarify the Christian love relationships between husband and wife and dispel the often-misunderstood concepts and behaviors of human sexuality.

Discussion questions at each chapter ending provide a format for group discussion. Additional references include recommended music and scripture end notes.

“But I came by and saw you there, helplessly kicking about in your own blood. As you lay there, I said, ‘Live!’ And I helped you to thrive like a plant in the field. You grew up and became a beautiful jewel. Your breasts became full, and your body hair grew, but you were still naked. And when I passed by again, I saw that you were old enough for love. So I wrapped my cloak around you to cover your nakedness and declared my marriage vows. I made a covenant with you, says the Sovereign Lord, and you became mine. “Then I bathed you and washed off your blood, and I rubbed fragrant oils into your skin. I gave you expensive clothing of fine linen and silk, beautifully embroidered, and sandals made of fine goatskin leather. I gave you lovely jewelry, bracelets, beautiful necklaces, a ring for your nose, earrings for your ears, and a lovely crown for your head. And so you were adorned with gold and silver. Your clothes were made of fine linen and costly fabric and were beautifully embroidered. You ate the finest foods—choice flour, honey, and olive oil—and became more beautiful than ever. You looked like a queen, and so you were!”

-God in Ezekiel 16:6-13 NLT.

~To discover my original novella that inspired this new book, click here.

“As I read, I quickly became enthralled with this book, so beautifully written in the language of love. Each of these short stories so accurately reflects the romantic and wooing heart of the Bridegroom which draws you to Himself into a deeper place of love and intimacy. If you have not yet experienced romantic intimacy with God, I’m confident that this book will set you on course. It’s bound to warm your soul and whet your desire for your own heart-to-heart conversations and experiences with God. The author creatively ministers to the soul, bringing truth to light in the most tangible ways; you will feel that God is speaking directly to you, and He most certainly is! Some stories caused me to be drawn away into remembrance of my own experiences and conversations with God that have freed my soul; others caused me to reevaluate my heart’s commitment to my first Husband and cry out for forgiveness; and yet others simply took me on a delightful and exciting adventure of what the beginning of a holy, unadulterated love looks like – so refreshing to the soul! I commend the author for using her creative gifting to share personal reflections and heart intimacies which I know could only come from the deep well of Father’s heart. I highly recommend this book as a must read!” -Marina Garcia, worshipper, mother, wife, health cheerleader.

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First Kiss

~This preview is taken from my upcoming Christian fiction book, At the Time for Love, a book based off Ezekiel 16:6-14. This novella is meant to introduce young women to the intimate love of Jesus while transparently discussing the topic of: romantic relationships, the often tumultuous and confusing emotions of teenage girls (as well as their blossoming longing for mature love), sex, and above all, the tender Bridegroom love of Jesus. When I was 16 years old, Jesus came after my heart and I wrote my first romantic story, I Do, about being his bride while listening to the song Hero by Enrique Iglesias. Because of his pure love, I walked through my young adult life whole and avoided much heartbreak and compromise. Later, I married the man of my dreams (my 1st boyfriend). My passion is to bring purity and sexual healing back to this generation. I pray Jesus uses this book to save young women in the same way He saved me. This book is meant for girls ages 17+.

Rippling, warm sensations traveled through my body before giving way to placid serenity, as he looked at me with sonographic accuracy. It was like he could see through me. Even though I was bundled in clothing, I felt naked before him. His eyes pleasantly burned through all my layers. Only, it wasn’t a sexual stripping, it was deeper, more personal, more exposing, more vulnerable. He dove into my heart and my pulse quickened and then slowed when all I saw was admiration and pure joy shining through his eyes and spreading across his entire visage.

He loved me.

Adjusting himself, he unlopped his arm from across my shoulders and pulled out a small velvety black box from his right pocket. My breath caught and he slowly took my right hand in his, lifting it up. I held my breath and watched as he carefully set the box down in his lap before tenderly taking off my glove. Time seemed frozen as he briefly but gently stroked the back of my fingers with his thumb. Our skin on skin contact caused tingling flashes of pleasure to shoot up my arm.

The frozen winter wonderland around us became void in the light of his face and shinning ocher eyes. His butterscotch skin was warmer than the sweet cup of hot chocolate I had drank. My heart was heard in my ears and all else was silent.

Is he proposing? I thought, feeling like I would simultaneously faint to the floor and fly to the moon.

I saw a muscle work in James’s jaw and his mouth moved slightly as if he wanted to say something. He slowly let go of my hand and opened the box. A brilliant ruby, chiseled in the shape of a blooming rose with gold wire around the delicate petals was seen. It was engrafted on a rose gold band and the pointed leaves on each end were silver. The veins on the leaflets were rose gold as well.

I gasped in awe!

“Merry Christmas. If you’ll have me, this will be my engagement ring to you, Rose,” he said slipping the ring on my ring finger, “I vow that I’ll love you forever with all my heart and seek to love you as Christ loves his church. I promise to be faithful to you, to pray for you, to cherish you, to be a channel of God’s goodness, truth, and grace in your life.”

My hand and body trembled as he slipped the ring on my right ring finger. A scene from our first, private ride together in his truck came back. I remembered the vow he told me he had made with God concerning his future wife; “I plan to stay single until God shows me the right one. I pray for her almost every night… whoever she is. I’ve promised to never tell another woman that I love her, or kiss, until I know it’s her.”

All fear of losing him evaporated. I wasn’t alone. I wasn’t abandoned. I was loved and always would be. A deep sense of security washed over me like a tide of warm water from the Atlantic sea. It soothed my soul, like sacred oil coating my skin.

