“I tell you the truth, anyone who believes in me will do the same works I have done, and even greater works, because I am going to be with the Father.” -Jesus in John 14:12
The Holy Spirit moves so mightily in prayer
“You’ll never believe what happened!” I turned and saw the woman I had prayed for three days ago standing beside my chair with an excited look in her eyes. It was break time at Charis Bible college and I had just set out on the new adventure of trusting God with everything…finances, school, this journey, transportation, boarding, etc.
She had told me earlier that week that she lost all appetite for food. “Why?” I asked as she forced herself to eat. “I had stomach surgery years ago…and something went wrong. Since then, I only eat because I remember to. My body never feels hungry.”
I watched her chew and asked her, “do you want God to heal you of that?”
“Well…I’ve had it so long.”
I marvel at the level of faith I showed those 4ish years ago…it was almost as if I didn’t hear her words. They rolled over me like water off a ducks back. I simply inquired again, “do you want God to heal you of that?” I was confident the Lord would touch her.
When she saw I didn’t flinch she nodded, “yes.”
I took her hand and prayed a simple prayer, “thank you God for touching her body and making her whole. In Jesus name amen.”
Now three days later, she found me in a crowd with the good news.
“Ashley! For the first time in years I feel hungry again!”
I smiled at the news of healing and said calmly, “praise God.” She seemed confused at my lack of visible enthusiasm. I continued my studies. Healing miracles were a natural part of my life back then.
As I look back on my journey of understanding grace, faith-righteousness, the Holy Spirit, and the Gospel, I realize I’ve been going through loops…between victory and defeat, faith and fear, resting and striving, etc. Recently my husband and I have been re-evaluating our beliefs. We both went to Colorado seeing more supernatural miracles than when we left.
My husband has shared stories like praying over a cloth and seeing a man healed of cancer, seeing a man’s back healed, and seeing demons cast out. We both believe in the power of the Gospel to heal, deliver and save. Recently we’ve seen more acts of God in witnessing, seeing someone baptized in the Holy Spirit, and seeing healing manifest. (I just want to say that knowing God is with us in our mess and wants to set people free from whatever cripples them, makes living in hope and joy a beautiful, comforting reality). We both came to California for the purpose of doing the Lord’s work by making disciples.
Years later, I found myself praying for a friend and she felt a weight lift off of her mind and experienced a level of freedom. Weeks after that I was praying for my daycare children and a little girl heard God’s voice speaking to her (she has since changed dramatically). Before that I prayed for a lady who had pain in her hand and a lump. Before I was done praying the lump shrank and went away along with the pain.
I’m learning again to lean into Him when I pray and rest in His love and abide in His truth. Trusting only in His power
He truly wants to heal the sick, comfort broken hearts, set captives free and minister grace. God truly gets all the glory. It’s by His grace.
Thank you Jesus for paying it all so that mankind could receive the favor and blessings of God on earth as it is in heaven.
~I pray you receive from Gods loving heart the power of his miracle working grace in your circumstances. He doesn’t give to us because we work for it, He gives to us because He loves us and Jesus paid for us to have nothing short of God’s kingdom on earth. There is nothing that you may be suffering with right now that God hasn’t paid for it to be taken care of. He loves you soo much. You are his beloved child. God has richly blessed you in Christ!
For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. -Ephesians 2:10 NLT
I’ve been thinking about sharing this testimony for several weeks. I was recently hired as the Bible teacher for Monterey Bay Christian School. I will be teaching on the topic “Who is God” for the whole 2022-2023 school year! I cannot think of a greater topic to teach! The holy weight of this time has been like a cluster of sacred balsam in my chest, scenting my soul with exhales of heavenly joy.
I hope sharing my testimony creates a place of confident hope and expectation in your own soul concerning the words God has spoken over your life! He is faithful to his word, He is faithful to you! (2 Timothy 2:13, Psalm 36:5)
What’s been amazing about this whole journey was all the ways God showed me things beforehand:
“When the Spirit of truth comes…he will declare to you the things that are to come.” -John 16:13
1. Almost 5 years ago, when I was pregnant with Eden, my husband was busy creating a map out of our future in ministry. Anyone who knows my husband, knows that he frequently hears from God. As he was penning the children’s ministry portion the Lord spoke to him and he sat with me at our friend’s table and said, “The Lord says, he wants you in charge of our future children’s ministry. He told me he wants you to develop a curriculum for discipling children around ages 7 to 13.” My job as the Bible teacher comes with developing curriculum for children in grades 3-8. Talk about accuracy in hearing from God on my husband’s part!
