The Throne Room

A sneak peek into my upcoming book, The Sacred Wooing (a vivid invitation to experience the bridegroom love of Jesus).

“Then I looked, and, oh!—a door open into Heaven. The trumpet-voice, the first voice in my vision, called out, “Ascend and enter…” -Revelation 4:1 MSG


The highest king sat with blinding light shining from him. Contrasting cumulonimbus clouds and radiant lightning swirled around him like a halo crafted from a tempest, subjugated by an unimaginable powerful force. His appearance was suffused with fiery amber gems. The clouds around him pillowed upward, creating vast, vaporous terrains rippling with the colors of the hemisphere. 

 Majestic flying creatures filled with spiritual power orbited the omnipotent king. Their multiple, feathery wings swayed across their celestial forms like silken curtains. The swooshing of their gargantuan wings caused the air to vibrate with tornadic winds. Their booming voices charged the atmosphere like thunder as they paid homage to the one they revered.  

“Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was, and is, and is to come!”

Royal lords donned in flowing, priestly garments bespeckled with jewels bowed reverently as they circled the throne. Their transcendent voices harmonized into a swelling crescendo. The sound was akin to rushing waves, more resplendent than any music on earth. 

“You are worthy oh Lord to receive glory and honor and power! For you created all things! And by your will they exist, and were created!”

Seven golden lampstands flamed brilliantly, and incense rose like a sheet of fragrant mist from the scintillating floor.

The omnipotent king sat on his immaculate throne and held seven gleaming stars in his hand. They shone like fiberoptic pearls. His robe cascaded down like the clouds covering the amazon forest as a canopy. His clothes shone whiter than fresh snow and a regal, sash hung like sunlight from his shoulder to his waist. The golden floor was transparent glass, mirroring everything above it with an aureate hue.

To the left of the king sat his father. He was the creator of all. They were unified in purpose and in heart. Their resemblance in soul and features were so akin, that having seen one, you would have known the other. From the father’s mouth came the spirit of life—the most precious breath. A single exhale from this spirit could form planets.

The father and kingly son sat, watching for the son’s bride to fully prepare herself. The son had waited patiently for eons and excitedly looked forward to the celebratory day, the day of his gladness of heart. He had prepared himself in the finest apparel. The wine he would offer was the richest created, and he had earnestly desired to drink it with her in the kingdom. A feast in the heavenly  clouds surrounded by a balcony of translucent rainbows and shimmering, fiery jasper stones had been set. The table alone was lengthier than a galaxy. It would be a feast greater than all royal weddings in created history. Serving angels stood ready to attend to the king and his beloved wife. All that awaited her. 

For thousands of years, the son had sent messages to her and yet she was easily distracted and discouraged from her bridal preparations. 

Amid the heavenly jubilee resounding in the divine room, the king distinctly heard her voice in his heart. Like the minute fluting of a swallow compared with the roaring of the deep sea, many voices drowned hers out, but not to him. The spirit of life they shared connected the cry of his beloved to his being. Her true life was hidden in him, for he withheld nothing of himself from her. A crystal bottle that resembled the finest vase appeared before his fiery eyes. It was filled with the salty tears of the object of his affection.

Despite all that he had freely provided for her, she was living like a poor woman. Although the father’s Spirit breath was with her, the breath that created the universe, she lived limited to her natural strength. She was ignorant of the divine glory within her. She did not know what was hers for the taking although he had told her many times. The anguish she suffered pained him, stirring his compassion.

He peered below the heavens and saw her on earth. A spiritual adversary was oppressing her heart. He was a degenerate star, disguised in counterfeit robes to swindle the bride. He twisted the messages the king had delivered to her, causing her chronic agitation, distress, and sadness. Worse still, his cunning lies had bruised the tender places in her soul, and she had unconsciously distanced herself from her king. The more she drank the poisonous lies, the less she trusted the king. As her faith decreased, the less connected she was to the spirit of life who sought to help her. 

“Father,” the son spoke, turning to look directly at him.

The father turned to his beloved son, the seat of his delight. 

They shared such a unity that words weren’t necessary between them. Before the son uttered his name, permission was already given.

The glorious son discarded his royal apparel and humbled himself by donning mortal clothes…


Back Cover:

The Sacred Wooing explores the sacred theology of Jesus as the Church’s Bridegroom using a fictional story painted with tender intimacy. Based loosely on Ephesians 5:15: For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her.

It gently unravels the ageless waters of human desire for everlasting love while also teaching about the church’s place as the beloved bride of Christ.

Through deeply warm conversations, Jesus meets with one of his saints (Noelani). During their outing, he slowly unearths and permissively destroys each fear that has blocked her from entering a life-affirming relationship with him. Beginning at the local coffee shop, she observes as Jesus talks to the barista (Diane) and changes her whole life right there.

Then they visit a nearby lake and watch the stars and water and trees transform into phantasmagoric visions while Noelani is transported to places as beautiful and timeless as Eden, a heavenly ballroom, a glorious beach, a snowy mountaintop, and a royal palace. In the ballroom, they are surrounded by worshipping angelic saints. They talk about the meaning of true worship, dying to self, and putting on the new man in Christ. Jesus talks with her and introduces her to God as “Abba” Father.