“It’s beautiful,” I said choking on tears. I studied the expensive jewelry as I lifted my hand closer to my face. I put my hand back down and saw James’s staring at me with unflinching eyes.

Tossing aside restraint, I leaped beside him with one quick swing. I caught the sides of his face with my hands and rubbed my fingers across his smooth skin, savoring the feel of his flesh. I saw him with my hands and felt the strong muscles in his jaw and cheeks. I allowed myself the pleasure of running my hands through his coarse hair for the first time and giggled even as tears blinded my vision.

“So tightly curly,” I commented. closed my eyes as tears slipped down them and dripped on his arm and mine, “just like I imagined in my dreams.”

I opened my eyes again when I felt James play with my hair.

“Silk, just like I imagined.”

My body trembled more and my lips quivered.

“James,” I breathed thickly and slid my hands to the back of his neck, intertwining my fingers, I gently pulled him closer.

His hands dropped and he flinched his face away. When he moved to unlace my fingers, I turned his face back toward mine.

“James,” I said again, staring at him with bullseye vision. My sea blue eyes misted over, and my voice sounded like a soft cry, “oh, James.”

I tipped my chin up even as I firmly pulled his down.

Our lips touched, lightly at first and then I smooshed them together, closing my eyes to savor the feeling.

I kissed him, feeling the softness of his lips and the hardness of his teeth. I kissed him again, unbothered by his conservative, unresponsive lips. I felt his warm exhales waft against the groove of my philtrum before falling down my lower face to lightly caress the tower of my neck.

When he started kissing me back, I melted against him and felt lost in a euphoric dream. He surrounded my body in his arms and snuggled me tightly. His arms slowly moved behind me until finding their place. With one hand, he cupped my head and with the other he steadied my mid-back.

Electrical sensations exploded in my heart like lightning escaping the veil of heavy, moist rain clouds. The seconds I sat wrapped up in him felt lost in eternity.

He brusquely pulled away and I opened my eyes.

I took my hands from around him and wiped the trails of tears from my cheeks and chin. I could see remnants of my tears lining his cheeks like glassy water in irregular patterns. .

He shook his head softly, “Autumn…” he gasped, his eyes aglow like I had never seen them.

“I thought it was Rose, or darling?” I gave a brisk chuckle.

“It’s all three.”

“And Sweet One,” I said with a crumpled smile, still tasting him on my tongue.

“Four then,” he said seriously before softening, “and much more to come.”

“Now you can talk to me. Yes?” I said batting my eyes whimsically.

I could tell he was surprised by my audaciousness. “I love you, but I’m not comfortable with this.”

“Why not?” I questioned, sure that our kiss was innocuous.

My eyes searched his like a thirsty +woman leaning over a well. Curious about love, I wanted to drink from him.

I was sure I captivated him as much as he captivated me. His eyes swam across my visage, studying my features. Being under his loving gaze was almost hallucinogenic to my heart. Under his perusal, I felt the fogging warmth inside my cheeks flush across my face and even meet the bridge of my nose. I knew I was smeared across with the blushing evidence of virginity. When his vision settled on my eyes, he exhaled audibly as love poured from him. I guessed our kiss had aroused a flame in him that could spread like wildfire if not tamed.

With humble poise, James tentatively placed his index finger on my neck, “I can feel your pulse.”

“You can always feel a person’s pulse on their neck…”

“Your heart is racing.” He stressed.

“As it should be. This was my first kiss,” I spoke in a sweet, hushed voice, “how blessed am I to have only kissed the man I truly love.”

I felt the tremor in his finger before he withdrew it. It was the first time I had ever seen him tremble. I didn’t know my touch could do that to him. I didn’t know anything could do that to him. He was smitten at the core with love for me.

I bravely reached my hand out and felt his neck. I let my fingers flutter against his skin.

“I can feel yours too,” I said softly and then licked my lips.

He firmly took hold of my wrist and gently pulled my hand down, silently requesting I keep our unspoken courtship protocol.

“This was my first kiss as a saved man.”

“So, we are both sort of in the same boat?”

“Sort of…”

We both fell silent and after a few seconds I shrugged my shoulders, “I suppose, regardless it will be our last kiss for a while. After all, you are going away.”

James slightly nodded his head.

I gave a puckish grin, “I’m glad I stole one before you did.”

We both laughed and in our jest, I marveled at this newfound boldness breaking free inside of me.

We sat and talked for another hour before I began shivering uncontrollably. With no more hot chocolate to take the cold edge off, James insisted he drive me back home. Even though I knew I would be warmer in his truck, I didn’t want my time with him to be shortened. Eventually, I relented and as he drove down the country road leading to my parent’s house, I prayed we would be together sooner than Spring…

“But I came by and saw you there, helplessly kicking about in your own blood. As you lay there, I said, ‘Live!’ And I helped you to thrive like a plant in the field. You grew up and became a beautiful jewel. Your breasts became full, and your body hair grew, but you were still naked. And when I passed by again, I saw that you were old enough for love. So I wrapped my cloak around you to cover your nakedness and declared my marriage vows. I made a covenant with you, says the Sovereign Lord, and you became mine. “Then I bathed you and washed off your blood, and I rubbed fragrant oils into your skin. I gave you expensive clothing of fine linen and silk, beautifully embroidered, and sandals made of fine goatskin leather. I gave you lovely jewelry, bracelets, beautiful necklaces, a ring for your nose, earrings for your ears, and a lovely crown for your head. And so you were adorned with gold and silver. Your clothes were made of fine linen and costly fabric and were beautifully embroidered. You ate the finest foods—choice flour, honey, and olive oil—and became more beautiful than ever. You looked like a queen, and so you were!”