2. Almost 4 years ago, shortly after Stephen and I moved to California for ministry I had two dreams about working at MBCS. I saw the deep blue wall downstairs with the painted eagle soaring in the sky. I saw myself in the staff room near the copywriting machine. I saw myself walking the halls upstairs. The dream felt so peaceful and so real that afterward, I started looking for job openings at MBCS but I never saw any. Eventually, I quit looking and started my own home daycare which I ran for 2 1/2 years. I figured if the dreams were from God, it would happen. And now, it’s happening!
3. About 2 years ago, I went on a “spiritual retreat.” During my time there, a lady walked up to me and said, “I felt the Lord showed me a picture of you…I saw you sitting before children, and you had a filing cabinet, and you were giving each child a book. Each of these books, you had written yourself.” At the time she shared that with me, I didn’t think I would write children’s books…. but I’ve secretly written two so far and I know there will be more to come!
4. When I was first hired by MBCS almost a year ago, I took the job as a preschool teacher. I have loved working at the preschool. But during these past 9ish months some things happened where all my early childhood credits were not qualified for the state of California. I felt a bit frustrated but started from scratch again and began taking CA ECE classes. During my time at the preschool, a friend of mine who prayerfully saw the gift of God in me would tell me repeatedly, “you don’t belong here. You should be teaching the Bible somewhere and writing books.” I would brush off her comments, but she kept them up and she prayed over me many times for an opportunity for ministry work that both aligned with my gifts/talents and God’s calling. How amazingly God spoke though her and answered her prayers!
5. When the principal brought up to me the possibility of being the Bible teacher, I felt it was too good to be true. Even though several people asked for/about the Bible position (people I felt had more teaching experience and were capable/qualified), the principal chose me. And I am sooo incredibly excited and full of joy over having a job position that aligns with the holy passions God placed in my heart: being a part of weekly chapel, facilitating worship, writing, Bible teaching, prayer, teaching dancing, etc. Not to mention the big pay raise
~There are so many more details I can share (including areas where I had to grow/mature). There were so many intricate details, confirmations and beautiful things the Lord did to set me up to bring me to this current place. I can think of few higher honors than to teach children/pre-teens about who God is. MBCS/MBCPS has grown to 200ish students (this is the largest I’ve ever known to the school to be). All I can do is praise God and thank everyone who has been a part of this journey!
Whatever God has called you to, I promise it will be full of joy. His paths for you are full of who He is: joy, peace, life, love, abundance etc. God is good! He is beyond the goodness you’ve experienced. I hope this encouraged you about your future with Him!
You have made known to me the path of life; You will fill me with joy in Your presence, with eternal pleasures at Your right hand. -Psalm 16:11
~If you feel inclined, I would warmly appreciate prayer for me that I would: truly hear from God as I teach and prepare lessons about Who God Is. That I will be sensitive to the ways God wants me to speak, interact and reach out to the students (May I always be open to the leading of the Holy Spirit). Please pray for the kids to know God personally, to receive his amazing love, to have a real encounter with Him (that the world can’t take away) and that they would see Him as He truly is. Above all, pray that God’s kingdom will come and that his will be done over all the staff, and families that attend MBCS. May all his good purposes prevail and may we always be lead of Him.
“The LORD your God is in your midst, A Warrior who saves. He will rejoice over you with joy; He will be quiet in His love [making no mention of your past sins], He will rejoice over you with shouts of joy. -Zephaniah 3:17 AMP
The way God loves is just sooo deep, sweet and especially personal . For many years I didn’t know He was like this.
This evening as I was having one on one time with Him during a long drive, I began to become enraptured in worship. I sang to Him. As heartfelt music played in the background, I sang loudly with the passionate emotions bubbling with me, “You are my hallelujah (my praise, my joy )!” Just as I was becoming in awe that He was mine, I felt a holy pause in my soul and it was like He sang these same lyrics to me, “You (Ashley) are mine… hallelujah!” It was like He was rejoicing over the fact that I am his. As if He were giving himself kudos and congratulations for winning me. It reminded me of the Bible verses in Zephaniah that talks about God rejoicing over us in his love!!!
I almost pulled over on the side of the road as tears rose to my eyes from his affectionate love and I felt the anointing and presence of the Holy Spirit in the car with me.
Years ago when I was in Bible college, I closed my eyes and I saw a Man coming toward me with speed. He was running with all his might and strength (picture a scene with Tom Cruise running in one of the mission impossible movies). The sun behind Him was glorious and He was silhouetted in golden light brighter than fire… everything behind Him was washed with radiating sunlight. Every blade of grass, all the waters of the lake beside us, every strand of wheat was glowing like glimmering auburn stars.