Several flashbacks into her childhood and teenage memory add depth and revelation to Noelani’s life-story and her reason for being where she is. Jesus knows that she needs a revelation of God’s grace and love and her identity in Christ. Noelani continually receives Jesus’s truth, and it helps her realize her spiritual unity with him. This divine transaction is often seen physically through shifting clothes as Noelani’s casual attire slowly transforms into a saintly gown, which represents putting on the new man in Christ. (Eph. 4:24).

A battle shortly ensues with an adversary spirit, Akkad-Bela, who has been plaguing Noelani’s life and hindering her spiritual walk with Jesus. After conquering a battle with “the father of lies” (John 8:44) Noelani partakes of communion and falls asleep in the castle comforted by the ways Jesus has ministered truth to her.

Part two begins in Noelani’s kitchen with her friend (Angel) and Jesus as a visiting plumber who enjoys breakfast with them as he asks and answers questions of them both.

As each layer of fear is peeled away, Noelani begins to see herself through God’s eyes, she experiences inner healing and the sanctifying grace of God to walk out a godly lifestyle. Because of Jesus’ expressed love for her, she feels free to open to him about dating, relationships, and the frustrations of her generation when it comes to relationships and religion.

After a transforming discussion, Noelani invites Jesus into her love life out of trust and she is commissioned to help other women discover the blessing of virtuous living through the profound revelation of living like a beloved daughter of the King and bride of Christ.


~For a similar book on divine love, check out my novella, Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul by clicking here.

~For a spoken poem on experiencing the love of Jesus, check out my YouTube Video, I Love You by clicking the link below.

~To watch a free short story about the love of Jesus taken from my book, Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul, click the link below:

Hearing From God (Your Inheritance)

Did you know that you can hear from God?

My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. -John 10:27

It took me a long time to realize that as a child of God, a part of my familial benefits included the ability to hear his voice.

This incredible gift of hearing from our heavenly Father is not just for a select few. It is for everyone, including you. You are a beloved of your Father in Heaven. He wants to speak to you as any good father would want to communicate with his child.

I wrote about this topic in the new anthology book, The Runaway Bride of Christ.

May my testimony encourage and uplift you in your faith!


A Transforming Relationship

“Christianity that isn’t supernatural is superficial.” -Unknown

“I promised you my love and entered the covenant of marriage with you. I, God, the Master, gave my word. You became mine. I gave you a good bath, washing off all that old blood, and anointed you with aromatic oils. I dressed you in a colorful gown and put leather sandals on your feet. I gave you linen blouses and a fashionable wardrobe of expensive clothing. I adorned you with jewelry: I placed bracelets on your wrists, fitted you out with a necklace, emerald rings, sapphire earrings, and a diamond tiara.” -Ezekiel 16:9-12 (MSG)

I began to sense the promptings of the Holy Spirit. I was guided to create a spiritual mind calendar where I put down purposefully things to do every day that would help me abide in Christ. Most of these things included prayer and Bible reading. I began by studying the fruit of the Holy Spirit in Galatians 5, and I limited my television watching. Please keep in mind, I felt led by the Holy Spirit to do these things. No one from the outside instructed me in this, so it wasn’t “legalistic.” 

I prayed to Jesus to wake me up early to spend time with him before I did anything else. The very next morning, I woke up at 5 am, feeling an invisible hand on my arm. I even felt the fingers of this invisible hand. I opened my eyes and discerned the message of the Lord, “It’s prayer and study time.” For the next year, I would wake up almost every morning to be alone with Jesus. I read through the entire Bible. 

The Holy Spirit led me through a process of sanctification. I began to sense what pleased God and what displeased him. I fully gave myself to Him, treasuring Him above all others. 

As I dwelt in his presence, my heart began to heal. I was supernaturally delivered from a demon of anger that was sitting on the hurt in my soul. Now that the hurt was gone, the demon had left. I’m not sure if God kicked it out or if it left on its own. I literally felt an empty space in me where the anger usually was. I gave up my old life and accepted that I was a new creation in Christ. I no longer tended to give in to sinful anger. I began to overlook offenses and become a peacemaker. I no longer gave curt answers that cut my family. I now offered gentle words that turned away wrath (see Proverbs 15:1, NIV). The insecurities that once crippled much of my life began peeling away. As I received the love of God, I began to love myself and take care of my body. Within a year, I was at a balanced weight.

Not only did I love myself, but I liked myself. As a result, I gave that gracious love to others. My mind was slowly becoming a beautiful garden. I no longer had dark thoughts. Divinely inspired images began filling my mind, and I started having “visions” of the kingdom of heaven. I journaled some of these down in my book, Visions of Celestial Love

“If you [really] love Me, you will keep and obey My commandments.

And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper (Comforter, Advocate, Intercessor—Counselor, Strengthener, Standby), to be with you forever— the Spirit of Truth, whom the world cannot receive [and take to its heart] because it does not see Him or know Him, but you know Him because He (the Holy Spirit) remains with you continually and will be in you. -John 14:15-16 (AMP)

The Lord began stressing the importance of my obedience. The first relationship God repaired was with my father. God taught me that no matter how I didn’t want to do what my father asked, I was commanded in the Bible to honor him. It was hard at first, but as I died to pride, I began walking in joyful obedience. My father and I developed a closer relationship. He began buying me presents at random and taking me on father- daughter dates. I went from a begrudgingly obedient child to a willfully obedient child. The Lord would inspire me to cook dinner for my family, clean the garage (although I hated doing so, especially since there were spiders), and serve them with my whole heart. 

