~A short devotional on healing, written by Stephen McClelland.
Jehovah Rapha. “I WAS, I AM, and I ALWAYS WILL BE your healing.”
Let’s say my hands were covered in dirt, with motor oil, or something else hard to get clean. Or, say I had an infectious disease like leprosy. If I touched you with my unclean hands, you would be unclean where I touched you.
But when Jesus touched a leper, Jesus didn’t become unclean and infected. The leper became clean.
The leper asked Jesus, “if you are willing, you can make me clean.” Jesus answered “I am willing, be made clean.” And He touched him.
A God that is still able, and just as willing. You can’t clean up enough to receive Him, His touch is what cleanses you. Whether it is physical healing, or something else in your life that makes you feel unclean and unworthy.
Not a God that heals, but a God that IS healing. Not a God that changes your circumstances and makes things hard on you to clean you up, but a God that exudes cleansing from within Himself.
All it takes is one touch. “Be made clean and whole.”
Stephen McClelland is a licensed minister and a church consultant . A graduate of Charis Bible College. He runs a radio show in California called Encounter, where he retells amazing personal stories of people experiencing Jesus. He has served God as a preacher and pastor, with a strong emphasis on relationship with God and hearing His voice. He runs a ministerial website where viewers can listen to inspirational messages designed to mature believers in grace and truth. To visit his webpage click here.
The land was wet with the
moisture of a previous rain. Blades of spring grass lush with life carpeted the
rolling hills in a sea of emerald green. Trees splashed the mountain sides like
jade gems. A translucent double rainbow bright like polychromatic flowers
formed a crescent behind misty rain clouds. The rising sun shone and cast
brilliant light over the hills that spilled down the mountains like gold paint.
Everything was alive, lavish, delightful.
Creation sang like an
echo of eternity. “He is good.” Everything He is displays goodness. How
wonderfully creation reflects your glory. It shows what Moses discovered when
You revealed yourself as good. His face shone and He trembled not to climb up
the mountain that boomed with power because He knew the heart behind the power…good. Transcendent thoughts bloom in my
mind from the beauty of your creation. Is this what your kingdom is like? Your
kingdom of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit?
I smile as I realize…you offer eternal beauty in the hearts of men. You bring amazing comfort with the breath of your Spirit. Heaven has come to earth in those who are fully yielded to you. This is a matter of trust, this is an invitation to surrender. Seeing your goodness causes me to trust and rest on your shoulder.
I can yield, I can bow, because You are eternal beauty defined. I can surrender because You are light where there is no shadow and every good and perfect gift comes from your hand. –James 1:17.
~If you’ve enjoyed this short devotion, check out my book Visions of Celestial Love. It’s filled with mini devotions just like this one. Enjoy a cup of coffee, a pumpkin spice latte or a cup of herbal tea as you savor each moment with Father.
“Ashley presents us with a true cornucopia of modern psalms, personal testimonies, and short stories. She has set out to reveal and unravel some of the most complex heart issues mankind faces in our quest of understanding what true intimacy with God really looks like. Prepare to have your soul massaged and worked on as you read Visions of Celestial Love.” — Jeremy Minard, Founder of Servant King Apparel, Active US Navy
His words defused my bad temper like a whiff of warm steam
meeting winter’s wind. My frustrations melted like butter smeared across baking
bread.
Suddenly, I knew God was talking to me.
You see, only moments ago I was boiling with frustration at
my bunny Charity.
I had been trying to potty train her for weeks and she was
taking longer than expected to learn this “simple thing.” (Yes, you can potty
train rabbits. It’s fairly easy actually).
Normally, I was very patient with her but I had grown tired
of micromanaging her every time I let her out of her cage. Whenever I took her
out of her cage, I would have to stop her from biting on furniture. I would
have to pick up her poo and scrub her pee out of the carpet. I would have to stop
her from digging into the rugs or chewing on the curtains, pillows and walls.
(Yes, bunnies are pretty destructive creatures. But their adorableness makes up
for it).
I wanted her to hop around the house because it gave her such joy. And it pleased me to see her happy and skipping around. She would dash from corner to corner and leap like a mountain goat. Her whimsical motions bubbled joy.
Because I loved her, I didn’t want her to be locked up in
the cage. That was not my heart’s desire for her. But every time I let her out
of the cage, her pleasure came at my expense.
Her freedom was WORK for me!
Finally, after several minutes of frustration one day, I
picked her up and placed her in the cage. I locked it shut and in my anger, I
proceeded to give her a lecture (completely ignoring the fact that bunnies do
not speak English). With my hands on my hips I fussed, “you know, if you would
just poop and pee where I’ve been showing you, you could be out of that cage.
If you wouldn’t chew on things you weren’t supposed to, then you could hop
around this house all day and hardly EVER have to be in your cage. I would let
you out all the time! This entire house could be yours freely if you would just
grow up!”
That’s when God spoke to me. He came like a Father in loving
correction (Proverbs 3:12).
His voice was full of healing truth, “I feel the same way
about you Ashley like you do your rabbit.”
My breath caught.
“Father?”
“Responsibility is freedom. I love it when you are able to
be free in my house because it gives you pleasure. But I have to follow behind
you and clean up your messes.”
I understood immediately what He meant. After all, I had just been through it with Charity (and suddenly, I was feeling more sympathetic toward her).
Now obviously I don’t scratch on walls, poop everywhere or bite on furniture like Charity does, but the analogy was cohesive to my reality during that time. I was attending Bible college, working as a prayer minister and my husband was about to start pastoring a home church. God was opening up his house to us in amazing ways…but He was saddened because He couldn’t allow me to roam freely in his home (at least not without a lot of tedious micromanagement).