Somehow I knew, this was Jesus just after He rose from the dead and walked out the tomb…there was a joy in Him that was powerful (the Bible says in Hebrews 4:2, “for the joy set before Him, He endured the cross…” (we are a part of that glorious joy). As He ran, He flung his arms open and declared, “You are Mine! I have you now! I have won you! I love you! You are finally Mine!!!”
The scene reminded me of what Jesus might have described when He told the story of the prodigal son in a parable that was meant to reveal the nature of God…the Father ran toward the sin-stained son in that story, threw his arms around him and wept from overwhelming love (which was a cultural disgrace for an elder/old man of wealth to run back in those days…especially since he probably would have to hold up his robe to keep from tripping).
When I pictured Jesus running toward me in that vision, I felt I had to open my eyes and end the vision before He got any closer. His love was too powerful, too pure, too passionate, too holy, too amazing and I wasn’t used to it (I felt like a person born blind having to gaze upon sunlight for the first time…the brilliance was too bright, too blindingly good and splendid ).
I think of why Mel Gibson named the movie about Jesus’s suffering, The Passion? Did he name it that to describe the passionate, excruciating pain of Jesus’s suffering, lashing, crucifixion, persecution and eventual death? He certainly captured the pain more than any movie producer I’ve known. Seeing scenes from the movie was almost too unbearable and I would turn away or close my eyes on certain parts. But even deeper, I’m beginning to see that there was something more powerful than the pain Jesus suffered on the cross that He was looking forward to. It was joy. It was the joy of having us . His love was greater than the greatest human suffering.
The Father’s love for you is greater than any suffering you’ve experienced on earth !
So much goodness! Dear, beloved Jesus !
Recently these lyrics from Steffany Gretzinger’s song More To Me, have left an imprint on my heart more sweet than a steaming bath of incense:
“Visions of Celestial Love is a book of inspiring quotes and beautiful prose about God’s unconditional love for mankind. The insights of this book help us to understand that it was the Father’s great love for us that made a way for us to have life together with His Son, Jesus Christ. Through it we get a glimpse into the true meaning of Christ’s sacrifice of love expressed through His death, burial and resurrection as God’s magnificent gift of grace to us. His blood made it possible for all those who put their faith in Him to have fellowship with His Father again.
I am confident that at the completion of this book, you will also seek after God with your whole heart and want to be in His presence forever.” —Alice Paige, True-Heart friend of author
“The truth of the gospel is intended to free us to love God and others with our whole heart. When we ignore this heart aspect of our faith and try to live out our religion solely as correct doctrine or ethics, our passion is crippled or perverted, and the divorce of our soul from the heart purposes of God toward us is deepened.”- Brent Curtis
Father has been teaching me so much in this season about how important it is to walk in love. I feel like I get this lesson every few years and I have a feeling my whole life will be marked by it. Every time I dive into this lesson with Jesus, I get a deeper taste of how unified love is with God’s heart. It’s His heartbeat. And it doesn’t look like what I’ve been taught. Love looks like the life of Jesus. I’m starting to see His willingness to be crucified for us as a worship song…the clearest image and example of godly love. An act that yes, was for us, but ultimately an act that was like kneeling in the dirt with His arms up in shout-full praise and worship to God. His death brought forth life for us.
The command to lay down my life (selfishness and ego) is becoming attached to this eternal song in Jesus’s heart. I can almost hear it ringing from the cross, like music with His pulse as the drumbeat. A life truly surrendered and given to God. A worshipful marriage at the heart level. A unification that is so strong and powerful, that our identities become interwoven. A seal so permanent that it is more binding than two metals being molted together. A constant cycle of being loved and then loving in return until it leads to washing feet. Until selfishness is constantly denied. Until the ego is washed with truth. Until there is not just “me” but there is “us.” Until His Holy Spirit inside of me begins to do the work and I lay down whatever crown on my head at His feet in perfect knowledge that no one can boast in His presence…because the strength to perform is from Him living within (grace). It was never dependent upon my strength. Heaven’s miracles are all from His grace and truth -John 1:17.
I’m realizing that the love of Jesus is not passive, mousey or weak. It’s not sickly sweet (it doesn’t allow for abuse). Yet, His love is not so hard that it cannot be moved. His love is not cold, religious or lifeless…rather it’s powerful truth and healing grace. It’s wisdom and self-control. It’s giving and wholehearted. Like a blend of ocean and mountain it’s hard to describe but it can be felt. It’s simply…perfect and beautiful.
1 John 3 & 4
It’s as simple as falling in love with Him.