One night my eldest sister told me to not sleep on the couch. I liked sleeping on the couch because I could see the stars through the large windows. As I was drifting off to sleep on the couch again, the Lord reminded me of Ashanti’s words. I frowned but spread a blanket on the floor and slept. In the morning Ashanti asked me why I was snoozing on the floor. I responded, “Because you told me not to sleep on the couch.” She gave me a pleased smile and then said, “You can sleep on the couch (from now on).” God was showing me what it was like to grow in, “wisdom and in stature, and in favor with God and man” like Jesus who willingly obeyed his parents as a teenager (see Luke 2:51-52, NIV, emphasis added).  



Miracles began happening in my life. I think it’s important to note that I didn’t chase miracles. I pursued knowing God. Miracles are a result of the presence of God. One morning after spending time with God, I proceeded to politely excuse myself., “Father, I’m hungry and I think I will watch TV.” After making breakfast I tried to watch TV on two different televisions, and nothing was working. I checked the plugs and connections, and everything was set up right. There was no reason for the televisions to be showing static. I went to the family computer and tried to watch shows on YouTube, but the internet wasn’t “working.” Then I got a small impression from the Holy Spirit to visit a ministry website by one of the ministers I enjoyed listening to. It worked immediately! It was like God was saying, “I’m enjoying your company. I want to spend more time with you.”

One day, I was taking a shower and as it was ending, I realized I had left my drying towel on the sink counter which was past the commode. I didn’t want to drip water on the floor, so I thought to lean on the towel railing and reach for my towel. I felt the Holy Spirit tell me, “Don’t do that. The railing is unstable.” I disregarded his impression, unsure if I had heard from Him and leaned on it anyway. It gave way and I began falling fast. I could have seriously gotten hurt, but I felt an invisible presence catch me and slowly lower my body down to the floor! I still don’t know it if was an angel or the Lord who caught me. I recall thanking the Lord multiple times for keeping me safe.  

One night I heard the voice of God. It was so clear, my ears picked it up, but his voice wasn’t projecting from the outside. His voice came from inside my heart! He told me, “Ashley, your rabbit is going to get sick and die.” For years I had prayed for the health of my family (spiritual, mental, emotional and physical). I would include prayers for my rabbit, Floppy’s, health as well. I patted my chest where I heard his voice and stood frozen in wonder. I had never heard God so clearly! At this point in my walk, Christ was dwelling in my heart by faith (see Ephesians 3:17, AMP). The Holy Spirit had done a beautiful job of making my heart a nice home for Jesus. At that time, Floppy was showing no signs of illness, but I began spending more time with her as I believed Jesus had spoken to me. I took her to the park a lot; I videotaped her and gave her extra kisses. 

Sometime later, she began to show symptoms of sickness. She stopped eating and would make small painful noises. We took her to the vet only to find out that cancer had spread throughout her body and there was nothing the vet could do. My mom decided it would be merciful for us to allow the vet to put her out of her misery. I was the last one to hold Floppy and I remember her licking me on my nose as I reluctantly gave her to one of the assistants. I cried loudly as I left the veterinarian. As dejected and sad as I felt, I realized Jesus had warned me ahead of time so I wouldn’t be shocked by her passing. He also did this so I could spend more purposeful time with her and have cherished times together. He cared enough about me to warn me so I wouldn’t be devastated…


~I hope you enjoyed this brief snippet of my testimony. If you’d like to purchase a physical copy of the book, The Runaway Bride of Christ, click here (please allow 2-3 weeks before delivery). You may also purchase a kindle version on amazon by clicking here.

~For a novella full of the voice of God, check out my book, Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul, by clicking here.

The Shepherd’s Arms

He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young. -Isaiah 40:11


The Shepherd’s Arms

Where do you go for shelter? There is nothing like the embrace of Jesus. In his arms, we find healing peace, wholesome serenity, unconditional love, powerful joy, and unmatched security.

When I was a little girl, I went to my mother for comfort, and I went to my dad for protection. I found that I needed their arms for different reasons. Today, I go to my husband’s arms when I want to experience unconditional love.

No matter where I go, no one has ever held me like Jesus. He often flows through the people in my life to touch me, but there have been times, where I’ve experienced a personal embrace from him, and it is like nothing on earth!

You can run to Jesus’ arms for everything. If you need comfort, run to him. If you need peace, run to him. If you need joy, run to him. If you just want to be held, run to him. He is your Good Shepherd. He laid down his life for you, his sheep. He longs to hold you close to his heart.

Prayer

“Father, I thank you for your tender embrace through your son Jesus. Thank You for loving me in a way that is personal and that comes with all the meticulous care of a shepherd watching over his sheep. Lord, I lean into You for an embrace. I pray that You will show me how much You love me. Help me to trust You fully with every detail of my life. I invite your presence and Lordship in every aspect of my life. Fill my life with your tangible arms. Maneuver things around in my world until the fullness of your Shepherding care is complete. May your embrace in my life be tangible not only to me, but to others who witness how my life is going. May your glory, love, pleasure, and will be accomplished. I trust myself completely to your shepherding care. I open my heart, mind, and soul completely to you. Lead me, direct me, speak to me, and hold me. In Jesus name, amen.”