-God in Ezekiel 16:6-13 NLT.

~For a fiction novella on godly love, check out my book, Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul (Pleasure That Makes You Whole). It explores the holy Bridegroom love of Jesus for the church on amazon! To purchase a copy or read reviews on it, click here. You can also read the first chapter free on my Free Inspiration page!

“This book is simply wonderful. Deliciously descriptive, it nourishes the soul with fresh revelation of God’s love for humanity. This collection of short stories may challenge your thinking about what true intimacy looks like, while making your heart yearn to daily experience the Perfect Love described within its pages. It invites you into a world created by Love Himself, where there’s no mistaking that His love is not only unconditional and never-failing, but also deeply personal and precious to Him. Get ready to experience the purpose, pleasure, and power of real love!” -Amazon Reviewer

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A Love Relationship

Jesus You are the King Who left his throne, became a Knight and won my heart.

A love relationship with Jesus is greater than any and all romances combined.

You, aren’t just a King of some lush country or nation on earth…no, You are the King of Heaven, the Creator of the heavens and the earth.

You own it all: the cosmos, the fish in the sea, the richness of every land, the specks of sand on the shore. You came down to earth as a Man to serve the apple of your eye (your beloved) and to destroy her enemy.

Gloriously shinning You awoke the deepest parts of me. In the same voice that You used to awaken Lazarus from death You gazed at me with eyes of warm consuming fire and said to every dead place in my soul, “Live!”

You fought the enemies of my soul without relenting.

You defeated guilt, shame, condemnation, feelings of inferiority, hopelessness, depression and many others.

Your steadfast love captured my heart.

Your faithfulness caused me to trust again and in the light of your radiant love I opened up like a blooming flower.

You showed me what it’s like to be a woman: cherished, adored, loved, a princess destined to become a queen.

You quieted me with Your love.

You gave me rest…

For centuries, the female heart has burned with desire for the lasting pleasure of unchanging love. In the course of time, civilizations have risen and fallen, yet the longing for tangible intimacy has never faded. Millions of lyrics have been written to the passionate tune of this fluid yearning.

Unfortunately, few people find the lasting love they’ve longed for, even as children. Life, education, and societal pressures transform what was once a tangible hope into a mythical fairy tale. Industries have reaped unlimited monetary gain from the erosion of this hope. Billions of girls grow up to become women who have long since tossed their dreams of true love in the trash bin of cynicism. Countless others have buried their ache of unmet desire under the disappointment of failed relationships and hopelessness.

Despite most women’s best attempts, this starved craving remains alive, like a stimulating aroma. This ethereal hope goes back to the first relationship, in a place of being so “seen” and “lovingly known” that “she” was naked and unashamed.

This novella was not written to add salt to the gaping wound of unsatisfied need. It was written to satisfy the need completely. Let Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul introduce you to a lasting relationship with Transcendent Love, where reality becomes sweeter than your dreams.

~To purchase a copy of my novella on divine romance, click here.

“Romantic Rendezvous is a beautiful invitation into intimacy with Jesus! Ashley has done a masterful job of creating stories that depict the heart of the Father. I have truly been blessed by this book! As I read each story, I felt the closeness of Jesus and had continual reminders of how deep the Fathers love is for me. From the very first chapter, I felt the flame of my heart be rekindled with God’s goodness and love. This book is a must read!” -Jessica Leon

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His Fulfilling Love

Holiness equals happiness.

Purity equals pleasure.

The world teaches the opposite of this. Almost every time I turn on the television or listen to a (secular) love song on the radio I hear and see the damaging way culture is training people to find gratification. People cling and grasp at others for fleshly fulfillment…but there is no gratifying the flesh. And such cycles only lead to hurting others or yourself in the name of “love.” We tend to seek wholeness in others because the Father built us for relationship. Aristotle summed this up wisely when he wrote, “it is the nature of desire not to be satisfied, and most men live only for the gratification of it.”

When I was 16 years old I was filled with the Holy Spirit. It was only until that moment that I began to receive the love of God (Romans 5:5). This love filled my heart like balmy, thick sap and flowed into the cracks of my broken places, brining the fragrance of Christ. It was truly a supernatural work, one that I could never do. I remember sitting in my high school journalism class next to my friend Hazel and feeling the Holy Spirit move in my heart. I began to scribble in my notebook and drew a picture of my soul. There was a Man inside cooking, then He began rearranging furniture, adding beautiful things and tending to a garden outside of a pleasant looking cottage. I could tell He was making himself comfortable inside of me. I turned to Hazel and showed her the drawing, “I see Jesus in me.”

Soon an amazing thing began to happen…I found fulfillment. This incredible peace came not because of popularity, or dating a boy, or because I had accomplished some great feat. It came because God was intimate with me. Slowly, He wooed me and there was such inner pleasure within me that I became almost unoffendable (if that’s a word). My soul was like a thousand rolling hills of purple lavender fields. The scents of His Presence was weighty and heady like wine. And I was stolen away into a place called the Kingdom of Heaven. There…He made a proposal and I accepted my identity and covenant in Christ.