I pray God takes you deeper into His heart. I pray you are taken inside the closest alcove of His friendship. And I pray He shows you His amazing love for you. I also pray you develop a closer relationship with Him. Like Esther was invited inside the treasury of the king before meeting with him in her preparation, may the Holy Spirit open up to the treasury of God’s heart and may you adorn yourself with the eternal jewels and characteristics that are most important to your Heavenly King.
xoxo
For more words like this, check out my book, Visions of Celestial Love (A devotional book about the heavenly and fatherly love of God):
“Ashley’s book, Visions of Celestial Love is just that; a visionary work of epic proportions. It is glimpses into a loving and remarkable relationship with the creator of the universe.
You are invited to Dive into stories of love and compassion, healing and provision, loss and recovery, profound grace and faith. Ashley draws us in with her descriptive prose and unique style of writing.
There are so many stories to relate to in this book and I’m sure you will find your own story among the many that are told here. So, find your favorite spot, your favorite beverage, and curl up with “Visions of Celestial Love”! -Amazon Reviewer
Why do men try and be their own god? How can the created know or surpass the Creator? Why do men worship nature, science, the created order, physical possessions, and knowledge when God is the One who founded and thought of all those things?
Why do men worship their own pleasure even at the cost of hurting others when God is the source of all beautiful, enjoyable, pure, healthy and wholesome pleasure?
Men seek power, fame, sex, and wealth to fulfill them when God offers these as blessings through wisdom to certain people at certain times. Yes, God gave our skin sensors so we could feel pleasure, God gave us taste buds so we could enjoy food, God gave us wine, God gave us majestic mountains, green rolling hills, birds of color, rainbows, sky, rivers, good families, bountiful oceans teeming with life, honey, emotions, music etc.
God isn’t boring. He’s not dull, He’s not hateful, and He’s definitely not anti-fun. He’s the One who has blessed us with all these wonderful things to be enjoyed in their proper context. Not to be indulged in without thought, and certainly not to be enjoyed more than Him (thus making that thing your god).
Everyday I realize I need a humility check. I know nothing without God. My weakness is my greatest strength…because He fills my weaknesses with His strength. The pride of man is one of our greatest downfalls. God is the only One who can give man the eternal joy man craves. He is our greatest pleasure, and when we come to that conclusion we can enjoy His blessings as just that…blessings, and not gods. God is most beautiful
"The glory of God is man fully alive." -St. Ireneaus
This has been one of my favorite quotes of all time.
Ever since I first heard it I’ve wondered, what does it mean to be fully alive?
To have no dead part in you?
No sick part in you?
No unhealed part in you?
No bitter root in you?
No envy in you?
No insecurity in you?
But to live with eyes alight and flooded with truth. To live with a heart moving with the love of God and nothing else. To have the breath of the Spirit of God rushing through every corridor of your body, spirit and soul.
What does that look like?
It must have looked something like the garden of Eden, where man could actually walk with God our true Father, and our Creator. The only One who can heal every part of us and knows, even beyond our own knowledge, exactly what we need.
What’s it like to walk with someone who knows you more than you do?
So many people want to be known, long to be known and understood and loved despite the fear of the risk of being truly seen.
But we don’t just want to be seen by anyone, but by someone who is special and not just this… but great. One who is able to heal, to restore..to breathe heavenly life in us.
We all long for our Maker.
What’s it like to see the One who knows you most and talk to Him in His fullness?
It must feel like being fully alive. It must look… like Jesus (the most accurate view of the love of God put into human flesh)
-For more inspirational words, subscribe!
“Ashley Thompson’s book, Visions of Celestial Love is just that; a visionary work of epic proportions. It is glimpses into a loving and remarkable relationship with the creator of the universe.
You are invited to Dive into stories of love and compassion, healing and provision, loss and recovery, profound grace and faith. Ashley draws us in with her descriptive prose and unique style of writing.
There are so many stories to relate to in this book and I’m sure you will find your own story among the many that are told here. So, find your favorite spot, your favorite beverage, and curl up with “Visions of Celestial Love”!
Then God said, “Let Us (Father, Son, Holy Spirit) make man in Our image, according to Our likeness… -Genesis 1:26 AMP
And the LORD God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul. –Genesis 2:7
How precious do you believe you are to God?
Every single one of us are so loved by God. He has, does and will love us with everlasting love. In his eternal wisdom and mercy, He planned our salvation and our admission into his heavenly family.
Recently Jesus showed me that when He released his last breath and gave up his spirit on the cross…that it was like God (Triune) breathing breath into Adam’s/my/our body and then Adam becoming a living soul…a son of God.
We have become children of God by putting our trust in what Jesus accomplished on the cross. (1 John 3:1)
There is so much wonder in the what Jesus did on the cross. There is so much love and so much grace.
I felt like Father told me that He has never stopped looking for Adam. He looks for Adam in unbelievers today. He lovingly searches for them so He can breathe his Spirit breath into them like He did for us.