“Everyone cries for freedom and desires to be free. However, most of us who cry for freedom do not understand freedom, or the nature of liberty. It is a tragic reality that we do not understand the qualifications of true freedom. True freedom demands
great responsibility, accountability, a spirit of stewardship, maturity, wisdom
and character.” –Dr. Myles Monroe, The
Burden of Freedom
You see, as children of God, our Father wants us to play freely in his house. He wants us to enjoy every aspect of our inheritance as his child. He wants us to know that the God who owns the earth, sky, heavens, and all the gold and diamonds is our Daddy. He wants us to fully enjoy our life. He wants us to experience the abundant life Jesus died and rose again for us to have.
In God’s house, there are many mansions (John 14:2). In each mansion, we can guess there are rooms. In all of His rooms there are pleasures unspeakable because his presence is there (Psalm 16:11). As a child of God, you have been given the inheritance of Jesus Christ. (Romans 8:17). You were put in Christ and Christ was put in you (1 Corinthians 1:30 and 1 Corinthians 6:17). You automatically became royalty when you were born again (1 Peter 2:9). And the noun “royalty” always denotes a kingdom.
Did you know that you are a part of a kingdom? A heavenly kingdom that exists (and is very active) even on earth? God delights in giving you the kingdom (Luke 12:32). You are his precious child in whom He delights and loves. Like any loving father, God wants you to enjoy his house because it’s meant to be your home.
As with all royalty, you and I have great privilege but we also have great responsibility. In order for us to enjoy the freedoms of ruling and reigning in life through Jesus Christ we need to be mature. I am not talking about the free gift of salvation here but delegated leadership. We need to grow up by conforming to the image of Jesus Christ through grace (Romans 8:29). This growing up has looked a lot like embracing truth for me. It’s looked a lot like serving others and using my gifts and talents to encourage the body of Christ. It’s been a lot of bowing my knees to God in true worship by exalting his Word above my feelings and the philosophies of the world.
This maturing has yielded the most peace, blessing and immense joy in my heart. I can now walk through more rooms in my Father’s house without child-like “supervision.” Although I haven’t walked through all the rooms, I have much more freedom than I used to. And because of God’s grace and powerful transformation in my soul, I have now been placed in a small position of “government” in His kingdom (Isaiah 9:6). It is a huge thing to be entrusted by God to “tend his sheep.” (John 21:16). Tending the sheep for me has been one of the final rounded turns in the circle of godly love (1 John 4:6-13). The things that were once dreams in my heart are coming to reality.
My prayer for you is that you will embrace the process of growth in Christ. I pray that you will enjoy ruling and reigning in the area of jurisdiction that your heavenly Father wants to give to you. I pray you realize that you were predestined unto good works that God had in mind before you were born (Ephesians 2:10). I pray that you will see all your desires fulfilled by unifying yourself with Jesus and that this will not only bring you immense joy but draw your heart closer to Him. I pray that you will walk in the authority and power of the kingdom of heaven. May the earth see Jesus through you. May the world be blessed by the work of your hands. May the God of all hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope (Romans 15:13). May you never be lost in despair or darkness, but may the Light of the world (Jesus) shine upon you like the blazing morning sun. May all that’s ashes in your life be turned to beauty. May you recognize the royal robe of favor and sonship that has been donned on you through Jesus. And may you run your race to win. In Jesus name, amen. I’m cheering you on!
If you find yourself in need of some clarity on what your purpose is or if you know your God-purpose but don’t know how to reach it, I am a certified Christian Life Coach. I would love to partner with you on your journey to greater freedom. The King of Heaven is your Father and He has made you to display the splendor and majesty of heaven because you carry his image. More importantly, He loves you with an everlasting love and calls you to Himself. His plans for you are only good. He is not against you but for you (Romans 8:31). He never thinks ill of you. His thoughts toward you are precious and kind (Psalm 139:17).
Now these are the gifts Christ gave to the church: the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, and the pastors and teachers. Their responsibility is to equip God’s people to do his work and build up the church, the body of Christ. This will continue until we all come to such unity in our faith and knowledge of God’s Son that we will be mature in the Lord, measuring up to the full and complete standard of Christ. Then we will no longer be immature like children. We won’t be tossed and blown about by every wind of new teaching. We will not be influenced when people try to trick us with lies so clever they sound like the truth. Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church. He makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love. –Ephesians 4:11-16
I’m proud to announce that Charity is potty-trained now!
How can you love God until you know how much He’s saved you from? How can you truly become an intimate receiver of the healing love of God?
I exhaled and my chest relaxed. Warm soothing water lapped at my waist and steam lifted creating an aromatic bath of citrus and Himalayan salt incense. I didn’t realize until then, that I had been holding in my breath. It had been a long 13 hour day.
My mind drifted and I began to play quietly in the water. I waved my hands around under the comforting waters in lackadaisical motions. I wondered why Father asked me to take a bath instead of a shower? I almost refused to obey Him after surviving a long day.
Have you ever been so tired and weary that you didn’t even want to do the necessary and most menial things in life? Things like, brush your teeth or put on your pajamas? Well, my friend, you are not alone.
“Why should I take a bath Father when I can just take a quick shower?” I whined like the toddlers I worked with, “all I want to do is shower and sleep.”
I was at my wits end. I didn’t want to be up anymore. I just wanted sleep.
But God knew I needed peace instead.
As the stress of the day began to lift off of my body as lightly as the mineral salt steam from the water, my thoughts cleared.
My to do list began to evaporate, my breaths deepened. I drank in the air around me in large refreshing gulps. Sweet air filled my lungs.
I became aware of my body, particularly my legs which stretched out before me. I swirled my hands around and enjoyed staring at them through the clear water. Becoming a little girl, I cupped my hands together between my legs. I enjoyed the smooth way the water made my hands look.
I began to lift my cupped hands until they were out of the water. I studied the terrain of my hands and inhaled the fragrance of mineral scents.