Three Great Loves

I don’t think we yet know what it’s like to be loved by a king entirely apart from our efforts and works.

And not just a king but the King of Kings.

And not just a high and lofty king, but the King who sits enthroned in the heavens, being worshiped by angels so magnificent and glorious they could kill us from their presence.

We are entirely loved, and this love is fierce toward fear, because fear cannot exist when it is entirely accepted.

I don’t think we yet know how much the Trinity cares deeply for us.

He has provided us with every essential relationship for emotional happiness and stability.

Think about it.

We have a perfect Father who owns everything!

His love rears us in loving tenderness and in merciful wisdom.

We have a perfect spouse.

Jesus is the ultimate Husband.

He laid down His life for us when we rejected Him.

Like the kindest Husband, He patiently woos us to Himself, romances us with His Presence, Word, creation, and an inexhaustible list of other things.

He forgives us always and desires us more than anything else.

We have the perfect Friend.

The Holy Spirit sticks more closely than a brother.

He loves us more deeply than father or mother, and like a good friend He has only our best interest at heart.

He brings us peace when we are afraid. He heals us when we are sick. He teaches us humbly if we are willing to learn. He guides us in all things. He empowers us when we are weak.

He is our ever-faithful companion.

The Trinity had provided for our every need. He provides the three great loves every heart craves and was made for.

May He, constantly cause you to realize more just how deeply you are loved.

Soul Satisfaction

For He satisfies the longing soul and fills the hungry soul with good. -Psalm 107:9

Soul Satisfaction

How many people do you know who are satisfied inside? Are you satisfied? Our society is teeming with advertisements that promise to fulfill the desires of our hearts. The problem is, God has set eternity in our hearts and nothing earthly can truly ever fulfill us in such a way that we will feel complete without God (Ecclesiastes 3:11).

Solomon was the richest and wisest man on earth during his time. He was so wealthy that silver was as common as stones in his kingdom (1 Kings 10:27). He was surrounded by such glamor and spoke so intelligently that a visiting queen was struck by his wealth and captivated by his words. To impress a common person is good enough, but to render a queen awestruck is another matter entirely. Yet despite acquiring all his soul- could desire Solomon cried out in Ecclesiastes “everything is meaningless!”

Aristotle once wrote, “it is the nature of desire not to be satisfied and most men live only for the gratification of it.” While this is true without God, we have the promise of scripture that those who come to Jesus and drink of the water he gives will “thirst no more.”  This is the same promise king David sang about in Psalm 23, “the Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.”

David had a close, abiding relationship with God, and through that relationship, he discovered that his soul was satisfied to the point where all his wants were fulfilled. It’s not material wealth and acquisition that fulfills us, although God promises to provide us with what we need, and he is able to do exceedingly and abundantly above what we can ask for. It is only a relationship with God that satisfies.

Prayer

“Father, I pray that you will help me to draw near to you in a fulfilling way. I pray that you will reveal yourself to me daily as my good shepherd. Open my heart, mind, and soul to your goodness and presence in a way that satisfies me. I pray that you will be the treasure of my heart and the desire of my eyes. I pray for a love relationship with you that is divinely beautiful, wholesome, holy, and powerful. Help me to place my soulish desires in your hands from a place of trust and peace. I thank you for never withholding good from me. You are the most giving father (James 1:17). Create a paradise in me. Make my soul a well-watered garden (Isaiah 58:11). May I walk with you in the cool of the day as Adam and Eve did in Eden before the fall. I love you Lord and I praise you forever. In Jesus name, amen.”

Beautiful Character

The Lord is [rigidly] righteous in all His ways and gracious and merciful in all His works. -Psalm 145: 17

Beautiful Character

David understood the character of God and his intimate knowledge of God helped him to trust the Lord in the worst of circumstances. This personal knowledge of the One who is trustworthy also helped David accomplish great feats, walk in integrity, make wise decisions, and establish a kingdom full of righteousness, peace, prosperity, and worship. David operated as a brave king and he was frequently filled by the Holy Spirit to even slip into priestly roles in leading worship, prophesying, and drawing hearts to the Lord.

I still remember the day I first began to understand Psalm 145:17. The term “the Lord” represents a ruler. Jesus is the King of kings and the Lord of lords. His position requires respect, honor, and willing servitude. David goes on to say that our great Lord is “rigidly righteous in all His ways.” This means that the Lord is always right. Everything thing he does is purely good, like crystal. All his judgements are perfect. Nothing he decides is wrong. Whether we know it or not, we crave a leader like this. Because his ways are true and just, we can trust him to always do what is right. He is holy.

Later, David says that our Lord is “gracious and merciful in all his works.” We are the work of his hands according to Isaiah 64:8. While God is perfect and holy, he extends grace and mercy in all that he does. This means that his holiness (rigid righteousness) has a core of love. He pours out grace. He is merciful in his dealings with you.