He has never stopped wanting mankind to live in fellowship with Him in a heavenly place (once called Eden), now called the Kingdom of Heaven which is near us and in us by his Holy Spirit. (Romans 14:17)
Like He breathed into Adam…He breathes his Spirit, his love, his very life into us.
There’s more glory and love from God that He wants you to experience and receive…there’s so much more .
The Father’s love is boundless.
His plan is eternal.
His wisdom is magnificent.
I hope you continually increase in the experiential knowledge of his amazing love for you. He had you in his mind before time began. (Romans 8:29)
Father God has your face imprinted on the palm of his hand (Isaiah 49:16 AMP). I know it’s tradition for some people to tattoo the names or faces of loved ones on their bodies. God has shown his love in yet another way, by putting your face on his palm. And while I’m not sure if this looks exactly like our human example of a “tattoo” it does mean that you are “ever before” Him. He is mindful of you.
Jesus displayed the greatest love, in giving his life on the cross for you. (John 15:13) . And He bears the marks of his love for you on his wrists.
When Jesus had cried out again in a loud voice, He yielded up His spirit. At that moment the veil of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom. The earth quaked and the rocks were split.… -Matthew 27:50-51
If you would like a compilation of words on the Father’s eternal love for you, check out my book, Visions of Celestial Love, by clicking here. It is filled with the things Father has shown me. His love for you is deep. He woos you with transformative grace, steadfast compassion and cleansing truth
“Ashley Thompson’s book, Visions of Celestial Love is just that; a visionary work of epic proportions. It is glimpses into a loving and remarkable relationship with the creator of the universe.
You are invited to Dive into stories of love and compassion, healing and provision, loss and recovery, profound grace and faith. Ashley draws us in with her descriptive prose and unique style of writing.
There are so many stories to relate to in this book and I’m sure you will find your own story among the many that are told here. So, find your favorite spot, your favorite beverage, and curl up with “Visions of Celestial Love”!” –Amazon Reviewer.
So you have not received a spirit that makes you fearful slaves. Instead, you received God’s Spirit when he adopted you as his own children. Now we call him, “Abba, Father.” -Romans 8:15 NLT
It took me a while to call God my Abba Father. Like most Christians that I’ve meet, I mentally acknowledged that He was my Father and I would even attribute that title to Him in my prayers…but I did not know Him in the sweet, warm and assuring way a child knows a loving father. I would not have run into his arms like a little girl would do if her father came home and bent a knee so he could scoop her up.
Thankfully, over the years God has slowly, patiently, tenderly and steadily ushered me into the safety of his arms. Years ago I was sitting on my sister’s couch in her room and I was looking up at the ceiling as I talked to God. I began thanking him for adopting me into His Family. I thought I was doing pretty good with my thanksgiving…I thought I understood his love and the whole adoption thing, but I didn’t discern the depths of his affection…so He stopped me. “Ashley,” He said, “you were always my child.” After He said that, I realized, He always meant to adopt me. In His heart, I was always His. This is true of you. He always loved you as a child.
Years after that I was reading the book of Hosea and God began writing poetry to me. I heard Him whisper inside my heart, “you are a reflection of all my affections.” The instances where his love has caught me off guard and wooed were so numerous that I finally began to allow my soul to marinate in the anointed, fragrant waters of his heart.
I’ve learned that it’s okay to call Him “Daddy” even when I’ve messed up. I’ve learned to lean into his warm chest and relax at his touch. I’ve learned that He just wants me…no strings attached. There’s no need to fear that his love will ever let go.
Like Hosea, He chases me even when I’ve been unfaithful and I finally stop trembling for fear of Him but I tremble at his goodness: But afterward the people will return and devote themselves to the LORD their God and to David’s descendant, their king. In the last days, they will tremble in awe of the LORD and of his goodness. -Hosea 3:5
I melt from the fire of devotion that blazes in His eyes.
One night as I lay in bed…my pillow wet with tears as familiar condemning thoughts sought to uproot what He had planted in my heart (the seeds of His faithful devotion to me), I thought I saw a glimpse of Him at the foot of my bed. His eyes wet like rivers and verse after verse flowed over me like warm spiced waves:
“How can I ever give you up? My heart recoils within me. My compassion’s are kindled together!” -Hosea 11:8.
I realized it hurt Him deeply that I doubted his devotion. I realized it pained Him that I was in pain (Hebrews 4:15). This realization of his steadfast and faithful love toward me produced such trust and personal love for him in my heart. This personal love for him became the sweetest source of peace for me as I drew close to him with my heart. I finally rested in his arms and I soon began to worship him with my soul.