My eyes slightly flickered as the water began to drip through the cracks of my fingers. For some reason this both surprised me and displeased me. An unconscious mindset of control slowly began to surface. I dipped my hands back into the water.
After cupping another handful, I pressed my hands together more tightly and squeezed my fingers. My effort was strenuous and borderline painful. After several seconds of trying to prevent the water from dripping down, I gave up. God spoke to me in that moment.
“No matter how hard you squeeze your hands together, you will not be able to prevent the water from slipping out.“
Has God ever spoken to you and within one sentence you received a whole message?
I knew He had come for my soul.
I knew He was petitioning me to receive saving grace.
For the true Christian faith is to remain in the grace that saved you. Everything is by grace through faith. (Colossians 2:6-10)
I knew there was a secret place within me that sought to save myself and be my own strength. The undercurrent of stress that I had been feeling throughout the day, until now, was an obvious indicator.
I felt a sore place deep inside being pricked and my heart-rate rose. A dull pain came and with it an unsuspecting panic. My breaths came sharply and quickly.
The true poverty of man is not recognizing their deep need. Until you stop trying to save yourself …how can you truly glory with joy and worship Jesus?
In that moment I was reminded of the weeping prophet Jeremiah. I felt his tears and realized they weren’t really his…but God’s. Jeremiah was smitten in his heart with the passionate, pure and fiercely devoted love of God for his bride. He had leaned into the fabric of God’s soul so entirely, that he began to feel His pain.
I remembered how God began to reminisce with as much affection as heartbreak on His bride. And He asked with tears choking his voice, “what did I do?! What fault did your fathers find in Me that they have turned from Me and followed after other gods?” (Jeremiah 2:5)
I felt a lump begin to rise to my throat in the tub. I knew I had been drinking from my own cistern and it was leaving me deprived and poisoned.
I remembered that God cried that his people refused to take from Him what He wanted to freely offer…rivers of living water. Everlasting life. Abundant life. Life that was truly rich, lush and healing. His heart tore that they were dying from trusting in the works of their own clay hands. He wept for them, because like me, their wells could never hold the water that they needed to sustain their lives. They were dying and it was of their own making. It was because of their own pride.
“for my people have committed two evils: they have forsaken me, the fountain of living waters, and hewed out cisterns for themselves, broken cisterns that can hold no water.” (Jeremiah 2:13)
Have you ever tried so hard to lay hold onto something you craved, only to have it slip through your fingers?
I realized that Israel had tried so hard to recreate something that God had already made perfect. They wanted to be strength for themselves when He was their strength. They attempted to hold water for themselves when He is the source of everlasting water. He had perfect water for them. Cool water. Refreshing water. Rejuvenating water. Eternal water. There was a never ending supply of water.
But for some reason they put more faith and more trust in the power of their own flesh— despite the fact that God provided water for them from a rock as they sojourned in the desert. He supernaturally gushed water from a rock and divinely fed them in the wilderness for forty years.
But they did not believe that they were the apple of his eyes even though He had shown it time and time again. They did not trust that He loved them with a sacrificial love. They did not believe that He did and always had their best interest at heart.
Without believing the love of God you cannot trust Him.
No matter how hard you try. No matter how strong your grip is…the water will still slip through the cracks of your fingers.
You cannot try hard enough. It will only produce striving, and with it frustration.
Stop.
Relax.
Breathe.
Be.
Dip your fingers in the bath water with me. And realize, that Jesus is the tub that you’re sitting in.
He’s the Lord of more than enough. He’s the well of Living Water.
What areas in your life are you trying to perfect when Jesus has already finished it?
If you have any stress in your life, it’s a clear indicator that you are striving somewhere within.
I invite you to join me in opening up to God so that He can fill you.
I admit, I have not completely stopped striving. But I am learning to go to Him and let Him provide for me. We don’t have to be perfect. We just have to allow ourselves to be perfectly His.
He is our perfection.
He is our strength.
He is our source.
~If you’ve enjoyed this short devotion, check out my book Visions of Celestial Love. It’s filled with mini devotions just like this one. Enjoy a cup of coffee, a pumpkin spice latte or a cup of herbal tea as you savor each moment with Father.
“Ashley presents us with a true cornucopia of modern psalms, personal testimonies, and short stories. She has set out to reveal and unravel some of the most complex heart issues mankind faces in our quest of understanding what true intimacy with God really looks like. Prepare to have your soul massaged and worked on as you read Visions of Celestial Love.” — Jeremy Minard, Founder of Servant King Apparel, Active US Navy
Are you weary, carrying a heavy burden? Come to me. I will refresh your life, for I am your oasis. Simply join your life with mine. Learn my ways and you’ll discover that I’m gentle, humble, easy to please. You will find refreshment and rest in me. For all that I require of you will be pleasant and easy to bear. -Matthew 11:28-30 TPT
He calls the soul to rest and receive at the table of intimacy.
Let Him feed you with grace, for it is good nourishment for your heart.
He longs to serve you true riches, the bread of eternal life.
Let Him wash you with the aromatic waters of mercy.
He yearns for the fabric of your being to be so potent with His mercy that the air in your lungs becomes like sweet incense–constantly reminding you that your sins are gone forever.
Let Him heal you with love.
He desires that you be made whole and complete through His love. His compassions are kindled together for you.
Let Him free you with truth.
His truth is like the sun. Just as the sun causes all things on earth to exist and allows us to see, so His truth does the same. Only His truth shines from the heart and gives life to the soul, body and the lives of those around you.
Everything good and life-giving comes from His hands. He loved you enough to die for you.
He rose again and forever makes intercession for you at the Father’s right hand.
No detail in your life, no burden in your soul goes unnoticed. His eyes are constantly on you.
Because, He cares deeply for you ❤️
~For more information on my recently published book, Visions of Celestial Love, click here.