It is a great and beautiful mystery to have a God who is rigid in righteousness and yet gracious and merciful toward the work of his hands. God is the perfect Father. He is full of love and compassion toward you as his child, and all his decisions regarding your life can be trusted because all his decisions are right. You can trust him to lead and guide your life. He wants only good things for you! Another analogy that might be helpful is to imagine the holiness of God as the sun. While the sun is so bright we cannot touch it or look upon it without special glasses that shield our eyes, the light and warmth that pours from the sun gives light and life to everything on earth. This is an example of how beautiful God’s holiness and love are combined.

Prayer

Father God, I pray that you would open the eyes of my heart to see your righteousness as truly beautiful. I pray that you will help me trust that you only emit true goodness, mercy, grace, and righteousness in all your works. Help me to understand that I am the work of your hands and that you are my good Father. Lord, help me to know you deeply in a way that transforms my life and our relationship. May others bask in the light and warmth of your righteousness and grace that fill my life. In Jesus name, amen.


If you enjoyed this short devotional, you would likely find refreshment in my devotional book, Visions of Celestial Love (An Invitation into Healing Intimacy).

“Come, all you are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost. Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy? Listen, listen to me and eat wha tis good, and you will delight in the richest of fare.” – Isaiah 55:1-2 NIV

Are you ready to taste of the sweet delicacies of God in a deeply reviving and personal way? For those who want to drink, for those who want to eat and be refreshed and renewed, Visions of Celestial Love is a feast between you and the King of Heaven, who loves you more than anyone else. He invites you to dine on wholesome, good, savory food and delicious, zesty, fruitful drink. He awaits you with a sparkle in His eye. He is ready for your company. He delights to have you as a guest.

“Eat, friends, and drink; drink your fill of love.” – Song of Songs 5:1 NIV

“Ashley presents us with a true cornucopia of modern psalms, personal testimonies, and short stories. She has set out to reveal and unravel some of the most complex heart issues mankind faces in our quest of understanding what true intimacy with God really looks like. Prepare to have your soul massaged and worked on as you read Visions of Celestial Love.” — Jeremy Minard, Servant King Apparel

The Counsel of God

Seeing the hand of God in our lives is one of the greatest joys we can experience as his beloved children.

I’m delighted to share a recent post with you about a series of events where God was clearly in the details. His counsel and wisdom are timeless and watching his plans unfold is like an endless Christmas morning.

I pray you are blessed and encouraged, and I would love to hear about your God-adventures in the comments below!


God is absolutely AMAZING!!!!!! 🥳😍

I’m over elated to work with an anti-trafficking organization established to assist sex trafficking survivors find healing in a Christ-centered, restoration home and to educate the Monterey Bay community about human trafficking! 🕊✨

Years ago, I opened my heart to being used by God to help those who have been through the horrors of trafficking. I still remember praying to him and saying that I was willing to help the suffering if he helped me and protected my daughters. ❤️

In November, I felt like God encouraged me to sign up to sell my books at a community Harvest Festival for MBCC. I obeyed, and my booth was right next to the Board President for this amazing ministry. She asked me what I was selling, and I shared with her about my books and how God healed my heart from deep rejection. I shared with her how I had saw a vision of Heaven in the best-selling book, His Beauty for My Ashes. 🌈

She listened in a way that was so unassuming, peaceful and attentive. I asked her about her booth, and she shared about the antitrafficking ministry. My heart immediately quickened with compassion, and I noticed that the Executive Director shared a part of my name…and she had written a book. The titles between our books were notable. 📚

Later, I perused the website and saw that their partner was “Eden’s Glory.” The name Eden holds such profound spiritual and personal meaning to me (it’s also my firstborn’s name). I filled out their online application for volunteers/staff and waited weeks. No response…⏰⏳

But God was working behind the scenes. ☺️

Near the end of December, I received an email from the Executive Director saying she was so sorry for missing my application (it never happens) and that she would love to have me come in for the trauma awareness training. Now, at this time, I was just finishing up my New Testament Leadership certification which included several counseling classes and i had specifically prayed to God to be able to put my knowledge of healing into practical use (no coincidence). I responded that I would be delighted to come in after my Christmas vacation. 🎁🌲

Little did I know that an event happened which connected me with the Director of Housing. I had no idea she worked there, but she had been moved by the wonderful things God was doing in my life and had been on my website. She told me in December before I went on vacation that she was praying for me. When the Executive Director saw my application and presented it to the Director of Housing who had already been talking to her about me. 🤩

Before I stepped into the job interview, they had decided to hire me!!! 🥳

So many other details aren’t mentioned here, and I am in awe at just how beautifully God is in the details! He is such a personal Father. Living life being led by him is such an adventure! 👑🥰👑🤍!

I am soooooo honored to be a part of the healing journey in the lives of survivors. I am SOOOO excited for the ways I know God will bring comfort, peace and freedom in their lives and I am beyond blessed to be used by him to serve these precious women! 😇💖


For You formed my inward parts;
You covered me in my mother’s womb.
14 I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Marvelous are Your works,
And that my soul knows very well.
15 My frame was not hidden from You,
When I was made in secret,
And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed.
And in Your book they all were written,
The days fashioned for me,
When as yet there were none of them.