God’s love is so deep, so wide, so comforting. I once described His eyes like bowls of cinnamon set on fire. He became everything and everything became nothing without Him. I loved others deeply, from my heart (1 Peter 1:22). I found everything the heart of man truly longs for in our Creator…who I found wasn’t distant and angry. He was my personal Friend, my Master, my Father & then He told me He was my husband (Isaiah 54:5).I married my now husband, Stephen McClelland as a virgin. I had never kissed anyone before him or dated anyone before him. But it wasn’t because I had a set of religious rules in front of me and worked hard to control my flesh. To be honest, I’m not that strong and that kind of method doesn’t work. Paul said it is good for our hearts to be strengthened by grace (Hebrews 13:9). Father set a feast of divine pleasure in my heart. It was heavenly pleasure that kept me away from sinful fleshly pleasure.

Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul, is a collection of tender short stories that Jesus used to romance my soul with pure intimacy. It was these sweet moments with Him that saved me from the traps that were set for me in my youth. I am so excited to be able to offer this book on amazon. You can check it out by clicking here.

My prayer for every man and women that reads this, is that they will be drenched in the warm love of God as if they were under a spiced waterfall. And that through this… they would fall in love with Him. ❤️🌈 There is no lasting fulfillment or rest for your soul until it is found in relationship with Him. abundant life begins with Him. The bread of peace is in His hand and He’s a generous Giver.

xoxo

“This book is simply wonderful. Deliciously descriptive, it nourishes the soul with fresh revelation of God’s love for humanity. This collection of short stories may challenge your thinking about what true intimacy looks like, while making your heart yearn to daily experience the Perfect Love described within its pages. It invites you into a world created by Love Himself, where there’s no mistaking that His love is not only unconditional and never-failing, but also deeply personal and precious to Him. Get ready to experience the purpose, pleasure, and power of real love!” -Danielle Sanders

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Holy Lover

There is a cry of a lover in my heart.

It’s a faithful song with rays more golden than sunlight.

It’s the sweet singing of a bride awaiting her bridegroom.

This song twirls through the windpipes of heaven and strums from the stringed instruments of eternity.

It’s the beckoning smile of a beloved’s face.

It’s more melodious than birdsong in early Spring.

There is no deeper intimacy than sharing breath and body with this holy Lover.

He lives inside of my spirit and my heart pulses with the warmth of his presence even as I long for the tangible warmth of his physical skin. (John 1:14)

This holy Bridegroom who has stolen my heart and keeps it safe inside his chest as if I were within the lock and key of a vault.

His whispers enter my mind as He shares his thoughts with me.

They are always thoughts that bring me peace and life when the storms, troubles or worries of life are present.

His Holy Spirit kisses melt more sweetly than sugar on my hearts’ tongue. (Romans 5:5)

I crave His company more than all others.

I desire everything about Him.

No one from the outside looking in can truly understand or know this love without experiencing it.

This is the most faithful love, because it will never die.

This love has conquered death.

My heart is stirred by a noble theme as I recite my verses to the king; my tongue is the pen of a skillful writer. You are the most handsome of men; grace has anointed your lips, since God has blessed you forever. -Psalm 45:1-2 BSB

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The Great Worth of Man to God

~This excerpt is taken from the revised version of my new book, Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul:

“I became a man just like you…except male and without sin. But make no mistake, my body was like unto yours.”

The scripture of David sweetened my mind like fine sugar—dusting my thoughts with saccharinity. Was this truly how David felt when he confessed that he was fearfully and wonderfully made?

Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out;
 you formed me in my mother’s womb.
I thank you, High God—you’re breathtaking!
 Body and soul, I am marvelously made!
 I worship in adoration—what a creation!
You know me inside and out,
 you know every bone in my body;
You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit,
 how I was sculpted from nothing into something.
Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth;
 all the stages of my life were spread out before you… —Psalm 139:14–16a MSG

“You were made for me and for my Father’s good pleasure,” Jesus said.

I gazed toward him and I saw he was looking out at the waves with me. His warm brown eyes aglow like amber by a fire drew me in. My breath caught and I was being lulled into him. Slowly and yet quickly I was sucked into him. Graced with wings I began to fly into his ocher eyes and soar upon the aromatic winds of his soul. Suddenly I was towering over lush, emerald-green mountains carpeted with jade spring grass. Polychromatic flowers like melted rainbows splashed across the mountains like glinting, colorful diamonds. The sky was more expansive than a thousand planets and stretched forth like gleaming still waters of opal blue. The clearness of it was like glass. Cumulus clouds formed puffy hills like burning peach marble and mirrored the hazy autumnal colors of the morning. Jesus’ eyes were more majestic than thousands of waterfalls brimming with translucent waves. In those eyes I saw eternity, and streets of shining gold like transpicuous fire. I beheld oceans of the most pristine blue. Foamy waves swelled, rose, and then splashed down, releasing whimsical laughter with each eye-catching crash. The heart of Jesus arrested me with beauty.

“Do you see it?” Jesus asked.

“Yes,” I barely managed to whisper.

Everything within him was full of life. All of creation seemed diffused with light from an otherworldly presence. Not only was it beautiful, it was alive. It wasn’t alive apart from him, but it was alive with him. It was as if his DNA was in the genetic makeup of everything. Creation took on a new form. It was cloaked with a brilliance that mirrored moonlight. There was a glow around the animals, the blue whales, the flimsy spiders’ webs, the fluttering butterflies, the legs of speeding cheetahs.

“Do you think that is amazing?” he asked.

I nodded. “More than I’ve realized. What did I just see Lord?”