And so He became the Lover of my soul, my God, my Father, my Friend…everything that I trust. My resting place. My secure Rock. My King and the only One that I bow down to in reverence. So for love of him, I’ve learned to love his truth, his righteous ways, his eternal Word. Love has captivated my heart forever.
I pray that no matter what season of life you’re in right now, that you would allow yourself to be deeply loved. I pray all your days will be swept up in the arms of your heavenly Daddy. His arms are the safest place you will ever be. His devotion and affection for you is undying, pure, powerful, healing and faithful. May your world be lite with his love more than the sun’s rays lights this planet.
~For a book on discovering the divine love of God, check out devotional book, Visions of Celestial Love. May your heart be blessed with eternal words of beauty, grace and peace:
“Ashley presents us with a true cornucopia of modern psalms, personal testimonies, and short stories. She has set out to reveal and unravel some of the most complex heart issues mankind faces in our quest of understanding what true intimacy with God really looks like. Prepare to have your soul massaged and worked on as you read Visions of Celestial Love.” — Jeremy Minard, Servant King Apparel
Knowledge without power bespeaks a lack of intimacy.
Just as natural as it is for the union of a husband and wife to produce a new creation, so natural it is for intimacy with Jesus to produce the power of God’s kingdom.
Truth received in the heart will always perfume the scent of the Man of Truth.
The wonders of communion with him looks like being naked and unashamed. There is no area of him that I don’t want to see. There is no area in me that I conceal from him.
Everything is laid bare before him. We are in covenant. All that he is is mine and all that I am is his. This is what marriage is. The two shall become one flesh, so that they are no longer two but one (Mark 10:8). “This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.” (Ephesians 5:32 ESV).
When I was a new wife, I was naked and ashamed. My husband desired to see me. His desire was natural, good and even holy blessed by God. Because his desire reflected the level of knowledge that God wanted with me. This sort of thinking used to be sacrilegious to my previous legalistic mindset. But now I know better.
There came a point in my walk with God where I realized my fear of vulnerability was really self-preservation in disguise. Selfishness will always be a stumbling block to experiencing true love. If I have any fear of being transparent before my husband it is because I am self-focused (or self-centered) and thus fearful. But in God’s perfect love there is no fear (1 John 4:18). There is no room for the old self in the new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17).
Do you know what that means?
Jesus hung on a cross…in public…naked. (I wish you could read that as slowly as it takes to truly understand it).
He was executed in way that was meant to bring him the most shame. His enemies were true sadists. They enjoyed seeing people tortured– It gave them a sick kind of pleasure.
I’ve never seen a movie where the actor playing Jesus was stripped completely naked. I’ve seen several movies where the actor was brutally beaten. I’ve seen movies where the actor’s skin was shredded and floods of blood trailed down. I’ve seen men try and portray the internal agony of Jesus. I’ve seen movies where “Jesus” wept bitterly and even church publicized screenings where Jesus bore the judgement of God for our sins in the spiritual realm. These screenings of “Jesus” taking on the curse of the law come the closest (in showing not only the physical beating but the spiritual transaction that took place). But I have yet to see an actor agree to be stripped naked on the screen.
Why do you think that is?
There is something in the heart of man that fiercely fears nakedness! I’m not talking about casual sex here, our culture is filled with the filth of that, but I’m speaking of the unfolding of oneself to another in true unashamed exposure.
There is a fear that fights for the last remaining terrain in your soul. It fights to keep the flag of freedom from waving the heavenly fragrance of myrrh in your heart. It fights to keep God out and it fights to keep you in bondage.
This fear is self.
When Jesus hung, naked on that cross for you he took away the shame of being naked.
If he could become naked for us, then we can become naked for him.
He invites us to be naked and unashamed.
There came a point in my Christian walk where I desired to know Jesus as he is. I yearned to worship him in spirit and in truth.
I didn’t want knowledge without union with him because it was self worship.
It was safe religiosity; like kissing a picture of my husband while the real man was standing before me. I wanted intimacy with a Person not intimacy with words.
Sometimes when people read my writing about Jesus, they become uncomfortable:
Wine and milk? Candlelight dinners? Anointing oil on skin? Bread and cheese? Kisses from scripture? Song of Solomon sonnets to Christ?
I wonder if some people find my words too risky, too unorthodox, too sacrilegious?
I’ve discovered that it takes more “gut” to be married to Jesus than my husband Stephen. The level of union is far greater. While my husband and I can and do become one in body, soul and sacrificial love…our unity isn’t indwelling. I can leave his side and go to the grocery store while he remains at home with our daughters. Yet, my unity with Jesus is inseparable. He lives inside of me. It doesn’t just happen in a moment of ultimate vulnerability–like when husband and wife make love. But He circumcised my heart and moved in (Romans 2:29 and Ephesians 3:17).