-Psalm 139:13-16

Holy Fire, Holy Surrender

For Christ’s love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. And He died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves, but for Him who died for them and was raised again.… -2 Corinthians 5:14-15

The Bible describes the eyes of Jesus like flames of fire (Revelation 19:12).

In the Old Testament, the most Holy Place was reached only after walking past the flames of sacrifice on the brazen altar. (Exodus 27)

Something had to die so something could live.

A lamb for a man.

Jesus came as the sacrificial Lamb and as the last Adam. (John 1:29, 1 Corinthians 15:45)

In my life God has presented me with the fire of his love and the purifying water of his Word.

He consumes my life with eternity.

Unconditional love is a resurrection.

Because when unconditional love is fully received it brings death to self.

God’s love is not without sacrifice.

If Jesus died, then all die. (2 Corinthians 5:14)

There is a mystery of the gospel spelled out in Romans.

It is a beautiful union with Christ.

Paul describes this as a mental, emotional, bodily and spiritual surrender through affiliation with Christ. (Romans 6)

Hallelujah!

Oh, how sweet!

How victorious!

How gloriously freeing is this death described in scripture!

I die with Him, so I live with Him!

Death to self is nothing to be feared…rather, it’s an invitation to an intimate relationship that is bound together by the greatest power!

We become inseparable!

I become just like Him! (Romans 8:29)

“If you love Me, you will obey Me.” (John 14:15)

A life laid down is only possible by the power of the Holy Spirit.

It can only be birthed by a love that’s worth it!

To walk on water is no greater miracle than to defy the selfish nature, we were all born with.

To habitually deny self is no less miraculous than to be above sickness, disease, the devil and demons.

Oh, to be above…

To be seated with Him in heavenly places above all principality and power. (Ephesians 1: 21-23)

He was so humble as a Man that He followed God in obedience even to death on the cross.

There is no resurrection without the cross.

Then Jesus told His disciples, “If anyone wants to come after Me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow Me. -Matthew 16:24

It’s not an invitation to despair, but to a hope that goes behind the torn veil.

Nothing says I love you, like giving up your whole life.

Marriage is such a small shadow compared to this commitment.

This covenant.

This incredible union.

I live to praise You forever!

To worship You!

To glorify You!

I adore You, Jesus.

It’s easy to surrender.

You make it easy with your love!

A man hasn’t lived until he’s found something he’s willing to die for.

I choose to die to my own human power.

For your supernatural power.

Your divine power that heals the lepers, casts out devils, raises the dead and cures the sick.

I no longer see us as two, but one.

Jesus, you said, “The Father and I are one.” (John 10:30)

Jesus, you prayed that we would be one. (John 17:21)

Paul said, “I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live but Christ Who lives in me.” (Galatians 2:20)

I am what I am by the grace of God. (1 Corinthians 15:10)

This is powerful grace.

This is the triumphant love that split hell open and bankrupted it of victory. This is the violent love that caused the grave to tremble and break.

This is the love that smashed the serpents’ skull (the oppressor of mankind).

This is the love that gave everything for YOU.

He spared no expense to save you.

His love compelled him to die even for his enemies to make them his sons.

To give them an everlasting inheritance.

This love that pounds and beats like a lover over his beloved.

This is the love that lives and breathes in my heart.

I hear Him call me daily to oneness.

I hear his sweet song that beckons me to lay down my plans for the glorious life He has prepared for me.

Surrender is harder than sacrifice.

That’s why it’s greater than sacrifice.

“Sacrifice and offerings, You have not desired but a body You have prepared for Me! I say here I Am, it is written about Me in the volume of the Book. I desire to do your will, my God; your law is written within my heart.” (Psalm 40:6-8)

May we know as Paul knew, as the early church knew and as Jesus knew, the glory of living a life fully and completely surrendered to God! May we allow the flame of love that burn in Jesus’s eyes to consume us so that we may truly live heavenly lives!

Inspirational Scriptures:

“For whoever wishes to save his life [in this world] will [eventually] lose it [through death], but whoever loses his life [in this world] for My sake will find it [that is, life with Me for all eternity].” -Matthew 16:25 AMP

Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit. Whoever loves his life will lose it, but whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.… -John 12:24-25


For similar allegoric devotionals, check out my book, Visions of Celestial Love.

“When I read Visions of Celestial Love, it is as if I am brought down to my knees to worship. What the Holy Spirit has done in and through Ashley, He is doing also in me. What a wonderful experience. It is very rich. Thank you for sharing the treasure.”—Riko Suci Alam, CEO of Ligar Jaya and owner of Clove Garden hotel in Bandung Indonesia. 

Magazine Feature!

God has been doing so many amazing things!

I feel so incredibly blessed and honored to have been a part of this amazing book project spearheaded by Dr. Sherley.

My chapter, Created in Heaven Born on Earth, is the 1st chapter in the book. It is about the dignity and worth God places on every human being and how we have inherited value because we were created by God Himself, even if we weren’t planned by our parents. I pray this book brings great healing and ministers to the hearts and souls of every reader.

Recently, I was featured in an article on Making Headline News about my book, Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul. To read the article, click here!