“When I read Visions of Celestial Love, it is as if I am brought down to my knees to worship. What the Holy Spirit has done in and through Ashley, He is doing also in me. What a wonderful experience. It is very rich. Thank you for sharing the treasure.”—Riko Suci Alam, CEO of Ligar Jaya and owner of Clove Garden hotel in Bandung Indonesia.
Right now, I just want a pumpkin spice latte (with real pumpkin puree), an electric blanket and my authoring buddy…my laptop. I’m thankful I have at least one of those.
It’s an
early crisp morning in October. My favorite season has come. Autumn. As the
weather cools my soul becomes warm in the glow of this solstice. It’s as if my
heart catches on to the last rays of sunshine like a candle being lit by a
match. I long to unearth the scents that make up my being as a candle does when
it is flamed. The perfume of Christ in me mingles with my own recreated heart
like clove and cinnamon in a coffee shop. I am perfumed with joy and peace.
Like the deciduous leaves that radiate ruby red, tangy
orange and honey yellow, I realize that even in death, there is life. Fall has
amazed me with its paradoxical differences: death, life, richness, reserve, copiousness,
and hibernation.
For farmers, this is the season of reaping everything they’ve sown. It’s a season of abundance, like the day before the Sabbath for them…they gather double what they need (Leviticus 25). I always imagine the husbandry wiping their perspiring foreheads with broad smiles on their bronzed faces. All the labor and work they put in has paid off. Now is their time of holy jubilee. Profuseness that produces rest. I look at Fall this way too.
Except for the trees, Fall is the time to release the leaves that absorbed sunshine for them. Fall is the season to shed their beautiful garments in one last glimmering bang. As their cloaks transform into sunny hued tones, they drift away from their once secure branches. Fall is the season for storing, preserving and releasing all unnecessary weights. It’s a transitional time.
I love the way the leaves rustle and then float away in the frigid
breeze. Wafts of something celestial awakens my heart even as I crunch my boots
on the quilted patterned earth.
This Fall brings me the soft reminder that because of Jesus’s death, I have new life. Because He emptied Himself of His divinity and became a man (Philippians 2:7), I have been graced with the Holy Spirit (Heaven’s presence in me). The trees begin to look like gnarled crosses to my hazel eyes. The leaves on the ground become a showmanship of all the false and flashy garments of works-righteousness that I used to wear. I learn to let go of self-effort and embrace the rugged cross. My heart sees the cross as the beginning place of birth. One life was exchanged for another. And I’ve heard from Messianic Jews that Jesus was known to be crucified in Autumn…not in winter (how factual this is, I’m not sure).
May this Fall bring you the sweet potency of Christ’s eternal love and sacrifice for you. May this Fall bring an abundance of life in your heart (John 10:10) even as you die to the lies of religion that shielded your nakedness and shame. God’s love will cloak you in new light and new birth. There is nothing like releasing our burdens to Him, only to have Him give us weightless life and freedom. May your soul be wrapped in the garments of heaven’s pure joy and the sugary water of hope. Like trees trust in their leaves to photosynthesis…. I pray you trust in the true sunshine of Christ to produce the food of peace in your mind and heart.
~If you were blessed by this blog, you will probably enjoy my book Visions of Celestial Love. You can find more about it on my Books page, or on amazon. God bless you!
~A vision that I was given when I was a teenager and first filled with the Holy Spirit.
He offered me something to eat as I was reading,
studying and writing down the Word of God. The countryside smelled of sugar and
dust. Months ago, I had been taken to this cottage of a mountain of honey hay
as delicate as a moth’s hair. I would stay here until the next Jubilee with
this angel of light. He asked me to call him Offer or Promise.
I
imagined rain from translucent azure waters falling through the roof and
creating pools and rivers of glowing water in the house. The hay outside, moved
like ripples in the wind and made waves of gold with every sweet, wistful
breeze. This mountain was the only amber one. All the others were lush jade
green. Often during sunsets, the ones in the distance paled into a lavender
purple made rosy with the hue and heat of the setting sun. These mountains
seemed as soft as mist.
I looked up from my work at Promise. His sculpted hand held out a pearly saucer with a tea-size emerald bowl on top. The bowl was filled with a white, pasty looking substance. Promise or Offer was beautiful and tall with long hair that shone like silver in the sun. His hair appeared as gentle as silk. His eyes were as majestic as thousands of mountains that touched the sky. Yet, his eyes were kinder than a mother’s love and deep with mystery. He often wore layers of clothes, all made for the flow of the wind. Today he wore a deep pine green robe with the floral words of heaven etched on the sleeves and hem.
I
took the food with a smile as “thanks” and set it on the polished wooden table.
He observed my writings and circled around the table before sitting down. I
felt celestial water below my feet. It lapped over my toes and was as soothing
as spa water, but when I looked down, all I saw was the white carpet. I didn’t
ask Offer what was going on. Things like that always happened here. Taking up a
spoon, I dipped it in the pasty white substance.
“It
is food and drink.” Offer said.
I opened my mouth and
ate. It was light, like fat-free yogurt and it liquefied in my mouth as if it
were whipped cream. It reminded me of a flaky pie crust sugared with cinnamon
and ginger. It was dissolvable because of the thinness. It slid down my throat
like a light mist and it seemed to dissolve into nothingness in my stomach.
Because of this, I took a big spoonful and stuffed it in my mouth before taking
another one.
“Easy.”
Offer said.
I
looked at him.
“Go
slow, it is filling you,” he continued.
I
knew his words were true, but it surely didn’t feel like it.
“You
sons and daughters of men take in too much too quickly before you are ready. It
fills you, I promise.”
He
folded his hands together and then quietly stood. Again, he circled me. This
time slower than the last. I saw his eyes peer at my work again which rested
beside the Bible.