All circumcisions spill blood.
In my marriage with Stephen, my blood was shed when we first consummated our holy covenant. When Jesus consummated his marriage to the church, he bled profusely on a tree. When Jesus moved inside of me, my heart became the womb of his seed (Matthew 13:1-23, 1 Peter 1:23). When I said “I do” to Jesus my heart was circumcised. The blood of my old man was spilt open unto death and I became a new creation–one molded and tailored to be his wife. I was instantly recreated by God to be compatible for his Son.
In the same way that God looked for a spouse for his “first” son Adam and didn’t find one, so He looks for a bride for Jesus (Genesis 2:18). In the same way He created Eve out of the body of Adam, He created the church out of the body of Jesus Christ (Genesis 2:22-24 and Ephesians 2:10).
You see, in the same way that I can’t truly love someone unless I know them, so we cannot truly love God unless we know him.
Years ago I realized that I had a “religious” love for God.
It would be shallow for me to walk up to a casual acquaintance and say, “I love you.” This kind of love isn’t based on knowledge. This person is very unlikely to feel safe before me. Because love is based on trust and trust is based on truth. Without truth there isn’t light (1 John 1:5-6 and John 5:33-35). Without light, there is blindness. I can’t fully enjoy getting to know my husband if we only talked, hugged or kissed in the dark. If I truly love him, then I want to see him. I want to get to know him in the light. I want to look him in the eyes, read his facial expressions, see his smile. I would want to study the terrain of his face, the way lines form on the edge of his eyes when he smiles. I’d want to study him and through that visual study I would become aware of things–like the way he strokes his chin when he’s thinking.
For the past year or so of my life, I have become desperate for truth. I have cried out for wisdom, knowledge and understanding. I have become panged for the desire to see life the way God sees it, regardless of societal norms, philosophies, and pipeline virtue. I have surveyed the world’s definition of social justice and considered it deplorable suffocating ashes compared to the vibrant, pure light of God’s truth.
Throughout this season, I have seen these eternal truths like jewels in the robe of faith-righteousness that the Holy Spirit has donned me in. This heavenly decoration has caused me to appreciate the book of Psalms (particularly Psalms like Psalm 119) and Proverbs in fresh ways I haven’t before. I have found vibrant pearls of life in His Word and I pray this continues on until I am found to be one who is “after His heart” (1 Samuel 13:14) and until I honor, esteem and submit to my Father’s words as much as Jesus did when He walked the earth as the Son of Man (Isaiah 7:14-15 and John 5:30).
I don’t know how to fully express in words, this level of intimacy with Christ. This garden of Eden relationship with God that I have longed for and prayed for and still seek (I am learning how to surrender).
Lately, I have sensed the promptings of the Holy Spirit in a deep and new way, Just a couple of weeks ago, I felt the grief of the Holy Spirit standing outside Planned Parenthood when a pregnant mother walked out of the clinic with a bag of chemical abortion pills. Before the evidence of her reasons for being at Planned Parenthood were visible, the Holy Spirit pointed her out to me. The second I saw her, exit her car to go into the clinic, I felt the pull of the Holy Spirit inside of me to reach her…it was like a magnetic attraction. And I knew God had sent me to the clinic after work to reach her.
“Excuse me, can I give you this?” I asked, offering her a pillow box full of pro-life resources where she could receive free housing, medical attention, clothes, etc.
“No, I don’t think so.” She responded.
After she declined my offer of help and hope, I felt the grief of the Holy Spirit. It was like I could taste His tears inside my soul and the depths of His anguish, caused my knees to totter. I told the beautiful mother to “have a good day” and after she entered her car, I dropped to my knees on the cold pavement and could barely contain the holy cry of the Lord that produced tears in my physical eyes. As I felt God’s pained love for the boy or girl growing inside of the young mother’s womb, I realized once again how deep, depraved and dark abortion was. A unique, individual, conscious, innocent, vulnerable person whose only crime was their existence would die unless other intervention was made and the only One who could truly hear their cry was God. The sheer pain, of sharing this pain with God’s Spirit, produced a grief in me that is indescribable. (Genesis 4:10, Psalm 72:12-14, Leviticus 18:21 are examples of God hearing the cry of innocent blood).
My body is slowly becoming a living sacrifice, a true vessel of spiritual worship (Romans 12:1), where my emotions are shared with His emotions and His emotions are shared with me, where my thoughts are shared with His thoughts, and His thoughts are shared with me.