“You saw a little taste of the restoration of all things. The glory in which creation dwelt before the fall—a glance at redemption—the way the Father and I originally intended the world to be: without sin, without killing, without sickness or disease and without fear. But full of my Father’s glory. This is what my Father will do again when he creates the new earth.”

The emancipated world was more breathtaking that I could have imagined. Passages from Isaiah 11 mirror the reality of the glorious goodness that await the redeemed sons and daughters of God.

I took a few thoughtful breaths for measure and tried to reimagine what I saw. I wanted to live in it now. Everything in my body pined for such a world.

“The world came through me. For by me were all things were made and I hold everything together.[i] The Holy Spirit, the One you call your best friend, saw what was in the Father’s heart before he spoke his Word out. For who can know the thoughts of man except the spirit that dwells within him?[ii] The same is true for God. The Spirit took what was in us and when he brooded over the waters, he gave power to the Word, to the heart of God. He went to work. He is the Father’s life-giving Spirit.”

“Wow,” I voiced quietly. An incoherent sound came from my lips as a new thought caused my eyebrows to lift.

“If you think what you’ve seen is amazing then imagine how amazing it was when we fulfilled the Father’s desire when he said, ‘Let us make man in our image and after our likeness.’”

My eyes flared open as a spark of light was seen in Jesus’ body. It was more brilliant than any light I had ever seen.

“You see, when God made the heavens and the earth, the Spirit gave life to his Word—Me—and creation was made the way God intended. But when God formed you and all of his children, he took from out of himself personally. He spoke to himself. He molded a child from the clay of the earth and breathed his Spirit into his child, Adam. Instead of just speaking out, he hand-formed Adam like a potter does with clay and breathed the breath of life into man until Adam became a living soul.[iii] And then he designed Adam in a way that was extremely special. He gave Adam the intellectual and emotional properties for a father-child relationship. This is what the soul of man was created for. By placing his Spirit in man, he put his inner thoughts and heart in man. This has always been our Father’s will. For an everlasting family relationship with man. This is why even after they sinned, Father pursued man. His plan has not changed. He still writes his law, his thoughts and heart, on the heart of men who come to him.[iv] He still gives his Holy Spirit in the new covenant. He has never stopped being good to man and he has made a way for the original relationship that he had with Adam and Eve to be the same for every man through my sacrifice.”

The way Jesus’ tone changed when he spoke Adam’s name alarmed me. There was a thickness and a weight when he breathed the name.

Clear trails began to gather in Jesus’ golden-brown eyes, shimmering like pools made of quartz. To my surprise he started to silently weep. The compassion in him was coming off like healing waves from a hot spring. The sweetness of it was like honey and the pained desire of it was almost devastating.

 I remembered his tears when he agonized with moans from a breaking heart.

“Oh Jerusalem, Jerusalem, the city that kills the prophets and stones God’s messengers! How often I wanted to gather your children together as a hen protects her chicks beneath her wings, but you wouldn’t let me!” —Matthew 23:37 NLT

In a split second, I felt the tiniest fraction of his deep compassion and longing for his sons and daughters. It was a sacrificial love, a love that laid everything down and spared no expense. I could hardly bare the strength of it.

“My dear, if you really knew how much my Father invested himself in you, you wouldn’t gape at creation the way you would gape at man. You would look in the mirror and never feel self-doubt again because you would know that I dwell within you. You saw a foretaste of redeemed creation in my eyes. The wonder of redeemed man through my eyes is infinitely better. Every man was made to be fully alive in me.”

[i] Colossians 1:16-17

[ii] 1 Corinthians 2:11

[iii] Genesis 2:7

[iv] Jeremiah 31:33

~To purchase a copy of Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul, click here:

“As I read, I quickly became enthralled with this book, so beautifully written in the language of love. Each of these short stories so accurately reflects the romantic and wooing heart of the Bridegroom which draws you to Himself into a deeper place of love and intimacy. If you have not yet experienced romantic intimacy with God, I’m confident that this book will set you on course. It’s bound to warm your soul and whet your desire for your own heart-to-heart conversations and experiences with God. The author creatively ministers to the soul, bringing truth to light in the most tangible ways; you will feel that God is speaking directly to you, and He most certainly is! Some stories caused me to be drawn away into remembrance of my own experiences and conversations with God that have freed my soul; others caused me to reevaluate my heart’s commitment to my first Husband and cry out for forgiveness; and yet others simply took me on a delightful and exciting adventure of what the beginning of a holy, unadulterated love looks like – so refreshing to the soul! I commend the author for using her creative gifting to share personal reflections and heart intimacies which I know could only come from the deep well of Father’s heart. I highly recommend this book as a must read!” -Marina Garcia, Worship Leader

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Your Heart: The Anointed and Flourishing Resting Place

~A vivid snippet from the revised version of my book, Romantic Rendezvous for The Soul. May you come to understand and experience the rich and faithful love of Jesus as He dwells in His new glorious temple…your recreated heart. He will never leave you, He will never forsake you. He lives in you. (Colossians 1:27)

Enjoy this worship song as you read: Chambers by Catherine Mullins (I don’t own any rights to the music)

My beloved one, both handsome and winsome, you are pleasing beyond words. Our resting place is anointed and flourishing, like a green forest meadow bathed in light. Rafters of cedar branches are over our heads and balconies of pleasant-smelling pines. —Song of Solomon 1:16–17 TPT

He stood and extended his hand for me to take.

I felt like the woman caught in the act of adultery. Mercy washed over me in silky light, like the waves from his robe. He didn’t condemn me. There were no accusations. There was no stone in his hand. (John 8:11)

In fact, his hand seemed like an extension of his heart—promising to heal me even before I vowed to commit myself to him in the way he desired.