Also, recently, I was added to an international catalog for my life coaching services. I am a certified life breakthrough coach and before 2024, I will be certified in New Testament Leadership. I offer coaching services with prayer counseling to my clients. If you have a God-sized-dream, feel stuck in life, would like a comforting source of cheering you on, a listening ear and a Jesus-loving encourager, I would love to partner with you- as your coach. Email me for more information: nourishmentthroughwords@gmail.com



At the beginning of 2023, with the encouragement of my pastors, I wrote down a list of things I was believing for the year 2023. I prayed about this list as I thoughtfully wrote each one down on a special card. So far, 5 out of 7 have come true.

I believe God loves to make His children’s dreams come true. He places desires and dreams in our hearts, and He does it so we can follow Him, full of trust, into a satisfying life where we feel fulfilled and pour out His goodness to the world around us. I want to encourage you to never let go of the dreams in your heart! The world needs you to fulfill the calling on your life. And nothing will ever make you happier than living a life of closeness with God while seeing your prayers answered and the power of Jesus in your world.

And then God answered: “Write this.
    Write what you see.
Write it out in big block letters
    so that it can be read on the run.
This vision-message is a witness
    pointing to what’s coming.
It aches for the coming—it can hardly wait!
    And it doesn’t lie.
If it seems slow in coming, wait.
    It’s on its way. It will come right on time
.

-Habakkuk 2:3 MSG

Jesus Weeps with You Healing Through Loss

.-This snippet is from the revised version of my book, Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul. In this chapter, I lovingly engage the narrative behind the “sovereignty of God” teaching that once crippled my faith by incriminating the goodness of God when it came to healing. I hope this snippet helps build your faith, comforts the hurting places in your heart and helps you trust in your heavenly Father’s heart toward you. Jesus came to heal, and it is God’s will that we have abundant life.


Chapter 8: The Accuser

..Jesus smiled with pleasure at my decision to trust his word. He explained, “My love, the adversary has no grounds to accuse you before our Father, because my blood has purified the heavenly holy of holies. I forever sit as your High Priest in heaven. Your right standing with our Father is as secure as mine as long as you never reject me.

“Wow,” I breathed, feeling as if I were inhaling air fragrant with grace.

“As well, Father is not displeased with you. He is not angry with you in the slightest. He has promised never to be incensed against you. He has promised never to rebuke you.[i] This is the Gospel of Peace Isaiah prophesied about. Our Father delights in you and he rejoices over you. You are his well-beloved child.”

I smiled without knowing, “amen” I whispered, feeling at a loss of anything more to say. All I wanted to do was continue to listen to Jesus and be healed by his words.

“Even though the Accuser cannot slander you before our Father, he can still whisper lies to you about Him. He has falsely accused the Father to you for months now. He’s used almost every hardship that you’ve experienced as an opportunity to blaspheme God in your ears. The incorrect way that you see the Father now has not just been a result of your own conclusions.”

***

Without warning, my emotions were thrust back to eight months prior when one of my dearest childhood friends, Cassie, passed away forty-eight hours after a terrible car accident. I had rushed to the ECU to see her, praying hard the whole way in the car. I remember struggling to see through my tears as I drove and cried out for God to heal her.

I was let into the hospital room with her family and together we prayed, hugged, sobbed, and anxiously waited, hoping she would wake up. When the heart monitor flat lined, I felt like my own heart had stopped. We all watched with held breath as more doctors rushed in after a small emergency alarm rang. They tried and failed to revive her. When the head doctor finally dropped the defibrillator and turned toward us with sad eyes, I broke down. A flood of wails erupted in the room as Cassie’s family cried loudly.

In that moment of hopelessness and heartbreak, I remembered hearing an evil being whispering in my mind. It told me that God wanted my friend to die and that’s why my prayers hadn’t been answered. It told me, God needed another, “flower in his garden in heaven,” so he took her. It told me that perhaps if I was a better Christian, God would have reconsidered and healed Cassie. A chilly sensation had run through my heart that day. The words of the enemy successfully broke a tender place in my soul and formed a bleeding rift in the area of my trust in God’s goodness.

***

The memory opened up my hidden wound afresh and I bowed my head as heavy sorrow weighed on me.

Jesus read my thoughts and asked, “do you think it was God’s will that Cassie died by a drunk driver?”

I shut my eyes tightly as the fresh inner wound of Cassie’s tragic death opened. Fast tears formed before slipping down my cheeks, “I don’t know,” I said brokenly even though I knew I believed it had been God’s will.

“It wasn’t,” Jesus said, his eyes flooding with pained compassion.

“But how can that be? I thought God’s will was always done?” I said with a small frown of confusion.

“Sadly, not always. The Word of God says, God wills that none should perish but that all should come to repentance.[ii] Tragically, people perish every day even though God paid the ultimate price for everyone to be saved. When my disciples asked me to teach them how to pray, I told them to pray for God’s kingdom to come and for his will to be done on earth as it is in heaven.[iii] The fact that I told them to pray for God’s will to be done on earth implies that his will is not always done.”