I’ve been in the ebb and flow of this ultimate surrender since my new birth. I have waxed and waned like the tides and the moon, and tip-toed around the altar of living sacrifice for over a decade as I have apprehensively and longingly studied the bright flames and smelled the burnt aroma. Meanwhile, I have enjoyed the benefits of the ultimate sacrifice of Jesus and been warmed by the flames of His surrender to God. I have smelled the sweet fragrance of His worshipful execution and resurrection all the while knowing, I am called to lay atop His broken body and do as He did so that I can be raised into the fullness of new life with Him and reign in life through His royal life inside of me.
My prayer is to one day truthfully live out the words of Paul here: I have been crucified with Christ, it is no longer I who live but Christ who lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God who loved me and gave Himself for me. (Galatians 2:20).
Recently, I’ve had dreams reflecting things that God wants to tell me, I’ve had prophetic understanding of things and insight into things before they happen. Recently, I went into a church service and it was as if the evangelist had spoken “word for word” on what was going on between me and Jesus behind closed doors. His message was a mirror reflection of what the Lord had been telling me.
Where the Lord wants to take me is a place He wants to take all of his children. This isn’t super spirituality. This isn’t only for a few…I believe Jesus wants to be extremely close to you and I. He died to remove all obstacles from unifying us with himself. He wants oneness with us. And He wants us to walk in unity with each other through our submission and deep love for Him. The natural flow of loving Jesus will be to love His church.
My prayer for you and I is that the Word will be made flesh in the garden of our hearts until our unity with Jesus is so deep and wide, our identity will be rooted and grounded in Him. I pray His life will flow from us as easily as we inhale and exhale. I pray we will seek Him first (above all else) and be made whole in the presence of our Creator and the greatest Lover of our souls.
For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified. (Romans 8:29)
~For an inspirational book on finding intimacy with God, check out my book, Visions of Celestial Love. It is full of my personal prayers, devotionals, and short testimonies of encountering God in everyday life.
~For a beautiful worship song on becoming one with Jesus through surrender, click here (I do not own any rights to the music).
“Visions of Celestial Love is a book of inspiring quotes and beautiful prose about God’s unconditional love for mankind. The insights of this book help us to understand that it was the Father’s great love for us that made a way for us to have life together with His Son, Jesus Christ. Through it we get a glimpse into the true meaning of Christ’s sacrifice of love expressed through His death, burial and resurrection as God’s magnificent gift of grace to us. His blood made it possible for all those who put their faith in Him to have fellowship with His Father again.
I am confident that at the completion of this book, you will also seek after God with your whole heart and want to be in His presence forever.” —Alice Paige, True-Heart friend of author
And He died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves, but for Him who died for them and was raised again. So from now on we regard no one according to the flesh. Although we once regarded Christ in this way, we do so no longer. Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away. Behold, the new has come!…2 Corinthians 5:15-17a BSB
His reality… is the only true reality.
Everything else is only smoke and mirrors.
I throw off my other identifications. I toss away my perceptions of reality. I consider my human accomplishments as dross and waste. I cast off the cards and boxes that the world has said define me. I throw away my woman-card, my black-card, my small business woman card, my middle class card, my Thompson card, my McClelland card, my Republican card, my Democratic card…all identifications must bow before the One who emptied Himself of heavens glories and His position to fill me. He died to define me.
He is Truth. Thus, He is Light. The Light of the world. Isaiah says He is SO glorious, so brilliant, so radiant that the sun and moon shall be ashamed of their light in comparison with His ! My mind is blown away when I think of the shame that the sun will feel!!! The light from the sun gives life to everything on earth! Think of it.. photosynthesis, warmth, heat, the ability to see.
But this Jesus! His light far surpasses the sun’s! John says that Light has already come into the world but men loved darkness instead of the Light. This Light isn’t like the suns. This Light is Truth…Truth that requires surrender and yieldedness of belief. This Light pierces through the darkness of human understanding, philosophy, logic and burns away all pride and rebellion. This Light shines in the center of the human heart like the sun shines in the center of the Milky Way. Everything within you must move around and yield to the gravitational pull of Jesus.
Some men didn’t even recognize the Light. But this Light was the Life of all men. And this Light lives in each believer! How could we let such pettiness like political differences, minimal doctrine differences, unforgiveness, hurts, etc, drown out the Truth! The Truth of who we are and Whom we belong to. There is a Truth that exists in heaven and this Truth has left us His Light.
There is a reality that exists in heaven that needs to come down to earth. He prayed, “your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.” I choose to cast off the labels, the carnal humanism thinking that resists and rebels against God.
When you seek the Truth, there is only One whom you will find…His name is Jesus Christ
This is not self-realization or self-help.
This is self in Christ.
In Christ only.
Christ-reliance.
And all glory, all power, all authority is His!
Hallelujah!
For all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. And if you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham’s seed and heirs according to the promise.… Galatians 3:27-29a BSB