“Think
of it as reading the Word of God. You must go slowly. You must digest what you
read and wait for full comprehension from Adoni before you continue. Most
people read much too much too quickly and then claim they know the Word of God.
They form their own opinions about it, or they listen to the incorrect, hasty
interpretations of others because they have not studied. They have not relied
on the Ruach Hakodesh to open their eyes of understanding. In this too they
become worshippers of themselves as they rely more on their mind than the mind
of the Spirit. Or they choose to become wedding guests instead of the Bride at
the Marriage Supper of the Lamb. Intimacy takes time…a life time.”
His
words were as pure as ice forming from a water cave in the arctic. “What are
you saying Promise?” I asked.
“Read
it to draw closer to Him.”
“I…thought
I was.”
“You
wrote three chapters.”
“I’ve
been here for hours. Are you saying three chapters is too much?”
He
nodded.
“How
much longer will I be here? All this must get done before that.”
“What
is that to you? That “longer” you speak of? He is in the past, the present and
the future. How then can this thing you know as time exist? Only He exist and He fills all.”
Promise
saw that I failed to comprehend. He sighed slightly and smiled fondly at me.
Somehow his visage assured me that all would be well.
“Our
Lord will give you enough time. In
the same way as He supplied enough manna for the Israelites, His chosen ones,
to eat in the wilderness everyday…He will supply you enough time. No more and no less dear one. Just
keep drawing near to Him with all your heart. Remember to soar, enjoy and
cherish every moment. Allow yourself to be put in all the way, in every
experience.”
I
believe I understood and nodded.
“Yahweh is not looking for quantity. He is looking for quality. A small diamond is worth more than a hundred tons of fool’s gold.”
…to be continued.
~If you’ve enjoyed this allegory, you may like my book Visions of Celestial Love. It is full of lessons that God has taught me since I first surrendered to Him. These lessons often look like “word pictures” for me. And remember, above all He wants intimacy with you. He wants your heart. He longs to sup with you in the secret place. <3
Top image by Quang Nguyen vinh from Pixabay. I chose this photo because the sun is shinning behind these men and their feet are standing on a mountain of salt. It reminded me of what Jesus said when He called us, “the salt and light of the world.” -Matthew 5:13-16.
~The following is a sneak peak of my upcoming book: At the Time for Love, based on Ezekiel 16 <3
…When I reached I saw he wasn’t there. My eyes widened and I nimbly made my way down the steps. My mind swam with ideas of where he might be and a part of me was hesitant to look for him. The air was cooler downstairs and I saw he had the curtains drawn back so the moonlight could spill in. The earth, blanketed with snow, glowed with moonlight more radiant than desert sands in the winter night. It was like a white ocean and my breath drew. Billions of stars hung like ornaments in the sky. They winked at me like silver bells. Withdrawing, I slowly stepped close to the bathroom build underneath the stairs. When I saw nobody was there I went into the kitchen. I noticed the coffee pot was damp with vapor. But nobody was inside. I went into the library, holding the walls in the dark of the hallway. When I reached the library, no light was on and nobody was in. I went into the washroom at the back and found he wasn’t there.
“Where are you?” I voiced quietly. I opened up the back door and saw not a soul. Closing it I folded my arms and shivered a little from the cold outside. Going back into the kitchen I cracked the front door open and saw a small candle burning in a lantern on the dirt road leading to the house. I squinted my eyes and saw the silver silhouette of a man in the distance. It was James!
Closing the door, I opened up the hall closet and put on dad’s boots and his great winter coat. After buttoning it up and placing a beanie on my head I went outside in the cold frosty air. My stride slowed as I neared him. I saw my breath before my face and smiled as it disappeared and blended with the cool of the air. I approached as quietly as possible, but before I was within ten paces of him he turned around. Silver light danced on his henna brown hair and the bronze terrain of his face was dappled with moonlight and shadow so that some of his features were hidden. He appeared so tall and stately, strong yet gentle. He moved to pick up the lantern and held it before his face. “Autumn?” he said surprised. His honey eyes luminous near the small flame.
“Yes, it’s me,” I voiced shyly.
“What are you doing outside? In the cold?” he reached to take off his jacket but I lifted my hand, “it’s okay. I put on my dad’s coat.”
He let out a sigh of protest but relented. His butterscotch skin seemed so smooth, and so warm against the cold of the white night.
“May I join you?” I asked walking to his side, my blue eyes glowing.
He gazed at me before blinking. A small sweet laugh came from his lips, “forgive me. I have to remind myself not to look at you…like that…for so long,” his words were coated with affection.
I blushed despite the cold.
“For a little while,” he responded.
“Just a little while?”
“Yes.”
When my brows crinkled he chortled, “Need I remind you that you almost suffered from hypothermia this morning?”
“But…”
“Sometimes it’s better to listen Autumn…without putting up a fight.”
“I don’t have red hair for nothing,” I quipped.
He smiled but remained quiet and looked up at the stars.
“Thank you for saving my life today…” I whispered.
He turned to me, “God saved your life today. I was simply His envoy,” he grinned, “a very happy emissary.” He turned again and I watched the stars with him.
Things remained quiet for about three minutes. Not one of us spoke. Everything was so still, serene. Only the faint musical sound of the occasional gust of wind tickled my ears. James took a sip of coffee from a thermos he was carrying. My nose picked up the mild sugary scent of winterberry. I glanced and saw the red hue of the candle in the lantern James was holding.
Enjoying the silence yet wanting to hear his voice more I asked, “what were you doing out here?”
“Talking to God,” his voice moistened in deep thought, “this is my quiet time with Him.”
“At night?”