There was no cost for his healing. He freely offered to make me whole, with no hidden stipulations. Such grace empowered me and I felt my bones were stronger somehow. I felt like spring grass soaking in solar light from the sunshine of his presence within me. (Hebrews 13:9, 2 Corinthians 5:19)

The seeds within me pulsated with life. (Galatians 3:16, Luke 8:11)

I took his hand and he pulled me up to my feet. All the other guests in the room rose as well. Their presence was tangibly felt. They carried a weighty air about them that was holy and priestly. When they saw he meant to escort me away, they returned to their dancing.

Many things crossed my mind as Jesus and I crossed the dance floor into a more private corridor with a balcony view, namely I wondered why none of the saints pursued Jesus?

A banner hung from the room’s entryway. In Aramaic it read:

Strengthen me with raisin cakes, refresh me with apples, for I am weak with love. (Song of Songs 2:5)

The small elegant room featured a three-dimensional mural floor of a blooming vineyard blushing under a hazy sunset. The painting was so lifelike, even the dust kicked up in the air was illuminated like grated gold by the imaginary sunrays. The emerald leaves were silhouetted in basking glory and turned into a yellowish jade. Rows and rows of vines lacing around each other made me catch my breath.

Rosy marbled walls formed an arch in the center of the room before giving way to a chandelier that resembled a flourishing desert rose. Diamond-shaped light bulbs hung from the chandelier and sent shafts of prism light pirouetting across the walls. In the corner of the room was a large bed, hidden behind transparent curtains.

“It is lovely in here,” I breathed, admiring the splendor.

A lamp stand table made of polished gold held woven baskets with embroider cloths set beside them. Inside the baskets were marble bowls heaped with fresh fruit. The fragrance of ripe strawberries, dates, pomegranates, figs, and honey-painted cakes teased my nose. I saw blocks of cheese and nuts beside the fruit.

“Eat some,” Jesus offered, finally releasing my hand, “You haven’t eaten anything all night.”

…

I took a plump strawberry and popped it in my mouth. A refreshing, tart flavor with just the right amount of sugar burst in my mouth. I hummed in delight, imaging that only Eden carried such delectable fruits.

I took up another, and then another before trying a fig and a date. They were equally good but distinguishingly unique. I plopped several blocks of different colored cheese in my mouth until my cheeks swelled like a chipmunk’s. I had difficulty chewing but managed more easily after the first few bites. The rich flavors blended together like cream and salt. Afterward, I went for the nuts in handfuls. When I finished with those I took up a half slice of a pomegranate and plucked some seeds coated in red wine gel. I cupped my hand to my lips and let the seeds fall in before chewing. The tart taste reminded me of the best sherbet punch.

We ate for several more minutes before my appetite was satiated. Afterward, I felt the stickiness of dried fruit juices and honey on my hands. I rubbed my fingers together wondering how I would wash them.

“Is there a bathroom?” I asked.

“I have a jar of water and hyssop out here,” Jesus said, extending his hand toward the balcony.

We walked on the elevated porch, the sky canopied over us. I noticed a hard, blue clay pitcher in the corner. Beside it was a pink potted hyssop bush aflame with brilliant flowers, the color of nectarine skin.

I cupped my hands and Jesus poured some water between them before taking some flowers from the bush. He set them in my hands and I rubbed them together feverishly. He rinsed my hands again and I lightly dried my wet hands with an embroidered cloth beside the baskets. When I finished, I brought my hands to my nose and inhaled deeply the fragrant scent of hyssop plant. I took up the jar and poured water over Jesus’ hands. Afterward, I plucked up a few flowers before putting them in his hands. He repeated what I had done, and I fell silent.

I leaned my torso across the balcony and rested my head in one of my hands. Despite the snow that crested the mountains, I was warm. I looked out and admired the scenery before me. Everything seemed so expansive that I felt a little bit swallowed up in the grandeur of it all. I let my eyes linger over the glowing city, savoring the physical beauty of it like I savored the food I had eaten. Beauty fed my soul like nutritious food nourished my body. Jesus leaned his elbows on the railing of the balcony and also looked upon the terrain before us.

“How come nobody has come in here yet to seek you out?” I asked, finally voicing the question I had tucked away inside when he had whisked me away to the private room.

“What do you mean?” Jesus asked, unassuming.

I shrugged and then my eyebrows fell until they hovered over my eyes.

“Well, I’m just confused as to why we haven’t been crowded yet? I mean, didn’t you deal with that constantly after you began your ministry on earth?”

“I did.”

“So why, if these people know who you are, do they not love you?”

“They do.”

“But they aren’t trying to be near you?” I countered, slightly nonplussed.

“Because they know that I’m near them.”

“Even though you’re in here with me?”

“Yes. They understand that I live within them. That my promise is true. I will never leave them nor forsake them. They don’t need me to appear to them in this way in order for them to be content with me or with themselves. They converse with me all the time.” (ex: John 20:27)

My eyes fell to my cinnamon brown hands. An almost undetectable sense of failure came over me.

“They understand what I don’t fully comprehend,” I said lowly.

Just as quickly as the sense of failure had come, an inner quickening rose within me like a heater being turned on in the dead of winter. It came like a skilled soldier, swiftly combating the negativity that wanted to seize territory. I felt as if a seed had sprouted under the soil of my consciousness. Suddenly an assurance came up, and with it a loving caress that chased away all notions of shame.