Jesus continued, “My dear if our Father’s will was always done, earth would look just like Eden, and everyone would have a life-giving relationship with God. My earthly ministry alleviated human suffering by destroying the works of the devil through preaching the truth of the Gospel to the poor, through healing the sick, binding up the broken hearted, casting out devils, raising the dead, and ministering to the needs of people.[iv] God’s will came to earth from heaven in every miracle his Holy Spirit performed through me. For the Spirit of the Lord was upon me to do all those things.[v] With every blind eye opened, with every hungry belly filled, with every crippled man leaping for joy, with every truth spoken, and every disease healed, people saw God and often praised him afterward. I only did what I saw my Father doing.[vi]

“This is beautiful news,” I said as a cleansing flow of cool tears spilled from my eyes and slipped down my cheeks. Jesus smiled tenderly at me and softly held my chin with his thumb and pointer finger. For a moment, he watched my tears fall as if they were precious gemstones. I remembered the scripture that said God collected the tears of his children in a bottle and that he recorded each one in his book.[vii]

After a few seconds of only our eyes speaking, he gently released his hand from my chin and continued sharing the good news. “My ministry on earth is the clearest picture mankind has of the heart of God. His heart is good. He does not delight in human suffering. I always obeyed his command to love and to declare truth. If you’ve seen me, you’ve seen the Father.[viii] I and my Father are one.[ix] And no one who denies me truly knows God for I was with God in the beginning.[x] I am Truth, I am the Word made flesh.[xi] My dear, God is love.[xii] He so loved the world that he sent me.[xiii] All true goodness originates with him.”

His healing words broke through a dam of religious lies and self-protection in my heart releasing a fresh pool of tears. My eyes welled before the assembling tears began dripping down my chin and wetting my sleeves.

Moved by great love, Jesus gently wiped them away even as his eyes misted with deep consoling compassion. He inched his face closer to mine until all I could see was his radiant face. His visage was pouring with beautiful love. “Noelani, God wanted to heal Cassie and comfort you and her family, like I did at Lazarus’s tomb when I came as the resurrection and raised him from the dead.[xiv] God wept with you as I wept with Mary and Martha. He felt your pain, as well as his own.”

I shut my eyes to flush them of the tears that began blinding my vision. When I began to turn to look away, Jesus softly cupped my face still and I allowed my face to rest in his hands. As I did, I felt peace behind the surface of his fingertips. Jesus tenderly stroked my eyelids with his thumbs and to my surprise, I didn’t flinch away. Normally, I had a natural reaction to protect my eyes from anything that would touch them because of how sensitive and crucial they were to body and well-being. But when Jesus touched my eyelids, I felt no need to self-protect. This soothing motion of his thumbs melted me. It was like he was blessing me with clearer spiritual vision. He spoke again and I felt his balmy breath on my nose. His words washed over me like a warm mineral pool.

“Healing is my Father’s will for his kids, it is part of the atonement. Healing is the children’s bread.”[xv]

I felt a stony weight lift from my chest and my breathing became more relaxed as the truth came in. A place in my mind felt disencumbered.

Jesus released his hands from my face, and I looked upon him like someone who woke up to see sunshine for the first time after hibernating through the winter.

For the first time in a year, I felt a sense of peace come into the pained place that ached for Cassie’s presence. I smiled without effort at Jesus.


-To delve more deeply, check out the unrevised version of Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul, by clicking here.

“Ashley depicts such a level of intimacy with Jesus so poignantly that I believe it will arouse others’ hearts with passion to pursue a new depth and commitment in their relationship with Him. I pray with all my heart that through her insights seamlessly woven into the stories, the church (men and women) would recognize their one true identity as brides and not servants. The author helps us learn to allow ourselves be loved and healed and no longer driven to meet unrealistic expectations of ourselves and others. I believe that Ashley’s book will facilitate cultivating a fulfilling relationship with Jesus and abandoning religion once and for all! Ashley gives hope to those of us who feel or have felt they have sunk too low in their depravity. She demonstrates and enables us to believe that, no matter how vile our pasts, we can be washed white as snow by the blood of the Lamb and made beautiful new creations. She conveys with a refreshing rawness that nothing is beyond His power and (most reassuringly) His desire to redeem and restore. She illustrates the amazing grace of God with its power to enable us to live holy lives by His spirit and not the letter of the law and religion.
Possibly the most pertinent lesson that Ashley wisely shares in some of her stories is the most painful yet wonderful journey we go through if we choose to face the surrender of our lives and desires to God. Through her writing she gently urges us to come to this place of trust with the Father who loves us beyond our comprehension. The stories are heartwarmingly honest. Ashley has a beautiful gift of using descriptive language which instantly creates pictures in your minds as she relates her stories and makes them so real and alive.
May it lead you into your own passionate journey deeper into the heart of Jesus and to experience wonderful encounters with Him, our eternally faithful and true love.”
 ~Celina Haywood, Licensed Minister, Former Missionary to Thailand, Beautiful Encourager 💗

Scripture references from this snippet:

[i] Isaiah 54:9

[ii] 2 Peter 3:9

[iii] Matthew 6:10

[iv] Acts 10:38

[v] Luke 4:18

[vi] John 5:19

[vii] Psalm 56:8

[viii] John 14:9

[ix] John 10:30

[x] 1 John 2:23, John 1:2

[xi] John 1:14, John 14:6

[xii] 1 John 4:8

[xiii] John 3:16

[xiv] John 11:25

[xv] Matthew 15:22-28, John 6:32-35


-For an amazing Biblical teaching on the Sovereignty of God by Andrew Wommack, click here.