“Yes…and early into the morning. That’s the time Jesus would go up to the Mount of Olives and pray to His Father. I find it’s the most fruitful time…when the world is quiet…when everybody is asleep. It’s just me and the Father. Some of my richest moments have come from these times. He teaches me things and I get to pour out my soul to Him and feast on His goodness. ‘More than the watchmen wait for the morning do I wait for You. O Israel, hope in the Lord; For with the Lord there is lovingkindness, And with Him is abundant redemption.…’”
“King David,” I whispered remembering the author of the scripture he quoted.
“Mmhmm,”
“Does He always speak?” I asked in wonder.
“…He’s always speaking. This is just a time that I’m usually quite enough to listen. It’s all about resting in Him.”
“….so, what has God been telling you tonight?”
“He’s reminding me.”
“Of what?”
“That there isn’t a person on earth that I love more than God. And because of that, I love every person on earth. Our hearts were made for one love. The perfect, full, gracious, lavish, and awesome love of God. From His heart, true benevolence and affection for people flows.”
I was quiet for a moment. His words were like a balm on my heart…sweet peace rose from deep within me.
“Wow…you summed that up so neatly.”
James gently slipped an arm around my shoulders and the lantern dangled from his gloved hand. I leaned into him and felt a warm mist coming from his skin. I began to feel light…and a deep sense of love.
“I feel God right now,” James said and suddenly tears pricked my eyes.
“I feel Him too,” I said softly, my voice quivering a little, “the moment we hugged…”
James laughed lightly, “I knew I wasn’t alone.” A deep sigh rose to his chest and then a long exhale, “you know Autumn…you’re the first girl that God has given me peace about. After I was born-again there were a few women I thought God might put me together with…but I lacked peace about every single one of them…even if everything looked perfect in the natural. But with you…it just feels so clear. It’s His pleasure flowing right now between us. I recognize it,” James began to laugh again.
My eyes widened with his words but then relaxed and soon I was laughing too. I laughed from an overdose of joy! I was in awe at the goodness of God. A verse came to my mind:When the Lord brought back the captives [who returned] to Zion, we were like those who dream [it seemed so unreal]. Then were our mouths filled with laughter, and our tongues with singing. Then they said among the nations, The Lord has done great things for them. The Lord has done great things for us! We are glad! –Psalm 126:1-3.
I turned and wrapped my arms around his waist, “who would have thought God would have given me such a wonderful man?” I closed my eyes and giggled.
James pulled me back a little, “from what I remember woman is the gift of man. It’s you who is the treasure. I’m the one who should be most thankful.”
A slight breeze blew past us, and snowflakes of the purest white dusted the sky. I saw my breath in the air and I closed my eyes and tilted my chin up. When I peeked, my eyes open a bright silver streak shot across the sky and I gasped.
“A shooting star!” I exclaimed.
James smiled widely, “yup, I’m definitely feeling like this is a God-moment.”
“All moments are God-moments,” I laughed to tease him.
“How right you are love,” he grinned and set down his lantern and coffee. He took my hands in his and instinctively I knew what to do. I began to circle him and then I ran. He held on tightly and swung me. I bent my knees and let out a “wwwwwhhheeeeee!” as he lifted me in the air.
Setting me down after about the fifth circle he took my hands again, resting one on his shoulder and keeping one. With his free hand, he held me above my waist and together we danced. Our eyes locked and all the world disappeared into a void behind him. All I could see was him and for a moment I was lost in his gleaming hazel eyes. He began to sing a love song to me and the sound of his rich, deep, and mellow voice in song undid all walls my heart had ever erected. Suddenly I enjoyed the godly gift of giving and receiving love in a flowing stream of divine pleasure.
My lips smeared into a crumpled smile and my eyes watered all over again.
We seemed to dance forever until he stopped. He kissed my hand before picking up his coffee and the lantern.
I was in a daze as he escorted me back to the house. We were both quiet again. I started to walk up the stairs but James didn’t release my hand. I looked back at him and his caramel colored face seemed to glow. Blades of his curly deep auburn hair had escaped from underneath his dark blue beanie. A muscle jerked in his jaw and he opened his mouth and then hesitated. I turned around, faced him and waited.
After several seconds he finally spoke, “I think it’s time to come clean.”
My heart jumped, “What do you mean?” I asked.
“I mean, well…I think I can come out and tell your father, mother and brother how much you mean to me.”
I could hear my heart in my ears and felt my pulse in my neck.
“Why my mother and brother as well?” I asked out without thinking.
“Because your mother and David are also authority figures in your life. And that position warrants the upmost honor.”
He saw how my eyes shifted in the candlelight.
“Are you ready, sweet one?” he asked and released my hand to rub the back of my arm lightly.
I chewed my bottom lip for a moment out of joyous thoughts and also nervousness. I was tempted to fear that my family would reject his request to court me, but I quickly denied those thoughts access to my mind. Hadn’t God already proven that He was faithful so many times?
I nodded my head slowly in response, a smile growing on my lips.
James beamed and appeared relived at the same time, “I’ve been praying about the right timing for a while now. And honestly, I feel like I could wait for you forever. You’re a treasure worth any price Autumn.” His voice became hoarse with emotion and my eyes misted. My heart felt full like a peach close to its fattest and sweetest state. He cleared his throat and continued, “it’s hard to explain, but I know somehow that God has been doing something in your heart that makes…now a good time. Even though whatever He is doing hasn’t fully…matured yet. I know you’re blossoming. Also, I want to be as honest and forthcoming with your family as possible. And I know they respectfully deserve to know my intentions. I have the highest regard for your family. They mean more to me than I can describe.”
“I know they do,” I said and took his hand. With trembling lips, I kissed his fingers gently and briefly. He seemed surprised and his eyes enlarged at my intimate gesture. I never blinked as I kissed him. I wanted him to know that my heart was swollen for him. I wanted to remove the emblematic veil from my face. James slowly withdrew his hand and kissed the exact same spot I had. My stomach fluttered and I felt my knees go weak.