I didn’t feel the need to compare myself to the couples on the dancefloor anymore. The precipitous change in my emotions puzzled and pleased me at the same time. I touched my stomach and easily discerned the presence of my Holy Friend (John 14:17).

I heard a soft chuckle from Jesus and refocused my attention on him.

“He’s amazing, isn’t he?” I asked, knowing the answer.

“He’s the Father’s gift to you and to all those sealed for me. You need not fear anything, beloved, not even death. Because of my Father’s Spirit, you will always be with us. He has sealed you forever and he isn’t going anywhere.” (Ephesians 1:!3)

“I think I know that now,” I said. Emotion caught in my throat. My mind traveled to precious instances in my past where the Holy Spirit had comforted and rescued me. There were many nights when I had cried myself to sleep on my bed and felt a warm arm around my heart.

“I love his faithfulness,” I whispered, and again touched my stomach, this time as if I were trying to embrace a friend.

“He will help you comprehend what the others understand. It’s his joy and delight to do so. He has much patience with you. There is peace in his mind toward you. You need never be frustrated with yourself, because it’s the opposite of how he feels about you.” (John 14:26, Hebrews 8:2)

I nodded and the breeze kicked up. The wind carried the fresh fragrance of spikenard, which diffused the air like a perfume bath. The dust of powdery snow lifted and swirled around in the breeze. A few frozen droplets touched my cheeks and I shivered. Some flakes of snow rested and then melted in my hair once the air stilled. I felt as if I had been touched by starlight.

“He would like to take you someplace as well,” Jesus said.

I reflected for a few seconds and then uttered, “Yes. I’m happy to go anywhere he wants me to.”

“Okay.”

Jesus turned toward me. I stood still as he placed his fingers on my temples. Instinctively, I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply, anticipation building in me…

(To read the next snippet, click here)

~I hope you enjoyed this preview of my revised version of Romantic Rendezvous for The Soul (Tasting the Bridegroom Love of Jesus). To purchase a copy of the 1st version, click here. As an author, the sincerest way anyone can thank me is through writing a review of my book(s) on amazon. If you’ve been blessed by my work, I would love to hear from you! Your review reaches out to other women and invites them into this ministry of words…and more importantly, into the tender love of Jesus inside the pages.

“Ashley Thompson’s Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul is simply wonderful. Deliciously descriptive, it nourishes the soul with fresh revelation of God’s love for humanity. This collection of short stories may challenge your thinking about what true intimacy looks like, while making your heart yearn to daily experience the Perfect Love described within its pages. Romantic Rendezvous invites you into a world created by Love Himself, where there’s no mistaking that His love for every individual is not only unconditional and never-failing, but also deeply personal and precious to Him. Get ready to experience the purpose, pleasure, and power of real love!” -Danielle Sanders, Worshiper, Songwriter, Licensed Minister, Former Highschool teacher

~For my book on returning to the liberating and strengthening grace of our heavenly Father, Visions of Celestial Love, click here.

“Ashley McClelland presents us with a true cornucopia of modern psalms, personal testimonies, and short stories. She has set out to reveal and unravel some of the most complex heart issues mankind faces in our quest of understanding what true intimacy with God really looks like. Prepare to have your soul massaged and worked on as you read Visions of Celestial Love.” — Jeremy Minard, Servant King Apparel

Blessings to you as you learn how to journey through this life walking closely with the truest Lover of your heart!

xoxo

Ashley

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Jesus in Disguise (Rosemary)

Right now I’ve been typing up a story called: Mr. Field’s Rosemary (one of my Jesus in disguise books). It takes place in an orchard field with a recently widowed woman on her way to Mr. Joshua Field’s cottage to cook breakfast for him and his six children. What Rosemary discovers is that Mr. Field’s is too going through pain. His beloved wife has run away from home again. This story has two big twists that leads to wholeness for Rosemary and the six adorable children she easily begins to love. I always ask the Lord to help me write and my prayer is that everything I publish leaves a deep, healing impression of Jesus’s love in the heart of every reader. I pray each reader comes to “see” the sweetly inconspicuous ways Jesus is hidden in plain sight in their lives and that they come begin to fellowship with Him daily. Enjoy:

While Joshua was gone Rosemary took some more sips of tea before admiring his kitchen again. She drank in the lovely decor and imagined his wife must have helped him furnish this room. Warmth from the pillar heat lamp rubbed her back like an expert massage therapist.

Rosemary spotted a bright gold chested hummingbird with shimmering emerald wings. It sucked sugared water from a feeder dangling from the paneled patio. The gold-flamed honeysuckle flowers glowed from the peeking rays of the sun. Their vines hung like a soft caress on the patio’s design. The edge of winter was waning and the waking yawns of spring echoed in the scenery.

Joshua announced his presence by softly clearing his throat. He headed for the cabinets, “coffee too?”

“No thank you Mr. Fields. Your tea is quite…perfect.”

Joshua grinned in delight, “I think you’ll enjoy the coffee more.”

Rosemary only stared…missing the taste of freshly brewed coffee on her palate.

“I feel like you’re a coffee drinker.” Mr. Fields stated before turning on the grinder. The inviting scents of the beans wafted underneath Rosemary’s nose.

“I do love coffee,” Rosemary confessed and then shrugged one shoulder, “but usually with a ton of whipped milk and sugar…among other things.” She blushed as she looked down at her belly and slightly patted it, “but I’m trying to lay low on some things right now.”

Mr. Fields gave a sympathetic look.