After ascending the stairs James opened up the front door for me, “have a good night beautiful princess.” He bid me. I saw he was going back outside to talk to God. “Good night,” I whispered with a large smile, “enjoy your time with God.” Slowly he closed the door and I watched him from the window as he walked back to the spot where I met him. With the music of his voice still ringing in my heart I took off Papa’s coat, pulled off his beanie and kicked off my boots. I climbed up the hall stairs and curled up in bed, once more gazing up at the star streaked sky. All I could do was voice, “thank you God,” over and over again before I began drifting to sleep. Another verse from my spirit rose to my understanding like the sweet potency of an aromatic candle shop: I went to sleep, but my heart stayed awake. [I dreamed that I heard] the voice of my beloved as he knocked [at the door of my mother’s cottage]. Open to me, my sister, my love, my dove, my spotless one [he said], for I am wet with the [heavy] night dew; my hair is covered with it. (Song of Solomon 5:2). The verse came like an undercurrent of sugary water to my heart…and inside I saw Jesus at the door of a secret alcove in my heart. I heard a voice speak from within, “It’s Me. I’m speaking to you through the pleasure. Let me in deeper beloved.”
I whispered to my holy Bridegroom, “every door in my heart I open to You without reservation.”
A tangible peace coated some deep part within my soul before my eyes finally fluttered close. That night I dreamed I was in Heaven. I was sailing on an endless crystal glass ocean like sapphire waters. Jesus was on the sail ship with me and before us was mountains covered with lush vegetation. Clouds of desert pink glowed and made images in the sky. I was in a sheer white dress and a golden crown—simple yet elegant was on my head. Jewels were pressed into the points of my crown. Jesus came from behind the steering wheel to my side. He grinned as he approached. His eyes were burning love. He spoke in a voice like many waters, “this is the ocean of my pleasure…of my goodness…of my provision. It is my delight that you sail on it always. It is my happiness to give you good and perfect things.” I turned to Him teary-eyed, “the only real goodness in my life is You…from which all these other blessings flow.” I hugged his neck and He took me in His arms and I never felt more loved. The sky was blue…so blue it appeared fluid. The colors here were beyond imagination and they burst with radiant light…
~I hope you enjoyed this sneak peak. If you want more stories on divine romance, see my Free Inspiration page. You can also purchase a copy of my book, Romantic Rendezvous for the Soul, by clicking here!
~If these stories have blessed you, please share the blessing with a friend <3
“There are many virtuous and capable women in the world, but you surpass them all!” – Proverbs 31:29 NLT
One of the
greatest compliments my husband has ever given me was comparing me to the Proverbs
31 woman.
I used to
hate that woman.
I thought
she was an impossible standard. The far-fetched, wishful thinking of Solomon’s
mother. Now, I realize that I only “hated” her because I secretly wanted to be
her but felt hopelessly inadequate. She was pie in the sky, a pipe-dream.
I still remember the night Stephen and I swung out of dad’s truck. It was in winter and the wind whipped at our hair as we headed into the grocery store. He peered at me as I strode forward with determination to be in and out of there “as quickly as possible.”
“You’re like the Proverbs 31 woman.” He said.
I was
startled and slowed my pace. At first, I wondered if it was a joke. But I knew Stephen. I knew he didn’t
speak frivolously.
“Really?” I prodded unbelieving.
“Yes,”
he answered directly. He then went on to tell me the reasons why.
Recently,
this woman that I once “hated” has come up again almost a year later. This time
not to haunt me, but to encourage and compliment me.
Listening to the voice of truth has often been like this for me. At first, the truth can come across as harsh and hateful but really the very core of truth is unconditional love.
When God’s truth meets your ears, do you hear love or hate?
The truth of God is meant to do one thing…set you forever free. Selfless love will always risk being persecuted or hated by the one it is trying to help. True love risks because love is more concerned about the person it is trying to reach. God’s love speaks to you, to give you wings above the storm. His truth is brighter than the sun. His truth is honey to the heart and strength to the soul.
I used to live in a perpetual state of victimhood. If anything in life seemed too hard, I would spiral into a rancid stew of self-pity. In our second year of marriage, Stephen came home from work to find me in such a stew.
I
was sprawled out on our bed…my head muffled between my arm and pillow. A flow
of tears trailed down my cheeks and spotted the pillow and my sleeves. I was in
a dark cloud of “why me?”
Stephen
unlopped his laptop bag and set it down in the corner. He sat at the edge of
the bed and put a large comforting hand on my shoulder before rubbing.
I
shuffled his touch away and turned my head. I secretly wanted his pity but didn’t
want to make it so obvious.
He
asked me what was wrong and I told him.
He
was quiet for a moment and then said something that made me want to smack him
across the face. He gave me the truth instead of sugar-coating me with a poisonous
lie.
“Is
that all?” he asked.
“What?!”
I questioned, incredulously.
“Ashley,
I love you but I don’t feel sorry for you and I won’t. I have compassion on you but not pity.”
I’m
pretty sure I flipped around and glared at him.
His
visage was calm, his body unmoving.
“You’re not a victim! And I won’t treat you like one. You’re the head and not the tail, above only and not beneath. God calls you a victor. He’s already given you victory in Jesus over this.”
He bent over to meet me at eye level. His cold blue eyes were serious and compassionate. After about a five-minute lecture, he left me in the room to go relax.
I thought he was the most insensitive, cruel creature that existed.
He doesn’t love me.
I was sure if he did, then he would meet my emotional needs by “loving on me.” Surely, he could have at least considered my excuses (I mean reasons) for being in the sorrowful state that I was. No, instead he knocked them all down with scripture of all things!
I hid in the room for almost an hour, trying to defuse my temper and come up with a reason why he was wrong. So wrong.
Looking back, I realize he did love on me! He loved me in the greatest possible way. He gave me the truth to light my path. He didn’t coddle the lies that I was believing, rather he exposed them. But because these lies felt like a part of me, I thought he was attacking me instead of what was hurting me.
I
know it can be difficult sometimes when we hear the truth.
It may not come in the way we want it. It may not even seem true. But I encourage you that those who love you the deepest will speak the truth to you. They will risk your backlash, they will risk offending you, they will risk your misunderstanding because they want to see you free. They love you enough to not protect themselves from you.
God loves you so much that he will attack every lie that’s holding you in bondage. He will come after every self-sabotaging habit. He sent His Son (who was full of grace and truth) not to judge the world but to save the world. The truth always saves. At the risk of the greatest possible pain and public shame, Jesus spoke the truth.
He sits in Heaven with permanent marks on his wrists and a stab wound to the side, because he loves us. He loved us enough to point us back to God.
The
book of Proverbs tells us repeatedly that the main distinction between the wise
and foolish was their response to the truth. The foolish will attack or reject
the voice of truth. The wise will thank the person who spoke truth over them
and then begin to apply that truth to their life.
Because of God’s truth, I now have three businesses. I chose to cast off my victim mentality and believe that I could do all things through Christ. I chose to forgive those who hurt me. I chose to forgive myself. Because of God’s truth, I have been elevated in ways that would have never happened if I held unto those lies. I feel like I’m walking in the way of my destiny. I’m living in my dreams. I feel fulfilled and satisfied. My life is extremely blessed!
My hands are more busy now than they have ever been. Yet, my work is blessed. My work is gratifying because Jesus has shown me how to co-labor with Him. My work not only profits myself, but my family and even people around the world. I have received so many praise reports and “thank you’s” from people that I didn’t even think I touched. I can look back after a long day and wipe the sweat off my brow with a smile. I smile as the sun sets because I know the fruit of this labor will last into eternity. I smile because grace is pouring upon my head and shoulders like fragrant water from heaven. I smile because, I’m finally learning to lay down my life to find it.
~I pray God speaks the truth to you today that will set you free. I pray you live out all your God-dreams, not out of selfish gratification, but through an intimate connection with Jesus. I pray you discover that you are the cream of the crop, more than a conqueror and beloved of God. I pray you stretch your arms out wide and welcome the warm sunshine of truth. I pray all darkness flees from your soul as lies are dismantled and exposed. I pray you take off and soar like an eagle above every storm in life. I pray you know the incredible joy and peace that comes from being loved on by God, from loving yourself, and then loving Him enough to choose His ways above your own. You were made to fly. Your life has eternal weight. You are a treasure worth the blood of Jesus. You are a co-laborer with Christ. You are a queen and priest in Him. No bondage or darkness is greater than Christ in you. Nothing can separate you from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. God has a hope and a future just for you!
~For information on my Life Coaching services, click here. <3 We are better together!
~Dear God, thank you for loving me, and for guiding me, for creating time for me to spend with You. For touching my hands and moving my heart
Have you ever sat blissed out from the rich and loving voice of God?
My heart takes flight, my eyes water from His grace.
Oh, to feel His soft touch waking you up to fellowship.
To be broken and then healed after His arms hold you. After Jesus cleans and washes you inside from His glowing light.
Oh, to see the haze of golden love.
Oh, to look out the window and see the white sparkling fog kiss this grassy land.
The ocean carrying peace.
Oh, to hear the beat of His worship-playing drums.
To be His child, found in His heart.
What a blessing to hear The Truth.
To be dearly loved by The Way, and The Life.
I can hear the voices and the music of worship floating and surrounding me on the outside, taking me, then seeping into me and ringing inside of me.
What joy it is to fall on my knees.
This love is unexplainable.
I have no worries.
I feel no fear in His presence.
Two words from Him are more than a thousand from a lover.
What seed has He planted inside of me? It has grown into a fruit-bearing tree that sees a constant gauzy sunrise. The deep colors of plump fruit hang and grow on it; raspberry, orange, peach, and red-colored fruit glisten in His light. Jesus creates fog that collects into drops of water on its green leaves, and then drips to a moist, rich soil, so lush with life.
What waterfall of blessings is this I see in the distance, behind purple mountains warmed by Life?
Its waters pour from Heaven, from the throne of Almighty God. Blue waters of every blessing He has given me fall like fountain water.
Why do my arms lift effortlessly?
They feel His touch and an offering is being given. How can such a love exist?
I’ve been taken away.
I’ve been divinely called and so have you.
Here I rest.
Here I lay.
Here I eat of His Word, of His fruit.
Here I abide in Christ.
Here I stroll through Heaven.
Here I visit the tabernacle, His home.
Here I climb Mount Zion.
Here I hear the angels’ praise. Their celestial voices powerful, beautiful, yet they meet my ears with a calming hum.
Here I twirl with praise like ripples, I move with the current of everlasting love. I touch the golden-colored flowers; I study the blue of the sky.
I am delivered a pen and paper to surrender, to share this incredible Love with anyone who’ll listen.
He longs to take you here.
To create this land inside of you.
Search deep inside your Spirit.
You can see it.
You can feel it.
You can taste it.
Maybe differently, but you do.
It rocks your heart and opens your senses.
He fulfills you like no one or nothing ever could.
Seconds with Him are worth more than a lifetime of wealth.
Our God reins, forever His kingdom stands! My feet have never caressed such soft coco-colored soil as they have in this land. My eyes have never gazed upon something more beautiful.
Have you ever sat blissed out from the rich and loving voice of God?
My heart has been made into the house of Jesus.
~This devotional was taken from my book Visions of Celestial Love. To find out more about it, visit the Purchasable Goody page. To buy a copy, click here. <3