Tears threatened and Rosemary let out a cough to clear her throat, “I…I overate quite a bit after…” her voice broke. After my husband died, she thought. She shook her head before glancing up at him. His gaze was attentive but not forceful.

A long moment of silence filtered between them, with it, an awkward pressure to break it. Mr. Fields turned off the grinder and carefully made his way toward her.

All of the pain she was feeling was like an angry volcano in her chest. It threatened to squeeze through her throat. Rosemary gulped loudly and her bottom lip twitched. Mr. Fields stopped an arm length away.

She feared he would touch her…but more than that she feared the wrath inside of herself. She had never experienced anger when Richard died…only overwhelming sadness. The worst part was…she felt her anger was directed toward God.

What kind of Christian am I?

Shame flamed Rosemary’s already reddened face. Her jade eyes widened and she took a step back.

“Do you need to talk about it?” Mr. Fields asked gently.

Rosemary shook her head more violently than she intended, “it’s nothing I think would be beneficial to our working relationship.”

“But, would it be beneficial to you? That’s important too.” His voice was so soft it came out like a whisper.

She looked up and saw his beautifully warm eyes. There was genuine care sketched across his bronzy visage.

A thousand thoughts battled in her mind. But the longer she looked at him, the more her mind cleared. It was as if the soft peace she felt around him was being offered to her.
“After…my husband died,” the words came out like the bite of an undying winter. Her shoulders shook and her trembling lips parted before a flood of audible cries came out. Joshua closed the remaining gap between them and wrapped her in his arms. She forgot herself and buried her face against his chest. He rested his chin on her head and embraced her firmly. She stood there in his shelter until she collected herself.

After becoming calm, Rosemary allowed herself to linger in Mr. Field’s supportive arms. She could hear his heartbeat against her ears and the faint scent of spikenard, saffron and calamus were blended like a colon bath on his clothes. Clearing her throat, she put a pushing hand against him and he released her immediately. Clear tears trailed her cheeks, dripped down her chin and splashed against her arms and shirt.

“I…”

He cut her off, “Don’t apologize. I’m glad you got that off your chest.”

She glanced away until he spoke again, “You don’t ever have to pretend you feel anyway other than what you do around me. I’m not unfamiliar with pain…or comfort.”

“Thank you, Mr. Fields.”

He held a hand up, “please call me Joshua. It’s more personable.”

She tilted her head slightly.

“It’s okay if you forget…but it’s another if you do it on purpose. I’m asking you to call me by my first name.”

Deciding not to make waves Rosemary nodded. “Okay,” she verbalized.

“Good,” He said and then only stared. The look on his face spoke volumes more. He desired to say things that she wasn’t ready to hear. Pain flickered in his eyes and then something else. A knowing she couldn’t discern yet it pulled on her soul like a magnet leading straight to his heart.

She sniffled and squinted her eyes in thought.

“I want you to feel like family with myself and the kids.” Joshua said and in her heart, she believed him.

“That is super kind of you to say that. I confess I think my time volunteering with you might unravel some of my emotions. I never meant to involve you in my grieving process, especially since your family is going through a difficult family time as well.”

“I believe this is a good thing,” he said confidently but not arrogantly. Rosemary waited for an explanation and when he offered none she shrugged, “maybe.”

Joshua turned away and went back to fixing his coffee. After pouring fresh water into a silver and black cappuccino machine he offered, “I can help you with breakfast if you like?”

There was something about him that made Rosemary suspect she would not be able to hide behind her self-imposed mask of calm. She trembled inwardly as she feared his peaceful presence would unravel the ugly things within her she had so desperately closed her conscious to. Vulnerability had never been her forte. Her history was marked with painful memories of rejection and scorn whenever she exposed the soft, throbbing, naked places of her soul. She couldn’t imagine Joshua would respond any different.

“No, thank you.” she said, wanting to put distance between herself and him.

Fear not, for you shall not be ashamed; neither be confounded and depressed, for you shall not be put to shame. For you shall forget the shame of your youth, and you shall not [seriously] remember the reproach of your widowhood any more.

For your Maker is your Husband—the Lord of hosts is His name—and the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; the God of the whole earth He is called.

 For the Lord has called you like a woman forsaken, grieved in spirit, and heartsore—even a wife [wooed and won] in youth, when she is [later] refused and scorned, says your God. -Isaiah 54:4-6 AMP

As always, may you enjoy the warmth of Jesus’s love today in  familiar and unexpected places! For a romantic fictional book on the bridegroom love of Jesus, check out my book, Romantic Rendezvous for The Soul!

“As I read, I quickly became enthralled with this book, so beautifully written in the language of love. Each of these short stories so accurately reflects the romantic and wooing heart of the Bridegroom which draws you to Himself into a deeper place of love and intimacy. If you have not yet experienced romantic intimacy with God, I’m confident that this book will set you on course. It’s bound to warm your soul and whet your desire for your own heart-to-heart conversations and experiences with God. The author creatively ministers to the soul, bringing truth to light in the most tangible ways; you will feel that God is speaking directly to you, and He most certainly is!

Some stories caused me to be drawn away into remembrance of my own experiences and conversations with God that have freed my soul; others caused me to reevaluate my heart’s commitment to my first Husband and cry out for forgiveness; and yet others simply took me on a delightful and exciting adventure of what the beginning of a holy, unadulterated love looks like – so refreshing to the soul! I commend the author for using her creative gifting to share personal reflections and heart intimacies which I know could only come from the deep well of Father’s heart. I highly recommend this book as a must read!” -Marina Garcia